The relationship section of MN makes my blood boil.

[aaaaaaaaargh]

I will never set virtual foot in there again. I have imprints on my forehead of the keyboard from where I have been banging my head against it. It makes no SENSE!!! I have a jaw like Jacob Marley. There are so many threads like this:

OP: The other day I was a miserable cow, kids were stressing me. He came home to a complete shithole and then proceeded to clean up. I could sense he was a bit miffed at the state of the house so I told him to cook his own fucking dinner. He wanted to tell me about a problem with work, but I was pissed off and told him I wasn't interested, tell someone who gives a shit. He then shouted that I didn't give a toss about him and stomped upstairs. I can't live like this anymore.

Reply: He cleaned up?? How controlling is he? He then tried to make you listen to his work problems? What about YOUR problems?

Reply: He's emotionally abusive, but you know this don't you.

Reply: Definitely controlling, he doesn't care about what you want. He wanted to make you clean up and listen to his problems. Why the fuck are you cooking his dinner?

Reply: He shouted at you? This is abusive behaviour. You don't have to put up with this, you need to really think about how to proceed. Has he shouted before? This isn't normal.

Reply: Well actually, you weren't too pleasant to him. Perhaps you should look at YOUR behaviour.

Reply (to above poster): Great support there, this woman lives with an emotional abuser. Don't speak if you haven't got anything constructive to say. Don't listen to that poster OP.

Etc, etc....

I know that a lot of people in seriously abusive or violent situations have been helped in this section, and that that is an extremely good thing, before you point that out to me.

But some of the replies on other threads!!! Madness.

why not, want to pass them off as your own work?

it surprises me there isn't really such a thing as misandry yet considering, as I said, all the ammunition in terms of violent offences and war. Our better natures must prevail or we are simply not evolved enough yet.

#why not, want to pass them off as your own work?

As a balanced human being, no. Want to pass them off as yours? You asked for examples, I gave you them.

Haha, nobody has ever accused me of balance! Yes, you know I wrote them. You didn't stumble upon them by chance.

Don't really need to say anything else do I?

I've lurked over at relationships but life's too short for some of that crap nonsense.

My DP/Ex/etc is a wanker.

Everyone puts the boot in and explains how to screw him over.

Not exactly real advice you'd get at your best friends house on the couch with ice cream and a black and white film.

What are you hanging around for then, like a dog that cleverly fetched something for its betters? Do you want a biscuit?

I think the 'quotes' (taken out of context BTW) actually do more to prove the stalkerish tendencies of the OP than anything else. I certainly fail to see how one poster's words can be considered representative of the entire Relationships board.

I was categorically told on this thread that there was no misandry on MN.

I don't think it's stalkerish to provide examples, particularly when I had been ASKED to provide examples.

I looked at one thread. Had I looked at 500 threads I'd have more quotes, but I can't be bothered. Those three simply illustrate my point.

#What are you hanging around for then, like a dog that cleverly fetched something for its betters? Do you want a biscuit?

Charming.

I would think that there is misandry on the relationship board that goes without saying.

Maybe it's all in the semantics of the statement because some people wouldn't like to accept that misandry exists.

But that isn't misandry. If misandry is supposed to be the equivalent of misogyny, where is the institutionalised hatred of men? How do one poster's words affect men on a societal level?

You can say an individual poster hates men. I can accept men-hating as a characteristic of individuals. However, there is no institutionalised form of man-hating that affects men's life chances, career chances, health and social status.

I'm not getting into semantics sunshine i'm just expressing a view.

Mumsnet can be considered to be an institution of sorts and individualised acts of misogyny can be registered...so therefore so can individual acts of misandry.

Simples..

i think there are 2 seperate issues that are being taken with the relationship board;

1. misandry
2. over use/accusation of 'abuser'

Op has provided quotes/ links that back this up. But 4 quotes and 2 links (one of which was a thread from 2007 I think?and isin AIBU) doesnt mean that it is entrenched within the board. Im pretty sure I could provide as much evidence to show that MN is racist/misogynistic/homophobic/disablist etc etc

I fail to find anymore words to defend 'relationships'; I dont really think it needs to be done. The very use of 'misandry' says alot about your starting point. Its like the 'racism against white people' debate

Ok. I'll quite happily accept that MN is the equivalent to centuries of laws that permitted men to rape and beat their wives, refused them the vote and denied them the chance to have an equal education or career.

exactly exactly what sunshine says

Why shouldn't the poster use the word 'Misandry' if it's there it exists...dismissing the view is ignorant.

^misandry, misandria
an extreme dislike of males, frequently based upon unhappy experience or upbringing. Cf. misogynism.^

It's just making excuses.

You're advocating male hate or at least excusing it because you think it's fair, that's dreadful and shocking.

I'm going to leave flounce from this thread because it's becoming a nonsense.

Talk about wilful misinterpretation!

I am not advocating hate toward men at all. I am simply pointing out that any hatred toward men felt by individual women cannot even compare to the hatred dished out toward women over the millennia because it is not backed up by law and/or culture. It consists of isolated views of individual women that has no power to affect the lives of men generally. Whereas when men contribute to hatred of women, it taps into a wealth of cultural heritage and therefore has the power to harm. As one example, think of rape myths.

#Ok. I'll quite happily accept that MN is the equivalent to centuries of laws that permitted men to rape and beat their wives, refused them the vote and denied them the chance to have an equal education or career.

Why are you getting so uptight? Did I say misogyny was a good thing? I mention misandry and the thread is flooded with feminists trying to shut me and others up. Can't I have a voice?

#It's funny, i had never seen that thread from 2007 before last year when that sadsack with the facebook page and the youtube videos got in a froth about it, and now you linking to it OP.

It's funny isn't it, two completely different people getting het up about a thread from 2007? aren't coincidences funny?

Isn't putting 2 + 2 together and getting 5 funny.

I remembered that thread, I have been a member of MN on and off for years (mostly lurking since DS1 was born). I could have linked to others, but that one was particularly bad.

I don't remember saying misandry was a good thing either, but I was accused of it and was answering foglike's post. But I suspect that you will deliberately choose to stalk, misrepresent, misinterpret and generally undermine rather than contribute to anything sensible.

If you are really concerned about men being mistreated, what are you doing about campaigning for greater paternity rights, male DV shelters, etc. Or are you actually more concerned, god forbid, that a tiny little corner of the internet isn't following the male-dominated norm.

Why are you getting so uptight? Did I say misogyny was a good thing? I mention misandry and the thread is flooded with feminists trying to shut me and others up. Can't I have a voice?

I know LOLing is a bit of a faux pas on MN but LOL!

Accusations of 'Misandry' IS often used to try and shut women up

Q: How many feminists does it take to make a flood?
A: 3!

IS? ARE? maybe.....

Is it any wonder there is an anti-feminist back lash right now? Patronising? Much?