To be pretty upset that ds1 has been assessed as overweight and not to find any of the 'Top Tips' relevant to us?

[lecce]

Ds1 (4.10) was weighed and measured at school and we received a letter today telling us he is on the 91st BMI centile and therefore is just into the overweight category.

Of course I am upset. I had no idea there was a problem. I suppose he does look a little more 'solid' than some children, indeed some children I see do look particularly tiny. Ds has no rolls of fat, no double chin and his tummy still sticks out a bit (only noticeable when naked) and you can see and feel his ribs.

The last time he was weighed and measured (about 2 years ago) he was on the 75th centile for height and the 50+ for weight - so longer than wide. However, now these seem to have swapped over and he isn't so tall but appears to be chunkier.

I have always considered his diet to be good. The booklet the NHS have sent is full of tips about cutting down on biscuits, crisps etc but we very rarely have these. We don't keep biscuits in the house, or crisps. He loves all fruit and mostly snacks on that or oat cakes but he doesn't snack a huge amount at all. We may put peanut butter on the oatcake, but spread it thinly. Puddings are fruit, alone or with Greek yoghurt. About once every six weeks or so we bake flapjacks or fruit muffins. We visit MacD's once every six weeks or so. Dh cooks all our meals from scratch - pasta sauces etc. I noticed today he'd put a little butter on the potatoes and carrots - should we not be doing that at all?

Among my friends, I am considered on the strict side regarding food but, in fact, nothing is off limits but it is limited, iyswim. His diet has a few 'naughty' things in it but is basically pretty good and very low on processed food. He only drinks water with the occassional glass of milk or carton drink when we are out - a couple of times a month.

He walks to school, goes to the playground for 30-40mins every day, has swimming lessons once a week, dance lesson once a week and uses his scooter, balance bike or legs both days of the weekend pretty much without fail. He is not a total whirlwind, like some boys his age, but that is just his nature and he's certainly no couch potato either.

I just feel so down about this - like we have let him down. The letter is saying about how he is likely to suffer from health problems and be overweight as an adult and I could just cry. Yet looking through the tips, we already do pretty much everything they suggest. I really didn't think young children were supposed to follow a 'low-fat' diet, I though it was about balance but we've obviously got it wrong .

Would love some suggestions from anyone about what we could do about this.

Btw, I am not overweight (slightly under) and dh is a little but he is ridiculously tall so hides it well! We all eat the same food, pretty much, though not the same portion sizes, obviously.

Folkgirl that works fine for adults, but what about children?

I was being a bit cheeky because your question made the "can you pinch more than an inch?" question pop into my head!!

The thing is, my DD's BMI is 12.3. BMIs aren't appropriate for children under the age of 18.

In my classes I know there have been children who have been identified as
'obese' (parents have said) and it' obvious from looking at them they're anything but. But then I've also taught 5 year olds who can't get clothes to fit them width-wise and they've had little boobs and big wobbly cellulite covered tummies. I think at that point you've got to try to address it. A covering of fat is good, once they start propelling themselves along using their arms to balance as they waddle, get out of breath and refuse to join in for PE that's not so good.

If a child eats healthily and exercises and has parents who understand what "eating healthily" and "exercise" mean then I doubt there's much to get worried about. Whatever the charts and calculators say. Otherwise you're in "computer says no" territory.

If your DH does the cooking check how much oil he is wacking in, I find men tend to think they are Jamie Oliver and literally pour the stuff in. That would be an easy change to make.

Wow - I had no idea this took place. It sounds vey flawed and invasive. The OP sounds like a great mum doing everything right, which is exactly the type of parent this letter will hurt but not educate as they already know what to do and how to feed a child.

BMI is a terrible indicator - my sisters DP is a body builder with less than 5% bodt fat but using BMI he would be classed as obese.

I am worried now as my DS in only a baby but on the 91st percentile for weight and the 98th for height. When are you asked to sign consent forms as I probably won't - although like LineRunner says I don't want to make him the "different" one when he goes to school so arghh

OP it sounds like you have a perfectly normal healthy child and you sounds like a wonderful mum so throw that letter in the bin and carry on bringing him up the way you are

catgirl BMI may not be appropriate for body builders, but most children do not have the proportions of a body builder so that argument is irrelevant.

These measures are taking place because obesity is a very serious problem in the UK, and much of Europe. If a child is obese, the chances are they will remain obese all of their lives. The problem is, many parents simply do not see when their child is overweight, preferring to use the words solid, chunky, etc, and an objective measurement is needed. Hence the use of BMI, which is objective.

You have all this joy to come, Catgirl!

I think you are dead right about it being flawed and invasive. It is very telling that children don't want to be weighed and measured, but are anxious about being 'opted out' by their parents because that might draw more attention to themselves.

People. Seriously. Catch A Grip.

He's a small child. Unless he looks like a Weeble he's not really got a problem.

Feed him health-ish stuff with everything in moderation and I'm sure he'll have a growth spurt and it will all even out.

