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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to be irritated by this mum at DD's school? (Nativity play related)

166 replies

sloppyguiseppe · 05/12/2011 19:28

DD is playing a star in the school nativity play (reception age) There are two other stars. When the letters were sent home to say who was playing what, DD's note stipulated that all she needed for her costume was yellow clothing and it suggested t-shirt and leggings. After trawling shops for a week for yellow arseing leggings, I finally found some today, along with a yellow top (harder than you might think in winter Angry)

Then at the school gate today, one of the other star mums said that she'd been to Tesco and bought a star costume for her DD. Now, I am annoyed for two reasons; 1. Her DD will look like the main star, the Beyonce of the stars and my my DD and the other girl will look like Kelly Rowland and the other one, and 2. DD is feeling hard done by that she has yellow clothes and a tinsel headband. I can see her point. I feel pressured to buy DD a star outfit now.

AIBU to think that the other mum is a show-off and a bit of a nob? It's a reception nativity play ffs. Just get the cheapo yellow clothes and stick some tinsel on yer kid's head.

Yes, I DO have bigger problems to worry about, yes I AM childish and I probably do need to suck it up. (Am a regular under a nc, by the way)

OP posts:
Hulababy · 05/12/2011 20:48

jamdonut - int he case of our school the teachers would let the child wear the bought costume. TBH we are just pleased that the parents bring in the costumes. We don't really mind whether they are homemade, shop bought or just cobbled together. The notes we send home are just suggestions really.

Original poster
sloppyguiseppe · 05/12/2011 20:48

The teacher says "whatever you want to do is fine" They just state plain clothes to be dressed up with tinsel on the letter so that parents don't feel under pressure to spend fifty millionty quid on a bought costume.

Le sigh.

I'm not drip-feeding but well maybe a bit but I suppose that Mother of Beyonce has got my goat because she is a competitive tit in lots of other ways too. She always has to drop in how many parties her DD has been invited to that week/how many invites for tea she has had/how her DD has such a FULL LIFE, full of parties, jazz dance or somesuchshit, teas at chum's houses, swimming galas, dance routine lessons so that she can do the Single Ladies dance at the school disco...

There I said it. She does my effing swede in.

OP posts:
AnotherMincepie · 05/12/2011 20:48

YABU. She just enjoyed buying a star costume, that's all. You're being judgy to imagine she was trying to show off.

AnotherMincepie · 05/12/2011 20:49

Why shouldn't she chat about what her DD is doing? This really seems to be about you, not this other woman.

"she always has to drop in how many parties her DD has been invited to that week"

MNHQ
OliviaMumsnet · 05/12/2011 20:50

@sloppyguiseppe

Kelly, can you handle this? Beyonce, can you handle this? Mee-chelle, can you handle this? I don't think you can handle this! Whoo!

I have always wondered what that dance move was called...
Grin

whomovedmychocolate · 05/12/2011 20:50

It's a reception class, whoever has the best costume will pee in their pants in the middle of it or instead of reading their lines say 'ah bollocks' and sit down in the middle of the stage.

Do not sweat it. Grin

SuePurblybiltbyElves · 05/12/2011 20:50

Full life = over stimulated princess maybe?

I have decided you're fecked whatever you do. Buy a costume - lazy or flashing cash. Make one - too much free time/trying too hard. Cobble together a shit one - making no effort/mean.

Make like the yeast and Rise Above.

DamnBamboo · 05/12/2011 20:52

Presents nah, dont' buy 'em.
You could but you just need to rinse a jam jar, put some stickers on it and fill it with a couple of sweets or lollies and some plastic party tat that you've got lying around.
It costs almost nothing.

That said, I clearly underachieve in the jolly-jar arena, but if you wanted to, you could spend a lot of money.

I won one at a Christmas fair once and it was shoved full of Fortnum and Masons chocs, came in a beautiful kilner, decorated very elaborately with glass paints and had a fiver in the bottom

Hmm

Grin I was right fucking pleased.

Original poster
sloppyguiseppe · 05/12/2011 20:52

Well now you know Olivia and I hope that you will be doing it at the MN office party this christmas!

The DD of Beyonce Mother is lovely, really sweet little girl. I'm just not very competitive and find it quite alien when others are, especially when they are cometitive through their kids if you see what I mean?

