to think that motorbike racer who died racing was unfair on his DCs?

[TheEpilator]

Watched a film with DH the other night about the Isle of Man TT motorbike race and couldn't believe the ludicrous risks the racers took to partake in this event, during which it seems several people die each year.

Some of them (including one of the racers who died) had young DCs and I said that their fun shouldn't be at the expense of their families' happiness.

DH thinks I am unreasonable and used the old line "he could get hit by a bus tomorrow, at least he died doing what he loved". I think the guy who died (and anyone taking part in such dangerous pursuits for fun) was being quite selfish to deprive his DCs of their dad just so that he could have the thrill of the race. DH asked me to canvas your opinions.

Whose side are you on - mine or his?!...

I think I'm with you - the TT carries risks that are an order of magnitude (in some cases 2 orders of magnitude ) greater than any of the other risks mentioned on this thread, and I think it's a risk too far if you have young DCs.

But I think that if like me you don´t have that passion for a sport, you don´t "get" what drives them.

Wasn´t there a mother who died climbing K2?

She knew the risks & took them-that´s what I don´t get.

YABU

Bear in mind that TT riders are professional racers - yes they are doing it for 'fun' but it's also what helps pays the bills and keep a roof over their families' heads.

Just the same as an offshore worker or forces personnel or any other person in a hazardous occupation.

Or do you believe people doing dangerous jobs give them up as soon as they have children? It's not as if employment is easy to come by these days.

Iwouldn't stop them horse racing, but I wouldn't want them doing the Grand National!

But would you stop them if they ever wanted too though?

I think it is if the risk and the danger is part of the enjoyment for you

then a risk free climb or ride or whatever just doesn't mean very much. It's pushing the barriers, that's what people sometimes need to do, it inspires them...maybe that makes them me a bit mad.

There is something very beautiful about being in danger but keeping in control. It's when it fucks up that it turns on itself and wasn't worth it. When it goes right it is so worth it.

iyswim...

diddl That was Alison Hargreaves who died on K2.

Yes, she was a mother and died doing what she was paid to do - she was fully sponsored professional climber (by North Face IIRC).

Was she supposed to pack it in and stack shelves the minute she got pregnant?

I thought the same as you when I watched the film. If my DP even considered doing something like that I would leave him. No lie. No rush, no adrenaline, no sense of freedom is worth robbing your young DCs of a parent.

DPs parents have raced in the TT (sidecars) and my family are all involved in motorsport (F1, BTCC, etc). It's fun when you're young and have no ties, but it is dangerous. (As I believe the lovely Guy Thingumy voiced in the film).

A lot of people in the TT are not pro.

I'm on your side. Yes any of us could get hit by a bus tomorrow but unless we all turn into hermits and never go out, getting hit by a bus going about everyday business i.e crossing roads on school runs/getting/travelling to work etc is an unavoidable risk. Going to a race renowned for being dangerous is not in the same league.

Maybe it's due to the type of people that are attracted to different thread titles, but I find it so odd that recently a large number of posters told a woman on another thread that she shouldn't go across the road for two minutes to the shop while her baby slept in the cot as she could get knocked down/the house could go on fire/aliens could land, but the vast majority of people on this thread are saying putting your life in danger for fun is fine!

Sorry I mean not pro as in Moto GP proper job racers.

you do need a road race license I think or sponsorship etc

ooh, this one is tricky.

initially, i was with you, OP.

but then i got to thinking, well, what about dangerous jobs? should fire fighters have to leave the brigade once they have children? what about police officers, or security guards?

but then i thought, they're doing those jobs to put food on the table, a roof over their kids head, etc, whereas, a dangerous hobby is for fun.

but, you don't stop being you because you've got children. you are entitled to enjoy your life, & have fun- but at what expense? who's to say where the line should be drawn?

basically, i don't think either you or your DH is right, but i don't think either of you are wrong, either.

different strokes for different folks, i suppose.

Vasilia the ones who die tend to be.

I agree with you OP, some risks aren't worth taking. And I say that as someone who takes part in something that is classed as a dangerous sport. It's very safe when done sensibly though, and nearly all fatalities are because of human error, not accidents.

Malinois, I do think Alison Hargreaves should have packed in her job when she had children. But I think my viewpoint isn't popular.

This reminds me of Alison Hargreaves a mum of two young DC who died climbing K2. I was horrified at the time and even more horrified when her husband (soon to be ex I believe) took the children to the mountain to 'see where mummy died.

"Was she supposed to pack it in and stack shelves the minute she got pregnant?"

No, not if she didn´t want to.

She obviously thought that it was a risk worth taking or she wouldn´t have done it.

Upahill, I wouldn't stop them if they were old enough and had no-one but themselves to please. Once they are married and have DCs of their own I would hope that would make them think twice about who else is affected by the choices they make.

Mackerel, yes Guy Martin has it right - no ties, no girlfriend (what a waste!) as he knows that it would be difficult for him if he had to think about anything other than himself and the bike.

Malinois, I don't know about AH, but to me it does seem a little pointless to even BE a professional climber, let alone die doing it. I don't think the alternative is stacking shelves by the way.

In this instance there are plenty of other races with far fewer fatalities that would pay the bills for professional racers. I think maybe they just have to switch off a part of their brain to enable them to separate the thrill of the sport from the reality of it going wrong.

Vasilisa, DH was just explaining the same thing about how your body and the bike are working together to get it absolutely spot on and when it works perfectly it feels really good. Luckily (touch wood) he has never had it go wrong.

A foot in both camps here, I see both sides.

I know someone who used to run race teams, including at the TT. Once the lads had children he would refuse them a ride. Most of them did get rides with other teams.

Look at the Dunlops, however. Robert and Joey died racing but Robert's sons race now, pretty successfully. They grew up watching their dad and uncle race, would they be as good now if both of them had retired once the children came?

Ooh freaky X post MaryZ!

If I remember correctly I believe Alison Hargreave's son was going to follow in his mothers footsteps (so to speak) and attempt to climb K2.

Is that too risky? Or is that ok because he hasn't got children (as far as I know)

Upahill, how old is he?

So the crux of the argument is that once you have children don't do anything risky whether it is riding a motorbike, taking part in the Grand National, going in Space and making new discoveries.

So excitment is only for non parents.