to feel like I've been kicked in the teeth.

[SillyOldBear01]

I got engaged on xmas day , weee! so did another mate.
I've not even set a date yet but perhaps stupidly got all giddy and told people who I wanted to be m.o.h/bridesmaids.
I asked other b to b to be a bm . she accepted seemed thrilled.
been chatting about plans etc.
I got told a date has been set but only close family know becasue its soon and only family will be going to daytime (grooms request). I'm not sure If i'm even invited to night do.
AIBU to feel like I'm gonna be totally humiliated and actually quite stunned and upset, like I dunno made to look stupid and its quite shitty tbn

Well older than 25 in our case, not sure about yours! Touche.

I used the 'mn royals' term with tongue firmly in cheek.

BTW, my sister who has the fear of God in her about getting married because she hates being the centre of attention, I am forever telling her to go off and get wed somewhere, just the two of them. but she won't, because she knows it will upset family (despite the fact she wants him to be her DH and he has asked her on numerous occasions, just she doesn't want the whole schebang 'I do' in front of everyone). madness.

I asked a friend to be my MOH. As I was having a teensy wedding, her duty was pretty much being my witness. I sorted my own Hen do, and she bought her own outfit.

I wouldn;t even bat an eye lid if she didnt invite me to her wedding, close as we are, as we want totally different things. She was happy to oblige in the role I asked of her, and I would oblige with whatever she wanted from me, even if that was not going as it was family only.

OP, being a bridesmaid is not a reciprocal thing, and if it pains you to NOT be invited to her wedding, fair enough, but you MUST separate that from you wanting her to be your BM....surely you would still want her to be your BM?

Can I ask, if you knew before asking that you weren;t invited to her wedding, would you still have asked her to be your BM? If not, then I don;t think you can call yourself a true friend.

christ, don't you start, wisdom

Supposed women?

Christ, this is getting tedious, and I only post rarely.

I was nice to you as well and you turned out to be one of them

She deserves to be crushed like a bug, how could she.

Only joking you are being a silly old zilla

I dont even know who this royalty is i think its bollocks, what you get is long term respected posters.

Nothing wrong with that at all.

OP, why don't you unBM your friend ?

that'll learn her

I am a supposed woman

Or is it suppository woman? I am so old, I have forgotten which

anyfucker

i am 26, so not old

BM=bowel movement in my line of work

unfortunate simile, for me

I think most of us would be lying if we weren't a teeny bit disappointed not to be invited to a wedding or some other do we hoped we'd be going to, but it IS one of those things that happens all the time....I got mildly offended the other week when I saw a friend was having a NYE party that I hadn't been invited to, even though a) it was miles away b) I probably wouldn't have gone even if I had been invited....it still smarted, though.

But = has she said why the wedding on the day is going to be so small? Is it for financial reasons or are they doing it quickly to keep family happy, etc?...there could be all sorts of family politics going down there.

As ScarlettPimpernel says - concentrate on doing your wedding the way you want.

giyadas, that'll learn you

op, please think objectively about this. there are bigger things, seriously. ring your friend, be excited for her and make small talk and don't make this an issue, just be same old same old. she has probably picked up on your negativity and that would be a shame.

wisdom, are you teasing me ?

that is an offence punishable by being clapped in iron and thrown into the dungeons

It's like a shopping list :)

Bride to be to be a bridesmaid?

By the way AF, I have no problem with what you posted at all - it's the reaction of other posters to the OP's somewhat clumsy rebuttal that I find embarrassing.

Have to agree with the outrage at 'supposed women' though. And at the idea that we should know better at our age!

yep, you are on the haterrz list, Op

have a farleys rusk biscuit

AF, yup, and I'm usually so good as well.

< flaunts greatest ratio of troll hunting posts deleted to actual posts of worth (!) certificate>

have you a blog, OP ?