Bogeyface Thu 16-Feb-12 14:50:07
"The point that I and others are trying to make is that accidents happen and it is in the best interests of everyone concerned to have an adult who is able to cope in an emergency present. A 12 year old would most probably panic in the even of say, a fire, and while yes there is also the chance that an adult would panic too, they are more likely to be able to think clearly about what they need to do to get everyone to safety."
I am not convinced that a level-headed 12yo who is used to dealing with problems without an adult would be more likely to panic than an adult.
When our train caught fire in Greece, my younger brothers (13 and 11) stayed calm and followed instructions, though there was at least one hysterical adult on the train.
I think by the time you get to 12 it is a question of personality and training (except for that brief period when hormones take over for some teens).
When emergencies happened at our home, I dealt with them calmly and sensibly, in fact far more calmly than my 4 years older brother did. My parents knew this and felt far safer if I was in charge.
My little brother did have an accident: I dealt with it. He did fall ill: I dealt with it (and rang his school and did all the other things required).
I would feel far more confident that my children would deal well with an emergency than some adults I know. I base this, as my parents did, on how they have dealt with minor emergencies.
When ds cut his hand open playing in a field outside our holiday cottage, dd (who was then 10) did not panic though there was a fair bit of blood; she calmed him down and got him to a place where he could get help. In fact, she did exactly the same- no more, no less than I was able to do for her when she fell and injured her head a few years previously. And he was reassured by the presence of his sister.
Yes, you would feel dreadful if the baby had an accident when you were in charge as a 12yo. But trust me, you will feel equally dreadful at any age. Personally, I know the reason I have coped so well with some pretty grim parts of my own motherhood is because this was not my first taste of being in charge of another human being. It didn't feel like something totally new and scary, but like a development of something I had already started training for.