Am I crazy or catholic church wrong to deny First Communion to Downs Syndrome child?!

[mummybiz]

My ex parish and the ex school of my children - which we left after my son was bullied- another story) has gone a step to far this time in my opinion see tinyurl.com/7qkqz9a denying a Downs Syndrome child the chance to take his first communion. I can't think of this as anything other than blatant and horrible discrimination - what do you all think?

Stranded

Mine would say 'warning, argumentative cow'

So, basically you want a chance to slag off the school/parish for mishandling the bullying of your child and you've decided to do it through this?

I'm sorry about your child suffering.

Don't label other people's children.

No one is restricted to the Catholic church. If you want something that is about community then (afaik - though that's not saying much) pretty well every other Christian church is open to you.

I remember being absolutely shocked when I found that not everyone who went to church a) went every week and b) took Communion every week. There were churches where you didn't have to go?????

I am not shocked that the responses to my original post have degenerated into personal attacks on me and the parents as this is what invariably happens in mumsnet forums. The odd few are incapable of remaining calm and rational and start to get personal. Someone has suggested that I am jumping on the issue because of disgruntlement at the school - if that is what you wish to believe then so be it but you couldn't be further from the truth. The catholic church and this parish is no exception is struggling to keep bums on seats (my own included!) - it needs to change and develop in order to survive and if that means being more lenient about weekly attendance then I'm all in favour. It certainly won't help it's case with blatant discrimination.Some posters are hiding behind the arguement that these parents are only catholic in order to get there child into a good school - the school is middling to poor so that arguement doesn't wash in this case.

MildNarkyPuffin I am not labeling anyones child - I said sorry for my wrong insertion of the description of the child condition - as an SEN teacher in the past I am more than aware of not labeling - I was very upset about the story and wondered what others opinions were. I find it bizarre that other parents with children with special needs seem to be the most vociferous in attacking the parents in the story when I would have thought they would be the most supportive - or perhaps their children aren't facing such obvious discrimination? By the way just because the Daily Maiil has picked up the story it doesn't make it any less valid !

yy Jux.

We walked five miles by hook or by crook every Sunday and when I started playing in the folk group, all rode our bicycles with my guitar in the front basket

I'd pass my friends playing out and by the time we came back they had all gone inside.

Used to dread Easter because they always chose the longest prayers but didn't mind Midnight Mass because there were carols beforehand and the priest would always make really amusing passive-aggressive comments about the unusual turnout. This was boosted by the older children of the parish home from university who would all be there drunk to sing and then slope off

Guitars weren't allowed in church when I was a child. Not in our church anyway. We had a massive organ.

It took 4 posts for you to start having a go at MN. Four calm reasoned posts that asked for more info. They didn't even disagree with you!

And if you are a SEN teacher you should know not to refer to a 'Downs Syndrome child.'

OP I wasn't hiding behind the fact that these parents are only Catholic in,order to get their child into the school. I wasn't hiding at all. I asked if they were, because nothing I read here or in the article you linked to gave the impression that they gave a shit about their faith. I asked the next logical question.

Nor did you say sorry for using the wrong terminology. I think people have made valid points about waiting until the child is ready and the reasonable expectation that they attend mass (even one parent without the child). You called yourself a troll.

You just can't seem to get past the fact that this child has Downs Syndrome and that the church's decision has nothing to do with his disability can you OP?

I don't know what your problem is, but just because people disagree with you it doesn't mean they are 'attacking' anyone.

Imagine the newspaper headlines if you look at the flip side of this....

"Catholic church sneakily recruits child with special needs, knowing he has no understanding of the sacrament he's taking"

Would that be fair in your eyes?

I am noisily debunking your persistent assertion that this is about disability discrimination.
I am the parent of a child with sn.

Your suggestion that I think you are talking nonsense means tat my child has never suffered discrimination is like a master class in passive aggression.

If you are curious I find this thread irritating because it detracts from actual discrimination. It gives comfort to those who want to be dismissive of the genuine incidents of discrimination.
Using disability as a way to bang a personal drum is irresponsible

And if a child thought taking his First Holy Communion was about spending the day with his class mates then he wouldn't be considered ready for it either OP. I'm afraid I do not believe this op is as simple as it might be. That's when I started really wondering about the, er, parents' motivations.

Stranded but it's so lovely and spacious in here

zzzz it's a future Daily Wail headline for sure

Now, if you wanted to complain about women not being allowed to be priests, I'd be all with you about discrimination in the Catholic Church.

Answering your first question, and on what would be indeed a personal attack, yes, you are crazy.
And it would be the parish that was wrong. Not the Church, unless there were guidelines excluding all children with Down's syndrome.

And if you are a teacher you should know how to spell and how to use apostrophes. Something here really doesn't quite add up, does it.....

When I saw this report on the local news this morning I was outraged at the apparent discrimination being shown to this charming young boy and his family. I am a teacher of young people with a range of SLD/PMLD and so this is a very emotive subject for me. However, after reading further into the story, I truly believe the church is correct with this decision, as I don't believe Denum fully understands the concept. I also feel that his parents have done nothing to help prepare him or help him to understand this. If he is not yet ready, then it is something that could happen in the future, when he has been supported to understand the significance of the occasion, at whatever level is appropriate for him.

I have seen discrimination within a particular parish first hand when on a teaching placement at a catholic school. I went with the class to mass (excuse any incorrect terminology as I'm C of E) and on arrival was told by the teaching staff to "sit at the back with the naughty kids as it (the service) has nothing to do with you". Three out out of the four children had DS and the fourth had CP! I sat at the back with the "naughty kids" who were all lovely and in fact were better behaved than many of the children involved in the service. Afterwards the priest came to ask why I hadn't joined in and was outraged by the way I and the children had been treated. At the next service I was asked to join the class and noticed that there were no more excluded children sitting at the back!

Tinkerbelle, you have just reminded me of the Managing Females who infected my childhood church. They thought they were the priests' assistants, and knew everything. Oh boy, was it lovely to get too old to be managed any more and to be able to just wander away from one of them while being ordered about! You have reminded of one of my rites of passage, thank you! Oh, the freedom

DD suffers under a Managing Female at her CofE church, poor love. As neither dh nor I are church-goers, many of the congregation have stepped in to protect her in our stead. That's the sort of thing that gives Christianity a good name!