To be pretty upset that ds1 has been assessed as overweight and not to find any of the 'Top Tips' relevant to us?

[lecce]

Ds1 (4.10) was weighed and measured at school and we received a letter today telling us he is on the 91st BMI centile and therefore is just into the overweight category.

Of course I am upset. I had no idea there was a problem. I suppose he does look a little more 'solid' than some children, indeed some children I see do look particularly tiny. Ds has no rolls of fat, no double chin and his tummy still sticks out a bit (only noticeable when naked) and you can see and feel his ribs.

The last time he was weighed and measured (about 2 years ago) he was on the 75th centile for height and the 50+ for weight - so longer than wide. However, now these seem to have swapped over and he isn't so tall but appears to be chunkier.

I have always considered his diet to be good. The booklet the NHS have sent is full of tips about cutting down on biscuits, crisps etc but we very rarely have these. We don't keep biscuits in the house, or crisps. He loves all fruit and mostly snacks on that or oat cakes but he doesn't snack a huge amount at all. We may put peanut butter on the oatcake, but spread it thinly. Puddings are fruit, alone or with Greek yoghurt. About once every six weeks or so we bake flapjacks or fruit muffins. We visit MacD's once every six weeks or so. Dh cooks all our meals from scratch - pasta sauces etc. I noticed today he'd put a little butter on the potatoes and carrots - should we not be doing that at all?

Among my friends, I am considered on the strict side regarding food but, in fact, nothing is off limits but it is limited, iyswim. His diet has a few 'naughty' things in it but is basically pretty good and very low on processed food. He only drinks water with the occassional glass of milk or carton drink when we are out - a couple of times a month.

He walks to school, goes to the playground for 30-40mins every day, has swimming lessons once a week, dance lesson once a week and uses his scooter, balance bike or legs both days of the weekend pretty much without fail. He is not a total whirlwind, like some boys his age, but that is just his nature and he's certainly no couch potato either.

I just feel so down about this - like we have let him down. The letter is saying about how he is likely to suffer from health problems and be overweight as an adult and I could just cry. Yet looking through the tips, we already do pretty much everything they suggest. I really didn't think young children were supposed to follow a 'low-fat' diet, I though it was about balance but we've obviously got it wrong .

Would love some suggestions from anyone about what we could do about this.

Btw, I am not overweight (slightly under) and dh is a little but he is ridiculously tall so hides it well! We all eat the same food, pretty much, though not the same portion sizes, obviously.

To contextualise, I have to go hunting for DD3' clothes to make the waistband fits tight enough. I usually give up and buy stuff in France, although even there it's getting harder. Only my DS has ever looked even vaguely like left-hand kid and even at his widest moments, DS was never that chunky.

Is there a danger of assessing children's diets too much in terms of weight? I ate tonnes of fatty, sugary food as a child, loathed fruit and vegetables and didn't get nearly enough exercise. Yet I've always been borderline underweight for my height. I just don't seem to gain weight. Are some parents given a false sense of security by letters sent home saying that their DC is a 'healthy' weight?

All kids are diffferent. DS1 doesnt eat a massively different diet from the rest of us, but he has always been big. My 'overweight' son is one of the the biggest and tallest kids in his year.

At 13 he is now also playing prop for the schools 1st XV. He is having a great time! I havent heard anyone comment negatively on his size since he stated propping up the front row at Rugby.

because of his lifestyle being active his "chunkiness" could be muscle mass rather than fat and muscle is heavier than fat

Exactly. These measurements and 'results' are bloody clumsy and often pointless, and it's an expensive programme, and the parents who fret about the letters aren't he ones who are really being targeted anyway.

