to ask you not to buy Christmas presents for teachers.

[Crabapple99]

I have seen several threads on the topic, so want to give my point of view and experiences.

1. Many staff are not allowed to accept a gift above a certain value ( £3 in my school) so these big gifts, especially class gifts, leave staff in a very difficult situation, causing all sorts of paperwork and recording, and leaving us open to accusations of favouratitsm from families, and other allegations

1. Many staff don't want gifts, quite often the item is unwanted, even edibles, if the box is big, heavy, and we already have too much to eat over christams. It is also embarrassing to have to accept.

1. Many staff worry about the reason for the gift, especially if it seems some pupils and their parents feel pressure to keep up: I've been given gifts in the past that when I know the family can't afford even a couple of pounds, it makes me feel terrible. I've had gifts in the past which I suspected were stolen, which makes me feel worse.

1. I don't really think there is a problem with Christmas cards, but even then, as someone who could easiluy have 300 pupils on my timetable, even then that can get a bit overwelming, not to say meaningless.

1. A very small token, such as one of those tiney boxes from thornton's with just two chocolates in, is a nice way of acknoledging when a teacher has really gone above and beond, for your child, but even that is unnessesary rreally.

Hope I'm not coming across as a scrooge! I love christams, but dread this aspect of it.

belgo we hand in around £25 per year to the kitty. Then the class rep sorts out xmas gift (vouchers), Easter egg, and end of term flowers.
Plus small amount left over for incidentals.
I'm only too happy to be spared the faff.

That is a lot of money. I'm glad we don't have any pressure to do that.

YABU

I've always given my children's teachers bloody lovely presents, like really tasteful flowers, or Accessorize vouchers. Last year we (parents) clubbed together and bought ds's teacher £50 of M&S vouchers.

I don't think for one minute they don't appreciate them.

I think my kids teachers work INCREDIBLY hard and I want to treat them a bit at Christmas. I don't appreciate being told I shouldn't.

As a teacher the OP has made me sad to think that parents could be worried that this happens to their presents. I have worked in a variety of schools and have never seen or heard of such practices. Personally, I like the presents I have received and was thankful for them. I have never had anything huge but in my study is a box of cards which I have been sent at christmas and end of year, I have never thrown them away. I have lots of teacher mugs in my cupboard and teacher ornaments. I keep them all because I like the spirit in which they were given.

One of my favourites is a little ornament cat that a child in my class painted because he knew I like cats. Just lovely to receive. In the same way, I hope that presents I give my class at christmas, easter and end of term are well received. Ie end of term I have bought t-shirts and paints and children have made their own, or I made photo frames. Would the OP assume they were put in the bin by a parent?

Well seeing as all the actual teachers have disagreed with the op's sentiments, I think we can safely ignore them especially as she isn't actually a teacher

What career are you planning next op?

well, DD1's year 1 teacher is fabulous and does things, probably like most teachers, way beyond the call of duty. She does bookclub for instance after school and her enthusiasm for books is contagious. It's cool to go to bookclub

Anyway, she's in her 20s, and not sure what she would like, so may get her some vouchers. Book tokens maybe

I'm with you OP. Anyone over the age of 35 knows this is just a fairly recent attempt to get people to buy more - never used to be common practise.

The only exception would be private schools where the parents were doing their bit to share a bit of Christmas joy with the lowly paid teachers. Happy to gift bin men, milkmen, postmen etc get gifts. Traditional to show appreciation for their low paid, hard work that makes my life easier.

Happy to give a teacher a card. Not spending £5 twice a year. As much as a teacher wants a class worth of free wine and choc' s I bet the TA's would apprciate it more.As for homemade stuff...really? Yuck.

Perhaps a dictonary would be a good idea for a gift crabapple?? really bad spelling for a teacher

I send a "hamper" into the staffroom at my kids school so that the TAs/secretaries/parent helpers as well as teachers, get a token of appreciation. It tends to be mince pies/christmas cake, flavoured syrup for coffee, mini marshmallows & spray cream for hot choc.

"Hope I'm not coming across as a scrooge"

Well, you are a bit. Come on OP ...snap out of it, or maybe you'll get a visit from the three ghosts. And they will shock you into seeing sense the hard way.

I usually give a small box of chocs to my DS teacher & will continue to do so, am assuming they can have a pile in the staffroom & therefore a reasonable supply of chocs for coffee for a while.

Used to work in care and we loved the boxes of chocs that were gifted at christmas and kept us going for a few weeks days

nothingold isagree. I'm over 35 and can remember giving my teachers homemade cards and presents. Saw my old headmaster last year (long since retired) and he has kept all his cards etc as they hold such nice memories.
I think the only "new" thing is this idea of putting £20 in a year so that someone/Class rep can buy a larger present. I don't like this at at all. Parents/children should be able to choose which teachers they would like to give presents to. Surely giving £20 at the beginning of term to cover everything kind of defeats the point?

Disagree

I'm thinking of making a big box of nigella's fudge and sending it in with some sweetie bags so it can go in the staff room and the teachers help themselves.

i worked in a school and i can say that the teachers were very happy to receive gifts. in the staff room they would show off a home made card or share round chocs it was a very happy and grateful time at the school.

I think it's always good to be able to RECEIVE.

And do it graciously.

You see ... I sure got the Xmas spirit in me today!

I will just mention, that some people can't receive ... and it's a real heart sink when your giving is not received - especially for kids.

Wouldn't it be fun if we could all have careers like Crabapple and have different professions every week

I'd like to be a zookeeper next week...

I fancy a job in a jelly tots quality control department.

How ungrateful
I'm horrified that a teacher, supposedly a caring profession cannot see the sentiment behind the giving of a present

My mum teaches secondary, and every year after we have opened our presents, she opens hers from the children. It's lovely, and actually quite emotional when you read some of the cards.

Crabapple99 isn't a teacher, witherhills.

YABU as it's none of your business who or what people buy for and it may only be your school that throw things in the bin - which IMO is very ungrateful as it could be given to the needy at Christmas instead. Maybe you should send a letter out to you pupils not to buy you stuff instead.

More than that, I'm glad you aren't teaching my DD as your spelling is disgraceful.

Missed the post where it says they aren't a teacher.

Well the teachers she are talking about are ungrateful then.
I can't actually believe that teachers in 2 schools would just disregard presents like that.

I love receiving gifts and am always grateful. Okay, most of the chocolate gets given away to family at Christmas, but that doesn't mean I wasn't pleased to receive it. And I love getting booze!

Equally, though, I don't keep track of who hasn't bought me a gift: presents are a bonus, not something I would expect.

I can't actually believe that teachers in 2 schools would just disregard presents like that.

Yes, exactly - hard to believe, isn't it.

Qualified pathologust thread for MorelliOrRanger.