Wearing rings - but not married

[YonderRevoltingPeasantWhoIsHe]

Gah, it's too late to type out a proper question. Recently, an unmarried couple, friends of ours, bought 'wedding rings' to wear. They have no intention of marrying.

What do you think of this - is it like 'playing married' or just a nice sign that they are both 'taken'?

"And why borrow something so associated with marriage to signify commitment?"

Um, as far as I am concerned marriage is a symbol of commitment. I would think that as marriage has historically been the most recognised way to demonstrate commitment it is the obvious choice from which to borrow symbols of commitment.

Once again, I think our difference of opinion is probably influenced by our differing experiences of marriage. In the UK it is far more intrinsically linked with legality where as here you can be unmarried with all ties if you want to so marriage is far more of a symbolic choice rather than a financial/legal arrangement. I'm not making a judgement call here on the pros/cons of common-law marriage btw - just pointing out that it changes the way we might view marriage.

"We don't have common law arrangements in the UK because of freedom of choice issues. Why on earth should anybody be considered married just because they live together?'

I have to say I see it a bit differently. Here it is called a "defacto" relationship and I would not say that people in this arrangement are "considered married". The law, however, recognises that after a certain period of living together (1 year here) your financial interests become intertwined and this can be further complicated if there are children involved, common property etc. So the point is to make sure that people don't end up getting screwed financially. If you DON'T want to be covered by those laws but you do want to love together you just sign a document saying you agree to remain financially separate.

It's just a different way of managing things - it really isn't too problematic IME.

Bubbaluv what country are you in?

I'm in Australia Jasper.

interesting, Bubs. No such thing in the UK but people here STILL believe the myth that after a certain period living with a partner you acquire rights as if you were married.

I don't see the point of people who don't belive in marriage using the terms or the acts. My mom wears a wedding ring and calls her boyfriend husband.. she wants to get married. but i dont think he's too keen. It's a bit sad.

My cousin says she thinks people dont need the paper and marriage is stupid etc, but refers to her boyfriend as her husband.

Either get married or don't but don't sneer at marriage whilst pretending to be married

Yeah, I don't agree with an automatic provision of common-law marriage rights if there is no way of opting out, but nor do I think people should be forced to marry to be covered by the most sensible system of managing the legal complexities involved in a long-term live-in relationship.

I think the automatic safety net with an option to opt-out is a sensible compromise.

I'm married and I never wear my wedding ring, don't like wearing rings so I don't. If they want to do this I think it's quite sweet