The real correlation for concern for me is where you have fat younger childen who have missing, filled or decayed teeth.

aren't the ones

sorry - typo

I think there is a real issue here. The problem is that undoubtedly obesity is becoming an increasing problem amongst children: I am a paediatrician and in my clinic am increasingly asked to see children who are very genuinely seriously overweight, with resultant "adult" type problems like high blood pressure and insulin resistance ( a precursor of type 2 diabetes.)
On the other hand with the schools weighing programme we now regularly read in the papers about cases of children that have had letters sent to their parent's saying they are overweight when clearly they aren't- there was an article in the daily mail on Monday about 1 such case.
As far as I can see the inaccuracies come from 2 main sources: those in whom weight for height has not been considered (i.e. they are tall on the 90th+ centile and have a weight on a similarly appropriate centile) and BMI not calculated and those in whom the BMI is not a helpful measure. People, including children who are very muscular may have a high BMI but actually have very little fat on board.
My own sons are of mixed race and have a very muscular body type. There is not an ounce of fat on them but they are tall 75th centile and weight is on the 91st centile. I look forward to receiving similar letters when they start school.
In some children it would be better to consider a measurement like waist measurement as part of the child measurement programme which would iron out some of these inaccuracies.
Do not be in any doubt however that the weight and lifestyle of our children is becoming an increasingly worrying issue which, if not identified and tackled now is going to cause a lot of grief later on.

"Anyway, can't believe people don't recognise the two overweight ones. Can that really be true?"

Hand on heart - my SIL's (who both have obese children) wouldn't think the middle child was overweight.

I can believe it. When the average person in a population is overweight, that becomes the "norm" and people confuse normal/usual with healthy when it comes to weight. In our heads, being overweight is still a minority thing, so the average person can't be overweight, even though that's not factually correct anymore.

That is why obesity is not solvable at population level. The majority of people are happy to "run with the pack"

Why the f*ck was my post deleted?? I didn't say anything offensive?? Just because I talked about my job - which actually means that I do have some idea of what I'm talking about when it comes to statistics and figures on childhood obestity.

So everyone else is allowed to slag off Slimming World - or rather anyone who says they follow the principles of it for their whole family (rather than making their child follow it!!), but I can't defend it and take part in the discussion.

Jesus - some people need to get a life. Morons. I don't know I bother with this site.

Stomps off and has a hissy fit................................ slams door!

Sorry I haven't read the whole thread but just wanted to say that height/weight ratio isn't an accurate way f determining bmi you really need a proper monitor (that send electric signals and can say how much is muscle and how much is fat)
Also
I notice with my own DS that he puts on weight and looks a bit chubbier or a week or 2 before a growth spurt then he looks skinny again after growth spurt, if your DS is the same it could just be a poorly timed examination?

Wow what athread.

Leece I think the important thing here is the trend, the direction in which his BMI is headed. I would suggest you get him weighed and measured again in 6 months to a year. He may well be back in the normal range by then. However if his BMI is still increasing it might be worth making a few changes to either diet or exercise. Fortunately we are not all the same and whilst some people of all ages,seem to be able to eat everything and stay a healthy weight, others cannot and need to be more controled.

It is distressing to have to restrict a child's intake, but much more so to have obeses secondary aged children, whose weight will start to affect their mental and physical health.

Yes, we are going to be more careful with fat in cooking (mostly it's Olive oil that dh uses, if that's relevant) and will cetainly check him out again in 6 months or so.

I feel he probably is due a growth spurt as he's been in the same trousers and some tops (very long back like dh!) for a year, I still have to adjust the elastic waists inwards on most of them and he's had the same shoes for nearly a year as well. For comparison, I have a frend with a son 18 months older than ds who passes me clothes sometimes and she is always saying she's bought stuff and he's outgrown it in a few months - that never happens with ds.

Shag (if you don't mind being called that ) the links you posted were really useful. I can't believe people would consider the second 2 Sun pictures acceptable and even the first looks chunky to me. Ds doesn't look like that, even taking into account it is an older child. The other link was really helpful to me. When dh and I looked at it we both thought that only the first child would be underweight but it is the first 2 - showing that not all children have to be bony/skinny. We both see ds as most closely matching the third child. That has reassured me a lot because some posters seem to be implying children MUST be skin and bone but clearly not everyone is shaped like that.

I have found this thread really useful and, though I don't think radical action is needed on our part, we are going to make some adjustments. I suppose we have been guilty of thinking that because we seldom buy junk, there was no need to question our diet - we are rethinking that a bit.

