to be sad with some peoples unenthusiasm for christmas??

[covermeup]

I'm so tired of hearing people say 'it's just another day of the year' 'we won't be changing our normal daily routine' 'we can't be bothered to buy each other gifts' etc etc. Christmas is the one day of the year where you buy gifts for the people you care about to show them they are loved and appreciated!!! It makes me so sad that some people aren't bothered about seeing their family, having a nice dinner, playing some games and opening gifts for ONE day of the year!!

I know some people genuinely can't afford presents but all of the people that I know who moan about the money can! EVERYBODY knows Christmas is going to come around in December so why wait until the week before and then panic?! If every couple put away £20/£30 a month from January - November they would then have £220/£330 for Christmas! Most people wouldn't even notice the moneys gone!

It's sad that we won't be seeing DNeph (14mo) opening his present because Sil only wants to go to her inlaws for lunch and then spend the rest of the day at home by themselves. And Mil is only buying gifts for her 2 grandchildren because she's left it too late she thinks it's 'just another day of the year' and nobody else needs a gift.

I sound like a right whingebag reading that back but I genuinely LOVE christmas and love choosing gifts for everyone I care about and spoiling my DP and all the kids and I love seeing all the smiles on everyones faces on Christmas Day. Makes me feel all warm and gooey inside :)

YABU. It's not the one day of the year where I buy gifts for the people I care about. Neither is it the one day of the year when we get together as a family for a nice dinner and to play games.

That's me, no enthusiasm

I wish I could be like you. How can I? I feel awful for my poor DS. Any tips for getting the Christmas spirit?

I am Expecting my first baby in Jan, so in preparation for next years big Christmas, this years is a quiet, cheapie presents and no tree affair and I could not care less

It's personal; people's views on things can be shaped by childhood events or just an overwhelming sense that everything's become so commercialised. Your post reads to me as if the gifts are all important... I don't feel the same way as you do.

Some people are really struggling financially at the moment and I'd keep my thoughts to an idle vent here rather than risk offending somebody at sounding so smug at my good fortune.

Enjoy your Christmas in your way and don't judge others for 'enjoying' it their way or just getting through the day.

Yabu!

People are cutting back. Excuses are being given. It's only one day, why all the excess? Kids are happy enough with a token gift

YABU - it is only a great day for people if they have a family history of lovely Christmases. I love it (but all my childhood Christmases were idyllic - no money but loads of love), but a friend hates it for almost the opposite reasons. Just do your own thing and enjoy your day.

Op.... You sound grabby!

you want Christmas your way and object when SIL wants Christmas her way

okaaaaaaaay

Yabu! You think Christmas is about buying gifts? ? You've got it so wrong I don't know where to begin.

You are an advertiser's wet dream.

i am lol at the irony here! so glad the materialism of christmas makes you feel all warm and gooey inside.

Should of said in my post that I'm not at all financially well off and I do not spend loads of money on christmas. Most people just get one or two small gifts. With all the offers around at the moment, BOGOF, 3for2's, etc, it's easy to shop around and buy great gifts without spending a lot.

Kladdkaka You're right, it isn't the only day of the year I do those things either, I was just saying that the people I'm referring to don't ever do it so one day a year shouldn't be difficult!

And yes I know a lot of people have their own reasons for not enjoying Christmas as much but I am only referring to a select few people that I know. I'm not judging anybody I don't know!

YABU. Why should I have to feel the same way as you, or anyone else that really gets into it? This is what really bugs me about Christmas. I don't have anything against it, I just don't get excited about it. This year in particular has been very hard, stressful, upsetting - I just don't particularly feel like getting into party mode.

So tell me - why do I have to fall in line with the way other people feel?? Why do other people feel it's OK to impose what they feel and they want upon me? Why do I get chastised as being miserable because I don't feel like watching carol singers or getting myself paralytic at work Christmas parties, which actually - I don't even really want to go to?

It feels forced upon me, which makes me dig my heels in even further. And it's not even about the present-giving commercialism of it all. The argument that this is the time of year to spend time with family just doesn't wash. If you care about spending time together that much, you really shouldn't need a dedicated day to do that.

*You being the generic you, not OP.

YABU! Bah Humbug!

YABU, you want it your way and you're upset that MIL isn't getting you a present. We haven't bought adult presents for the last few years, only presents for the gilrs and we still manage to love it. Christmas isn't all about presents and other material things, for me its 2 weeks off work spending time with my family.

OP... Some people are living hand to mouth... 3for2's, BOGOFs and the like are not an option for them.

Think before engaging your fingers because you're really like to cause offence and I can see that you don't mean to, you're just bubbling over with the thought of your lovely Christmas to come. Try not to be so tactless.

... All of that can change in the wink of an eye, people can lose anything at anytime and this country is in recession.

You sound like an absolute fucking nightmare.
Why do you translate your SIL not wanting to see you as lack of enthusiasm? Maybe she is really looking forward to her quiet family Christmas.
And if you thing that BOGOF and things means that getting presents is 'cheap' then you've never really been skint. When you've barely any money for food, then buying a boots gift set for an over-entitles adult relative is hardly a priority.

I'm not materilistic. If I buy gifts for other people, I don't expect them back. Christmas isn't about the gifts for me at all, it's about spending time with family and being happy. I just love buying gifts for people to see the smile on their face. I'm not upset that Mil isn't buying me a present, I'm upset about her attitude to Christmas. She has no reason to not enjoy spending time with her family who adore her.

That's not what you said in your OP, covermeup. You made the point about MIL buying only for her 2 grandchildren. What did you mean then?

If your MIL doesn't enjoy spending time with you and your family... maybe there's a reason for that? The way you came across in your OP, I wouldn't want to spend time with you either, you sounded terribly earnest about the gift giving and the way things should be done.

You're still talking about gifts... you love buying them. What if you couldn't? Woudl it take the shine off for you?

YABU

I absolutely love Christmas...it's my 'thing' and always has been.

However, I fully understand that it's often a sad/stressful/worrying time of year for some people.

I know at least 3 Mums and 1 Dad who are worried about the amount of alcohol their DP will drink...and they'll spend the entire festive period treading on egg shells.

I know other people who (as Lying said) are literally living hand to mouth and can't afford to put anything by for Christmas.

I know (far too many) separated families whose Christmas will be torn apart by arguments over 'who gets the kids' on Christmas day.

Others will have been bereaved and this time of year makes them miss their loved ones even more

So as much as I love Christmas, I fully understand why it fills some people with dread.

Your MIL and SIL sound like my kind of people!

I love buying presents and having time with family but object to the pressures and all out commercialism at this time of year.

"It feels forced upon me, which makes me dig my heels in even further." - I agree with Humanfly

TBH I feel shit about christmas this year, in fact I feel guilty even buying presents when so many people will have nothing.

It says it all when the shops are literally piled up with stuff because people just aren't buying, even our supermarkets have boxes of chrismas food piled up on the floors. So many people have lost their jobs this year, it's horrendous

you're backtracking! your op equates christmas spirit with presents with a whole paragraph about money.

YABU. I have no interest in Xmas this year. I have gone through the motions and bought presents and food. My husband bought a tree. But I am just not interested. We have a bunch of relatives coming over to us so I will put on a smile and go through the motions but I would rather be out of the country in a place that doesn't celebrate Xmas. It's great that you are looking forward to it, but don't judge others who aren't. My reason is that I am terribly sad about not being able to get pregnant. As the Xmas focus is so much on children, it just brings it home how empty ours will see as we are childless for another one.

I can't think why your SIL is looking forward to a quiet Christmas at home with just her family...