And remember. BMI is a load of big fat bollocking shite for kids and for anyone doing a lot of exercise. DS was measured at school, he was clinically obese, according to the BMI.

Was he fuck. He was competing in a sport at international level and was incredibly fit.

Apply a dose of common sense.

Oh and I'm another refuser, Trois, DD2 is small for age and very petite and light and I know they would have a blue fit and want to monitor - for what? To what end? What would they do? Put her on a rack to stretch her? She'll grow when she's ready - I'm short and I used to be skinny she's probably just short and skinny.

I remember being weighed at primary school 30 years ago, this isn't a new thing.

My son is also sporty and is developing quite a lot of muscle now. I agree that BMI is - to use differentname's technical term - a load of big fat bollocking shite for kids.

Maybe try slightly reducing portion sizes? Certainly no need for a low-fat diet, cutting out all butter etc. I don't think low-fat is recommended for young children anyway.

As others have said, it might well all work itself out if he's due a growth spurt. It's just something to keep an eye on.

These letters are a blunt instrument aimed at helping parents who really have a problem providing a healthy diet and lifestyle for their children.

They are not really aimed at someone like you who is providing these, but their child just happens to naturally be heavier than average.

Try to forget about it and just focus on bringing your child up to be healthy - as it sounds you are doing admirably. If you get a complex about his weight he will sense it and that could cause him more problems.

Try to ignore it. These letters are simply part of a countrywide public health programme and you aren't really the target audience.

ok - tell me if I am wrong but I am not getting the growth spurt argument - I wonder what the older generation would say. I thought that before a growth spurt they should look 'normal' then after they look like bean poles? People on here are suggesting instead that they look like little tubbsters then grow to end up looking normal?

Disclaimer - I am not a doctor, I have no health qualifications but I have had many many children

Some grow first, then fill out so they look like a total skinny minny beanpole, then it evens up

Some get chunky then grow and it evens up

BUT IT USUALLY EVENS OUT

And bear in mind, we are not all the same height and weight - there is a range.

And muscle weighs a lot more than fat so if you have a very active child then they will weigh "heavy" on the daft charts.

(Can you tell I never bothered much with charts and graphs and just kind of trusted my common sense?)

"look like a total skinny minny beanpole first"

I can't wait LineRunner. :)

Belgo - BMI is just as flawed for children as it is for body builders.

I think I would be tempted to send my letter back saying I was more worried about a school using flawed data and bad science to assess the children in it's care than the amount of yoghurt DS was getting on his fruit. Perhaps next time it would just be quicker for them to consult the I'Ching to determine who was in need of a letter as it would be about as a reliable a method.

the problem is though, is that it is not evening out for a significant proportion of children.

And for many of those children, it is not all muscle.

usefull, yes.
but imo it should not be done in a school setting.

It's done at school simply for convenience. It was done in school 30 years ago, it's done in schools in other countries.

Belgo - do you honestly think that a letter from the school is going to make a difference if someone really truly has a clinically obese child, due to the poor diet choices that the parent is making for that child?

I can't see it myself, but I could be wrong.

I suspect i may get a similar letter for my dd when she is weighed and measured. Although not fat, she is probably more stocky than average. Oddly enough, her elder sister who gets offered the exact same food is very slim. I probably will read the info they send. I doubt there will be any revelations, but there may be something i can tweak. I don;t see this scheme as a bad thing. There is an obesity problem. Some people need to change their lifestyle, some may just need a few tweaks here and there. You will know if your child is overweight because they are very muscular, or if they might overeat a bit or get a few too many treats and act accordingly.

With the growth spurt thing, I was just thinking that height and relative weight are not necessarily linear in young children, so just because he's overweight for his height right now, doesn't mean he will be in a year or so, even if nothing else changes.

It is worth keeping an eye on though, in case things don't 'even out'. And I think that's what the letters are about, not cause for panic but just raising parents' awareness. It often is very difficult for parents to judge when their child is overweight.

Agree about BMI being a 'blunt instrument', but it does give a reasonably good indication for most people. There is a broad range of 'healthy' weights for a given height (at least for adults there is) which accounts up to a point for the fact that people have different builds and body types. Not so useful for extremely muscular people e.g. serious bodybuilders or elite athletes, but then the majority of the population does not fall into that category!

Which film is the line

"You have been weighed, you have been measured and you have been found wanting" from?

I say it to my DS after every baby clinic visit (although I change it to not been found wanting) but I can't remember where it is from

differentnametoposthere tbh I think the government is acting out of desperation.

It probably makes some parents (such as the one in the OP) think about what they are feeding their children.

But unfortunately many other parents will rant and rave, proclaiming an extra chin or tubby tummy is perfectly healthy.

A Knight's Tale, wasn't it? The one with Heath Ledger as a medieval-type knight?

I consented to the data collection as I thought it was just that - so they could work out average statistics with no personal data kept. I didn't think they would be sticking their noses in to DDs weight and telling us how to parent her!