I think naughtymummy is bang on about recognising the general trend of your DC's weight and height as he grows.

lecce My son quite similar to yours in that he doesn't constantly gradually grow. He has 'fallow' periods and growth spurts.

We can all make our eating habits healthier without invoking diets and giving our kids complexes about food. We can all get our kids a bit more active, whether it's walking to school, a Wii, going for walks or persuading them join a club. Or something.

your food seems really good for him but i woulden,t put butter on vedge,s though has long has he,s active don,t worry it seems like a verygood mix of fruit and vedge.

OP does your ds have school dinners? dd got one of those letters at the end of Reception, and she had indeed got noticeably plumper over the course of the year. We've subsequently discovered that school dinners include a choice (a choice! for 4 and 5 year olds!) of "cake and custard" every day, and that the dinner ladies always give her a bit extra of whatever is on offer "because I'm such a good eater".

I'm sure that school dinners would never be the whole story, but it could be a contributing factor given that the rest of his diet seems to be so good.

Anyway, I feel your pain. It is a horrible thing and not at all easy to resolve.

My son is classed as obese. But he is an athlete, with a six pack, and more muscles than you can imagine, at 12.

When he stops training (like over Christmas) he very quickly turns to fat.

Other kids he trains(swimming) with are similar - they get quite podgy at times, some of the boys develop moobs and the girls all seem to go through a pot bellied/no bum phase. Then suddenly they have boobs and hips or pecs and six packs.

Id say look at your child and trust your instincts.

My seven year old DD told me she had fat thighs the other day. She does athletics, swimming and dancing and is active. She has a muscular build -high round bottom, large calf muscles, muscly thighs, six pack stomach. She is a very fast sprinter. She is sturdy and will never be skinny like some of her friends.

It's sad that already she is critical of her body as she is not 'skinny' I wish we could celebrate athleticism in children (especially girls) more. If you look at the bodies of athletes they are powerful and often stocky - look at tennis players etc

I've just been through that BMI calculator and if your son was 1lb lighter he would be in the healthy range.
I cannot believe the fuss this has caused for the sake of one pound. Not having a go at you OP, but this letter has caused you a lot of worry.
FOr the sake of 1 lb

With my son's height there is 4lbs between the healthy weight and the obese weight. 4LBS!!!
It nonsense afaik

And I won't be giving consent, simply because I don't want to contribute to a bunch of facts and figures that I think are complete nonsense.

My BMI suggests that I need to be harpooned by Captain Ahab.

Yet I look normal.

lostboys- it's not about the number of pounds, it's the proportion of overall body weight that is the issue. 4 lbs for a small child is a lot.

But how are they to know how much weight is muscle and how much is fat?

There is a range of 'healthy' weights for each height, which should take into account the normal variation in build, i.e. some people are more sturdy/muscular than each other. There will be exceptions for people who have a very unusual body type, i.e. extremely muscular and athletic with a very low body-fat percentage, but that doesn't apply to most of the population, and certainly not to most small children.

So no BMI is not a foolproof measure by a long way, and can't take everything into account, but it's a useful indicator for most people. If you fall outside the 'healthy' range it doesn't mean that there's definitely a problem with your (or your child's) weight, but it means the possibility is worth considering.

The most common reason (by a long way) that people exceed the healthy weight range is because they're too fat. Not the only reason, but the most likely one. Many people are kidding themselves when they say 'it's all muscle'.

"In some children it would be better to consider a measurement like waist measurement" - the trouser test!

4lbs is a lot for a youngish child - DS is about 1/9th of my weight so 4lb would equate very crudely to 36lbs on me - I'd consider that to be a lot of extra weight.

Anyway as I said earlier - obese children don't suddenly appear out of darkened cupboards blinking in the daylight at a morbidly obese weight - they get there slowly via "oh really he's hardly overweight at all ignore the silly charts". OP is wise to have decided to reassess what/how they eat and keep an eye that he at the very least isn't moving further up the charts and hopefully he moves down them back to where he was before.

And I say this as someone who used to be morbidly obese. I didn't wake up one morning 10 stone overweight to my astonishment.