women who 'get on better with men'

[bejeezus]

I would have said this about myself into my 20's. I have 2 acquaintances who are women who 'get on better with men' 'have more male friends than female'

Neither of this women IMO have what it takes to be a good friend. They are both quite fickle and seem to lack empathy,I wouldnt trust them or rely on them. I can't really put my finger on what it is about them; they seem a bit fair-weather

On reflection, when I was younger I was less open and was probably emotionally immature (compared with peers) and didnt really have any great girl-friends when growing (not that I recognised). Since having made good female friends,that i do appreciate- there is nothing like it. I think girl-friend relationships are much deeper and enduring and there is nothing like it

Whats your experience of women who 'get on better with men'?
AIBU if I think they are a bit rubbish?

bejeezus are you basically saying then that all men are emotionally immature? And that women who don't fit into the socially acceptable mould of "female" are also emotionally immature?

That's interesting.

No I don't think that's what I am saying. I said that was true of my circumstances when I wad younger

I think there I'd more généralisation is going in the other direction-all women are bitchy and have nothing interesting to talk about

I'm interested in how you can dislike something that you are

I have realised through this thread that I think there is a distinction between women who might say 'most of my friends are men' (circumstantial/interests) and 'i get on better with men's (dislike women)

crunchy - no I definitely not saying all men are emotionally immature. Ive thought about it now; I have very close men-friends and our relationshisp are as deep as with my female friends. In fact the person I chose to be god-parent to my children is a man. I choose him because I admire his values and beliefs and I trust him completely with anything and everything

I am questioning why a women thinks 'other women' are not worthy of her friendship

I dont hold an opinion on what 'a socially acceptable model of a women is' and I certainly think that is being portrayed more by those who prefer men because women are bitchy and boring.

My female friends are incredibly diverse. They span many different cultures and 'social models' and I couldnt even begin to make generalisation of them. Apart from I love, respect and value them all and they make my life better

Ill shut up now

My personal experience of women who "get on better with men" is that they're attention-seeking, insecure and have past issues with women (e.g. bullying, mother issues). I actually often find them a caricature of the stereotypical woman they claim to dislike.

I guess there is a difference between saying 'I get on better with men' subtext 'I have a general problem with women and am unable to see them as individuals with their own personalities' (although I would treat 'I get on better with women' the same way, that if you think men are not individuals with their own personalities you are equally misguided)

and 'On looking at my friends I observe that they are mostly male' Subtext 'that it just so happens that the men I have met have more often had a personality that I match well with but if a woman matching that criteria walked in this minute I would almost certainly be friends with her too'

Or in other words some of us with more male than female friends just don't factor gender into it. We care about people not genitals.

bejeezus and entropy - yes, there is definitely a difference between those two IMO

I do dislike the pre occupation with weight that happens amongst some of my female friends

i want to talk about fun and interesting things, not obsess over the latest okay magazine and how thin each celebrity is

but i don't judge my dear friends for that. they are fabulous and interesting women

that is the result of a capitalist society and a powerful beauty industry (mostly run by men i might add)

Of the handful of people I consider my 'best friends', the majority are men. I don't consider this to be because I "get on better with men". I consider this to be a matter of chance - I haven't met very many women I have 'clicked' with and more men that I have 'clicked' with. They are all people, doesn't matter about their gender. Though I admit to having moments of feministy-angst when I feel as though I should have more female friends.

I expect someone has said something like this more eloquently than me further up, I haven't read the whole thread, sorry.

Not all women are into talking about weight, shoes, etc. I am certainly not. As a teenage girl most of my friends were boys as most of the teenage girls I knew only wanted to talk about stuff like this. As an adult woman though I have met many women who want to talk about more interesting stuff - to me at least.

My friends are all female. There are men I get on with at work and in other settings but they are not confidantes or people I could call on in a crisis. I also get on well with a lot of my husband's friends. None of my female friends are bitchy or weight obsessed.

I agree with the OP. I personally think that some women who purposefully seek out male friends and don't want to be friends with other women are often attention seekers and enjoy flirting with men under the guise of "friendship".

"My personal experience of women who "get on better with men" is that they're attention-seeking, insecure and have past issues with women"

this is all getting a bit harsh. I get on better with men because they're what I'm used to - I grew up with three brothers (no sisters) and male cousins living with us. I wouldn't say it's because I'm attention-seeking, insecure and have past issues with women. LOTS of judginess and nastiness going on on this thread.

I think men and women can conform to social norms expected by them - men at pub talking about cars, sex and what nags their wives are/women at home talking about shoes, weight and how rubbish their husbands are. Either of these is boring, isn't it?

I haven't read the whole thread so I'm sorry if someone else has said this already:

Aren't we genetically programmed to 'get on better with men' until we reproduce? Once that urge has been settled, we move into 'nurturing' and are genetically programmed to search out other nurturers to bond with.

Aren't we genetically programmed to 'get on better with men' until we reproduce? Once that urge has been settled, we move into 'nurturing' and are genetically programmed to search out other nurturers to bond with

Oooooooo...interesting!

"Aren't we genetically programmed to 'get on better with men' until we reproduce?"

I don't know, are we? There seem to be a lot of women ignoring their programming if so.

There will always be exceptions to every rule!

I'm not entirely sure that it is a rule ...

Oh lordie here we go. It was a theory, but the phrase 'exceptions that prove every rule' is just a phrase that I used to indicate that my theory might not apply to every female on the planet. Sorry for not being specific enough.

Ah, I see. So women being "genetically programmed to 'get on better with men' until we reproduce. Once that urge has been settled, we move into 'nurturing' and are genetically programmed to search out other nurturers to bond with" is a theory of yours that "might not apply to every female on the planet".

Obviously it doesn't apply to every female on the planet for a start, or even close to that. Also the initial way you stated it was almost as factual, or as a well known theory. I'd like to see more information when posters go around stating stuff like this, that's all.

I prefer mens' company. I find men generally talk about more interesting things and do not constantly bang on about their children or bitch about each other. I find men less hard work and easier company.

Two days running i have been on the "school train" to work. Once day I was sitting in a carriage with a lot of boys who were talking about science, Sherlock Holmes and how they thought the film would compare with the book & TV series. Today I sat alongside a bunch of girls who spent the journey slagging off other girls. Sums it up really

NIGEL

but that doesnt apply to adults

I much prefer the company of men and my closest friendships have always been with men.
It gets harder and harder to have platonic male friends as you get older because once they partner up the wives/partners put the kybosh on it.