to ask you not to buy Christmas presents for teachers.

[Crabapple99]

I have seen several threads on the topic, so want to give my point of view and experiences.

1. Many staff are not allowed to accept a gift above a certain value ( £3 in my school) so these big gifts, especially class gifts, leave staff in a very difficult situation, causing all sorts of paperwork and recording, and leaving us open to accusations of favouratitsm from families, and other allegations

1. Many staff don't want gifts, quite often the item is unwanted, even edibles, if the box is big, heavy, and we already have too much to eat over christams. It is also embarrassing to have to accept.

1. Many staff worry about the reason for the gift, especially if it seems some pupils and their parents feel pressure to keep up: I've been given gifts in the past that when I know the family can't afford even a couple of pounds, it makes me feel terrible. I've had gifts in the past which I suspected were stolen, which makes me feel worse.

1. I don't really think there is a problem with Christmas cards, but even then, as someone who could easiluy have 300 pupils on my timetable, even then that can get a bit overwelming, not to say meaningless.

1. A very small token, such as one of those tiney boxes from thornton's with just two chocolates in, is a nice way of acknoledging when a teacher has really gone above and beond, for your child, but even that is unnessesary rreally.

Hope I'm not coming across as a scrooge! I love christams, but dread this aspect of it.

Ponty, the teacher will not care at all, but your child may feel upset. Could you and your child make something? Stick a candle & pine cone in a flattened lump of home made playdoh, paint and glitter it?

I have NEVER worked in a school where gifts are thrown away - that is disgusting behaviour and purely a reflection on that particular staff.

I would hate for parents to think their good will and money spent would be binned like that. At the worst if I really disliked a gift I would give it to charity so that it wasn't wasted.

The best presents are the one children have made themselves or the cards where parents have taken the time to write a word about their child's progress etc.

I still remember one year when twin boys I had in my class - really rough and tough boys (Not the 'I love you Mrs Bells' sort) gave me a pair or mugs. The mugs themselves were nice (still have them) but what really made it was that they were wrapped in terribly crumpled paper with about 10m of sellotape on each. When the mum gave them to me she said 'they wanted to wrap them themselves'

Oh and if in doubt a small book token is always gratefully received.

Ponty - a homemade card from your dd would be perfect.

I agree with those who have said this is an odd thread. I'm a teacher and I'd rather you didnt presume what I think and speak on my behalf

I like recieving presents (price is irrelevant as is what it is) as it means I must be appreciated however it doesnt register on any level who doesnt get me a present.

Tbh the nicest thing to get for me is a homemade card by child.

Ponty I would love a homemade card from your DD. I'd be mortified if I thought you'd bought a present when you couldn't really afford it to keep up with the other parents.

I have a box with homemade cards, pictures, letters and notes that children have given me. I don't throw any of them away. When I was doing my teacher training I had a card from some year 6 girls that listed my best teacher attributes: kind, funny, helpful, clever and pretty! From year 6 girls that was a coup, I can tell you and it's still in there!

Just a "Merry Christmas and a thank you for all your hard work so far this year, DD loves being in your class". Is enough!

Aw Folk thats lovely that you have a box with all the homemade cards and presents in.
A good teacher really stays in your mind forever.

This thread is ridiculous. I am a teacher. I work my bottom off all year for little reward and nothing pleases me more than for my students to acknowledge that. Whether they want to acknowledge that by giving me a present, a card, a 'thank you' or a smile - or nothing at all does not matter in the slightest. Of course I would never throw any of it away or wish I hadn't received it. And as for judging people who do/don't give me presents - wtf? That's like judging someone because of the colour of their skin! I have never - and hope I will never come across anyone - let alone a teacher who does this!
I am usually on my knees with exhaustion by Christmas so a bit of kindness, however it is demonstrated, gift or not, goes a long way!
Please don't think OP is expressing the views of the majority!

Awww

teacher is indeed lovely, and very good. DD is bright (but not G&T) esp in reading. Prev teacher didnt really notice and wouldnt let her read anything but bloody Biff books. Meant that DD lost interest and started to play up. She would also tell DD that she HAD to work at the same speed as the others in the class, so dd got bored and started saying she 'couldn't be bothered' with school. It also made for some low level bullying from kids in her class who would make fun of her if teacher told her off (which she did, a lot)

Within a week of yr2 new teacher had spoken to yr 5 teacher and DD was allowed to join their reading. She is sooo much happier and has made some lovely older friends; she is also now a free reader. Such a simple thing has meant that DD is much much better at school, happier, confident and takes full part in everything. She hasn't been told off once this year.

