Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think some women don't like other women because they are pretty?

400 replies

RainbowSheep · 07/12/2011 20:48

I really struggled with this at school, girls didn't like me much and I could never work out why, looking back it is because I was very pretty (I'm not syaing I'm better than anyone else or the most beautiful woman in the world btw). I did have some very good girlfriends but was never accepted into groups of girls. I found this a lot throughout my life and it used to really get me down.

I have noticed it reared it's head at the school gates again, it has taken me a good few years to be accepted by the other mums, being shy doesn't help either.

AIBU to think this is something that often women (obvioulsy not all women!) don't like other women who they think are pretty??

OP posts:
Hassledge · 07/12/2011 22:45

She has got a ferrity face, though.

And yes, beauty/prettiness can be measured. I read it in Time magazine 100 years ago so it must be true. The one from Charlie's Angels (not Kate, not Farrah, the other one - long hair, brunette) was the perfect woman in terms of a symmetrical face, distances between nose and mouth, distance between eyes etc.

Youllbewaiting · 07/12/2011 22:46

I've been with female friends they've been talking about someone being pretty, and all the men have not agreed with them.

The one off sex in the city being an example.

Esta3GG · 07/12/2011 22:46

Jaclyn Smith

sfxmum · 07/12/2011 22:47

funnily enough there are loads and loads of men who think they are dead attractive to women (not true for quite a lot of them)

sorry off point

JamieComeHome · 07/12/2011 22:47

No - (can't believe I am defending MB) - he is saying (in theory) there are women who other women generally agree to be attractive and are therefore jealous of, on the grounds that their DHs might fancy them . However, the same women are not deemed to be attractive by most men, and therefore, the jealousy is mis-placed

I give you - Jennifer Aniston

HexagonalQueenOfTheSummer · 07/12/2011 22:48

I used to be at college with a girl who said she had that problem and that "everyone hated her because she was beautiful" but I soon found out it was her arrogance and self obsessed vanity that was the reason. She was pretty, but no prettier than lots of other girls on our course. Twenty years later she has just added me to FB and she is looking like a drag queen not as pretty now.

JollySergeantJackrum · 07/12/2011 22:50

I agree with JamieComeHome about MB's point. I think Stana Katic is very pretty but DP says she looks like man-ish.

ElderberrySyrup · 07/12/2011 22:51

oh MoreBeta

Think about what you've said there. Really think about it

Wink
droves · 07/12/2011 22:52

Davey ...no . Some things I never wear .

Hot pants ...no
Bikinis ...no
Short skirts ...no
Crop tops ....gawd no .

I prefer practical clothing . I dont need to show flesh ..

Hassledge · 07/12/2011 22:52

Jaclyn Smith - thank you.

sfxmum · 07/12/2011 22:53

so he does not mean pretty so much as attractive to men, I see

re Jen Aniston not sure women think men find her attractive more like a type of woman wants to be her or look like her, not quite the same

(such fluffy talk and not even the weekend)

Get0rf · 07/12/2011 22:56

Oh don't shout at beta, he is lovely Grin

Mind you, you are talking gubbins. I am rather well groomed, and don't do it to get men to notice me, I would much rather the approbation of women rather then men. If a woman says 'you are looking good' it means so much more than if a man days it, tbh.

JamieComeHome · 07/12/2011 23:01

I am too.

I agree about the approbation of women. It's easy to get men to fancy you

MoreBeta · 07/12/2011 23:06

JamieComeHome - yes you get it. That is exactly what I meant. Grin

There are so many women on TV (actresses, slebs) who are often described by other women as gorgeous. They really are not.

There are so many ordinary women who are far far more attractive.

LEttletownofBOFlehem · 07/12/2011 23:08

But they ARE gorgeous, to women! That counts, you know...

JeremyVile · 07/12/2011 23:10

"JamieComeHome - yes you get it. That is exactly what I meant."

I will now go on to demonstrate that that is NOT exactly what I meant....behold!

MoreBeta · 07/12/2011 23:11

" It's easy to get men to fancy you"

No, no. Trust me. Its really complicated.

TerraNotSoFirma · 07/12/2011 23:13

I got what you meant Morebeta

Get0rf · 07/12/2011 23:14

I think Sarah Jessica Parker is a good example.

Lots of women think she is stunning - I do, she is well groomed, comes across as very charming, and is beautiful in my eyes (lovely hair, good bone structure, a stunning smile and laugh, and she has got HER OWN NOSE which suits her).

There have been loads of articles about the fact that she is a woman who women find attractive, but men don't.

Does that fucking matter? No. Just because more women than men think she is beautiful, it doesn't mean that women's opinions are somehow lesser than a man's.

Whatmeworry · 07/12/2011 23:16

I think what MoreBeta is trying to say is that there is no point in hating each other for what they see or don't see as pretty as evolutionarily its irrelevant as they ain't going to have each others babies.

I also agree its easy to get men to fancy you - but its not so easy to get them to fancy you the next morning and thereafter

MillyR · 07/12/2011 23:17

I think maybe there is some sort of division between striking, pretty, beautiful and attractive when looking at both men and women. SJP is probably striking rather than pretty.

Whatmeworry · 07/12/2011 23:17

"in hating" - "in women hating"

JeremyVile · 07/12/2011 23:18

I am perfectly able to assesss whether another woman is, imo, pretty/attractive/hot/beautiful/intriguing/whatever without taking into consideration whether or not some random bloke would like to fuck her.

Whatmeworry · 07/12/2011 23:18

I give you - Jennifer Aniston

DH preferred Phoebe.....

Swipe left for the next trending thread