to think this situation's 'resolution' is completely unfair?

[LearnerInLife]

My son who is 17 is gay. When people chat about their children in the office, I do so about my son and his younger sister. I've mentioned my son's boyfriend in conversation briefly. I've mentioned some bullying he got at school and how we dealt with it. I've mentioned how next year we're giving him permission to go to Pride because we think he's old enough now. I also talk about my daughter's activities and friends just as much. I talk about my son's school work, friends and activities too. Talking about my son within the context of him being gay has been no more than any other member of my office talking about their children's sexuality in the context of their boyfriends, girlfriends, dates etc. This chat does not go on all the time nor does it impede work. It will be while a few of us have our coffee break together etc.

One woman who has recently joined my office told me that she can't believe I'm so blase about my son 'being a homosexual and engaging in that type of behaviour'. She has also has told me that I'm an irresponsible parent for allowing him to go to Pride because 'goodness knows what he could get up to and surely you have to think of your daughter.' She has quoted scriptures at me and yesterday gave me a card that basically said that if he carried on in this course my son was going to hell and I would be to blame! Oh, and that she'd pray for me! Throughout all of this I have kept civil with her. I tried reasoning with her. I then said that we obviously would not agree but that I was as proud of my son as my daughter and would carry on being so. I made a point of trying not to be obnoxious and 'rub it in her face' to make a point but still not, when talking to the others, to change my behaviour or suddenly act as if I should be ashamed of him and talk differently. Every single member of the office has rolled their eyes at me when she has insisted on carrying on with her behaviour or has actually spoken to me in a "WHAT is her problem?" type of way.

Anyway, my boss approached me today. This woman had complained to him that I was 'inflicting my views upon her' and that she was being made to feel uncomfortable. My boss asked me to not mention my son in office conversation anymore. I asked him if he was going to make that rule for all or just me. His reaction was that I was being 'over-sensitive and should try to be more accommodating of others' beliefs.' He then had to rush off to a meeting so I didn't see him again today. We have the bank holiday and so I have until Tuesday to think of what I want to say as I feel I need to talk to him more and stress my firm objections to the way he is handling this. AIBU?

If she were not allowed to talk about it, then the thread would be pulled.

Lays face it, we've been suckered. There will be no update because the story, told from one side only, may have become a teensy bit altered/exaggerated in the telling. It's a great way to encourage people to associate Christianity in general with bigotry.

It is however very useful at pointing out what a mess the current Equalities law is, when two potentially incompatible, but equally protected, rights come into collision.

The answer, if I were the manager here, would be to tell everyone to shut up and do their job.

Oh dear Edith! I don't believe that to be the case at all. There should be protection for religious people but you shouldn't be allowed to foist it in others

Or declare yourself better than another, which in essence she has. And I am religious, I have just returned from church.

It's a great way to encourage people to associate Christianity in general with bigotry.

Au contraire, Edith. It has demonstrably encouraged Christians here to dissociate themselves from the Christian colleague's remarks, and so prove that Christianity is not synonymous with bigotry, and all power to their elbow, say I! (a committed atheist).

Mind you, you obviously have a point that we have only heard one side...

jacksmania, you LEGEND

I don't think both are equally protected, though Edith. Because the offending woman wasn't in any way being prevented from practising her religion, nor was she being discriminated against - she was the one forcing her religious beliefs on another person, which she is not allowed to do under these circumstances.

So if you, as a manager, did what you suggested, you would, as much as the boss in question in the OP, be contravening the Equalities Act or whatever the heck it's called these days.

Thanks Grim! :o

It does seem that we're not going to get an update though. Hmmm.

Thumbwitch is right Edith. It's a basic rule of equalities law that you can't use your protected status to discriminate against someone else. The right to be the thing is equally protected (i.e. be gay, be Christian), but no one is allowed to justify behaviour that is discriminatory by simply calling it a manifestation of their, for example, religion.

Last call for an update, LearnerInLife? :)