I this teacher!

(I do think I should bath stinky shells though, that can be tonights task)

Do you teach in the UK OP?

I find your posts rather strange (bin, skip, paying contributions to take gifts home) I've never experienced anything like it.

Not over keen on gifts here myself but when I get given them they are certainly accepted with good grace.

Here the children have two main teachers & that´s who presents are bought for.

All parents give 50cts per teacher & one present/voucher is given from the class.

I'm a teacher too and I love all the things I'm given! Yes, sometimes mugs may end up in the staff room- but it's lovely if the child sees you use it. And sometimes non drinkers get wine and allergy sufferers get bubble bath, but I have never heard anyone be other than really grateful. I've never ever heard of a gift bin or gift shelf or applying to get gifts back, an no primary I have ever been in would through stuff out that could be used for fetes etc. Actually, as a teacher, I seriously think the op is making it all up, it is so opposite to my experience.

Do you not think that all your post has managed to do is possibly upset parents who now wonder if their gifts are in the bin, or unwanted and dismissed?
Or that their efforts to show a little appreciation are seen as embarrassing and meaningless?
Happy Christmas.

LtEve my DD had a similar teacher.
DD really struggled in R and went into YR1 barely being able to write or read. Her YR1 teacher was AMAZING. They knew how much me & DD loved them as I told them all the time . Really couldn't afford a present for them at Christmas so DD drew a picture for them. They were chuffed to bits with it.

OP's tales smell fishier than the seashells, IMHO.

My DCs always make a little something for their teachers at Christmas. The teachers (at 2 different schools) usually send a thank you card in the new year. I doubt they would do that if they had thrown away the present.
I am a nursery nurse, and really appreciate Christmas cards "signed" by my 2 year olds. If nothing else, it shows that parents have taken a little time to encourage their child to write

LtEveDallas, I bet my ds's shells were stinkier. He collected them from a creek behind our house. I wasn't paying enough attention, didn't clue in that they were alive! They did catch my attention weeks later when a horrendous stench permeated the livingroom. Did not take me long to locate the source: his sand bucket behind the bar, with the now dead mussels.

When I was teaching, in secondary, any present was gratefully received, either from my tutor group, or my sixth formers, or anyone in between. I use the mugs, ate the chocolates, use the keyrings and have the ornaments on display.

I'm a class rep this year and the tradition seems to be to collect money from parents and buy a decentish present now and at the end of the year. I do feel that large presents are not needed, as after all, the teachers are paid, but a little token of appreciation is always nice, and acknowledges that teachers (year 11 tutor in my ds's tutors case) do have extra pressures.

We have never given a teacher a present, why would we?

The teachers at my sons school are great and I do see people bringing in gifts at the end of term Christmas etc but I would never get them a gift.

My son has never even mentioned taking in a gift.

Lots of people work hard all year and never get gifts.

I think having 2 -3 weeks off at that time of year is a great gift that I would love.

[but please do not turn this into a school hols/teacher thread as I am past caring what the teachers do or don't get]

YABU and really quite bossy!

I don't give teachers gifts at Christmas (I do at the end of the academic year though). My choice, and I have my reasons - DC have never questioned it. I wouldn't dream of thinking everyone should do the same though, or that all teachers (as a teacher myself - I know they don't!) thought the same way about it! How odd!

I'm a parent and not a teacher. Kids like to express their gratitide and I believe teachers, or anybody for that matter, will happily receive it.

This thread has a Bah Humbug feel about it.

Well I will be leaving a bottle of champagne for dd's tutor (at secondary school)
She goes beyond the call of duty and it's my way of saying thankyou for all your conern and support.
Ds's tutor will not be getting one as she has difficulty looking me in the eye and has the personality of a corpse.

YABU. DH is a primary teacher - he LOVES getting cards etc from his class & saves them each year.

He also appreciates every gift; usually tie or cufflinks which he always wears, or chocolates, which I particularly love because he shares

Can't believe some gifts end up in a skip in one school. That's actually a bit upsetting.

You can't win. On most teacher present threads half the posts are "why should we give presents, they're just doing their job", "I can't afford it but feel under pressure", "surely teachers can't accept that sort of thing"...grumble grumble grumble.

A teacher posts and says don't buy us presents and still the grumbling.

Ninky Possibly its to do with the sentiment behind it. No of course no-one sshould feel like have to give presents but at the same time lots of children want to send in a present (homemade or otherwise) and if they do, then the thought that the recipient feels like OP, well it just leaves a nasty taste in the mouth.