to show I am asexual by wearing a black ring?

[asiatic]

Lots of asexuals wear a black ring on their right middle finger. I'm thinking of getting one. What do you thinK? Have you ever seen anyone wearing one? How would you respond to a policeman, or bus driver or teacher advertising that they are asexual? I'm thinking it might be a helpful message to avoid misunderstandings, or is it something you don't really want to know about a stranger? Would it influence your perception of other aspects of them?

I truly did not know that Tumblr was 4 year old...

I wear the black ring, not so that others can identify me as being an asexual but because of the meaning behind the original idea of the ring.

I grew up thinking I was broken until I discovered a word for it, asexuality, and many others did too. The black ring is, as I said, not for identification, rather it is to show a sense of community and to symbolize that you aren't alone in the way you think, that there are others like you.

Not every asexual person wears the ring and as such it is not a widely recognised symbol for others and it is rare to encounter someone who wears the same evidence of their sexually so clearly everyday however it does occasionally happen.

These zombie threads are pissing me right off!!

You are not alone Waitrose but I rather think it's being done on purpose exactly because it annoys. The world is full of one dimensional fuckwits

If I hadn't read this thread, I wouldn't have known that a black ring on the middle right finger had any significance.

Same here. MN is an education, for sure.

Initials+random numbers

Always a giveaway

Aw shite. I wasn't paying attention & thought there were only 19 posts, not 19 pages.

Well, one thing we've all learnt is that the idea of an asexual black ring never did catch on...

Who the fuck cares? No one.

Wow. I learn something new everyday on mumsnet!

Well everyday is a school day on MN. Had no idea about the ring OR the handkerchief etiquette (although that sounds very complicated, you would need to pass some sort of course to ensure you knew your colours)

At a wedding once the bride was wearing a black ring, which I recall was on the assexual finger.... i remember thinking it was an interesting choice of bridal jewellery.

I don't wear a wedding ring it became too small when I was pregnant with dc1 and someone was aghast and said it would be my own fault if I got unwanted attention I've never had unwanted attention in my life.

I thought I was pretty au fait with the spectrum of sexuality (or lack thereof in the case of asexuality) and I have never heard of a black ring as an ace symbol. I would assume it was a goth thing. It's up to you if you want to wear it, OP, but don't expect many people to understand the significance.

I had no idea about the black ring thing.

But I am now wondering what people are thinking about me based on the fact I wear a rainbow ring on my middle right finger!

(It is based on the fact that I really like rainbows)

It might work if you start a loud and country-wide campaign to inform people.

Otherwise, as pps said, you'll only tell other asexuals you are not attracted to them sexually. Which is irrelevant, because neither are they to you.

I think the idea is that it would help in the sense that another asexual could identify another in terms of being able to start an asexual relationship but it's 2016, not 1916 and these things don't need secret codes or secret clubs. There's other ways to meet people, online dating for one, because you can make people aware you are asexual and if they choose to look at your profile and talk to you, they know what the deal is. If they're looking for a sexual relationship, they won't contact you. Also people's sexuality really isn't a big deal these days and there's no shame in being asexual. If someone was to show interest in a sexual relationship with you then you can politely turn them down without having to give a reason, just like I do if a guy shows interest in me, sometimes I will give the reason I'm gay and other times I won't because I don't have to and it's my choice.

I think it's an awful shame that asexuals are resorting to wearing these rings, not that I've heard it myself, because it's closing them of and segregating them from everyone else and there's really not a need for that in 2016. Or ever.

I wear a black ring on that finger. Not asexual though.

Ah fuck.

Pissed me right off now fucking zombie

So it is. MNHQ, can you shut threads a year after the last post? Maybe revivable on request by the OP.

Dolkapots just to clarify, if it was my wedding then the black ring was a mood ring from a Christmas Cracker and was the first ring DH used when he suddenly decided to propose to me whilst I was loading the dishwasher in the early hours of Boxing Day morning!

Sprinkle I doubt it was you, it was a wedding band shape rather than a mood ring type (I remember those fondly!) I think it is safe to assume that the bride I saw is not assexual as she popped 4 kids out within 5 years

Nope not me then!

Lots of asexuals wear a black ring on their right middle finger. I'm thinking of getting one. What do you thinK? Have you ever seen anyone wearing one? How would you respond to a policeman, or bus driver or teacher advertising that they are asexual?

I most likely wouldn't notice. This sort of advertising is mostly for other asexual people, isn't it? If I did notice, I wouldn't give a damn. After all, asexuality is the absence of sexuality, so ... nothing indecent there.

Anyway, if you don't want to be molested by male strangers, wear a gold ring on your ring finger. Your lack of interest won't be nearly as efficient in repelling assholes as the idea that you are already owned by another male does.

So what is the etiquette if you see a doctor/bus driver/policeman wearing one? Is there a secret handshake? Some type of acknowledgement of some type?

I would just think you liked black rings. Why do you want to tell people about your sex life or lack of interest in one? Can't people keep stuff private any more? People who are your friends will know, people who aren't don't care.

This needfs a ZOMBIE THREAD ALERT. Why do people do this?