Justified anger at the posters who were rude and hurtful on a past thread

[Roseability]

I haven't posted on Mumsnet for nearly a year and I am posting in this section, well because I suspect it is one of the most popular and I am hoping certain posters will read it

Just under a year ago, I posted about my ds (link provided below). An Early Years Educator had raised a concern that he was sometimes having problems following instructions.

She insinuated he had serious developmental problems and was quite negative about him. I posted for advice, because I genuinely felt she had got it wrong.

The response I got from some posters on that thread was quite frankly disgusting and had I not been too upset, I would have reported it at the time. I was called names, told I was a bad mother and told I was in denial about my ds.

I know that learning difficulties can be a sensitive area, but I stated time and time again that I was making no judgement about children with learning difficulties. I was following my instincts as a mother. Still I was insulted.

In the end my ds did have a speech & Lang assessment and he was discharged. He has settled into school really well. I still think about that thread now and then because at the time it put me in quite a bad place. I know it is strangers on the internet, but words hurt.

I suppose my point is, that I have read many a thread on here, of mothers who instinctively know their child is having developmental difficulties and are met with resistence by various authorities. It can work the other way. A mother who really believes her child is being misunderstood.

I would never neglect to support my children in the best way. Anyway, whilst there are many lovely posters on mumsnet, some are hurtful and agressive. No doubt this will be met with the usual nasty quips from some, but I don't care. One thing I have learnt is that everyone is entitled to stick up for themselves. I am not posting just because I was right. For indeed, had my ds been diagnosed with special needs, I still would have posted. That it was no way to be towards a mum in distress.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/preschool/1140182-Anyone-had-problems-with-pre-school-I-think-they-are-trying-to-label-my-son-as-autistic

working9while5 despite being in special ed at school, my husband is now a professor listed in Who'sWho, who has published more scientific papers than I've had hot dinners. Society needs people like him. unlike lazy lay about me :o

lisaro

and newspapers.

That was a hair dye that went wrong!!!

kladdkaka

your husband is now a professor listed in Who's Who

because he has the support of a good mumsnetter.

Behind every good man and all that.

I think, Valar, from my perspective it's because nearly a year ago, a thread here triggered stuff in this OP that she didn't really even know it had triggered iyswim?

It's not uncommon for this to happen around issues from people's pasts. It's also not uncommon for there to be anger and a desire to lash out and/or be lashed out at in these situations.

I don't think this thread has ever really been about AS. I think it's been about this OP's relationship with her mother and her experience of growing up loving someone with schizophrenia.

"Justified anger" at "rude and hurtful" comments?

I've read both threads now and have to say that you should really take on board the helpful advice which is STILL being given to you.

Oh that is brilliant Kladdkaka, I so hope some of the kids I work with get there. It's so hard to know where they're headed at secondary...

Yes working9while5 indeed it is. i have actually had counselling and in large have got to a good place. however it may be i need to work through more things

i always worry about my kids

thank you

Or you can fuck right off again.

Absolutely AlbertoFrog his asperger's may enable him to process complex sciencey stuff that makes regular brains bleed, but he is incapable of making his sandwiches for lunch.

(PS, it's just dawned on me, it's Friday, so are all the rest of you drunk??? Sober pregnant lady here )

Wow, working9while5, I "know" you from the SN boards. Congratulations!

I have to add, when I met my husband his car had a layer of grass growing on the roof. :o

I am due the same DAY as two other SN board MNers! How weird is it that we all probably conceived the same day ewwwww- ?

Must have been a quiet night on the boards.

That why you needed to source so many, erm, young and virile gardeners, Kladdaka?

Couldn't have been a Friday then.

It was the weekend...

(Saturday )

Sunday morning?

Phew

Weekend mornings are for sleeeeeeeep.

Good luck, w9w5, and very best wishes. You've given me (I know I'm unknown to you but I need to name-change frequently) very good advice over the last two years

Panda shit - how rude. Go and play on Facebook or something, the grown ups are talking.

OP - with all due respect, have you ever considered getting assessed for ASD yourself? I don't mean to offend, but it is hereditary and might explain some of your issues.

Time for a new change too, WinterisLeaving! Night night, thanks for the nice thoughts

Just read all 3hundredandsomething posts of the other thread and am pretty certain the use of the word "justified" in this title is, well, unjustified. Holding grudges for so long is unhealthy, I know, I've been there :( Some people just don't suit Internet fora.

I am glad I read it all though as I've been wondering about my DS for a while and will probably start my own thread soon.

Really kladdkaka that is very inspiring. My dd 4.10 years has AS traits and developmental delay and has a full statement at MS school, and is behind the others, though making so much progress in herself. I often worry what she will do as an adult, and will I have to look after her all her life, and that my Uni dreams for her have gone down the loo. I had SN at school, much the same thing as dd but no AS, and I have a good BA (hons) and an Msc in Health Psychology, so there is hope.