OP posts:
recall · 05/12/2011 20:52

Love it, the Beyonce of the stars Grin

SantasStrapon · 05/12/2011 20:53

Sue I always hand made the angel costumes. The DDs were always angels. Every bloody year.

And every bloody year they would whine that all the other angels were wearing shop bought costumes that were far inferior to my lovingly handsewn angel costumes with individually sewn on sequins and tinsel round the neck sleeves bodice and hem. Ungrateful little gits.

SantasStrapon · 05/12/2011 20:55

Oh crap. I was the ultimate PFB Mummy, wasn't I. Thank fuck I hadn't found Mumsnet then, you would have all hated me. Xmas Blush

SuePurblybiltbyElves · 05/12/2011 20:57

I am very PFB too. Or POB, as I only have the one.

Don't care though

SantasStrapon · 05/12/2011 21:00

I didn't either. I was PFB, PSB and now I just smother the pair of them equally. I can't wait to be all PFB Granny now. Xmas Grin

Do you think I would BU to buy some of those gorgeous wooden toy fruit and vegetables and everything else I like for the future grandchildren?

Original poster
sloppyguiseppe · 05/12/2011 21:04

I am going to keep the yellow top and jazz it up by glueing sequins all over it. That's right littleguiseppe, mama's going to make you look showbiz.

Might get him some star deeley boppers too.

OP posts:
RedHotSanta · 05/12/2011 21:06

My DD wore a supermarket-bought star costume in the school nativity when she was in reception.
She looked like a sparkly golden Ku Klux Klan member Grin

Original poster
sloppyguiseppe · 05/12/2011 21:10

I've seen those, RedHotSanta. i think one was linked to up thread. I KNEW they reminded me of something...

OP posts:
TeWiharaMeriKirihimete · 05/12/2011 21:11

I really enjoyed making my 2yos PFB Angel costume this week. Xmas Blush Slightly depressing moment when I thought she would point blank refuse to wear it - but shop bought purple wings appear to have saved the day. Xmas Hmm

SuePurblybiltbyElves · 05/12/2011 21:12

Stratters, do. That's not at all bonkers.

manicinsomniac · 05/12/2011 21:17

I think YABU to assume she was doing anything other than taking the easy way out but I think she was unreasonable not to do as the school had asked.

I'm a drama and dance teacher and it drives me up the wall when the costumes aren't right - hate carefully choreographing a routine for 12 black lycra clad bats (for eg) all moving at the same time and looking identical only to have one kid show up in black leggings and a tee-shirt because 'we thought it would do' - grrrr!

Wherever possible we bulk order identical costumes on the internet now and ask the parents to pay for it if they can.

My younger daughter (Reception) is a snowflake this year (white tights, teeshirt, head-dress and glitter spray) and older daughter (Y4) was an Arabian narrator (yellow Harem costume purchased by the school with the rest of the narrators' from ebay). Only the snowflake head-dress caused me any grief (I'm not artistic and work very full time) but as I was choreographing the junior show I couldn't very well be 'that' parent for the infant show could I!

GreenIceAndChristmasHam · 05/12/2011 21:23

The note said yellow top and leggings.

Are you telling me that some parents read the note and then ignore the note?

That shouldn't be allowed, I think Beyonce should be disqualified. To the 'choir' for you Beyonce, sorry but the blame lies with your mother. Yeah. Your mother.

Pixel · 05/12/2011 21:23

If it is the Tesco star costume in the link further down (here), then surely it needs some kind of tights or leggings and a shirt under it anyway? It couldn't be worn on its own could it?
Doesn't seem such a 'sensible' option now. Xmas Grin

MabelLucyAttwell · 05/12/2011 21:34

OMG! All this fancified costume business! My DD was an angel in her infant school nativity play 100 years ago and she was dressed in a white pillow slip with slits for arms and a bit of tinsel around her head. Commercialism raised its head?

Original poster
sloppyguiseppe · 05/12/2011 21:40

Exactly, Mabel. Commercialism.

It's going to look less homemade with love but shit, more like that fuckawful Littlewoods advert.

OP posts:
Haberdashery · 05/12/2011 21:40

We were asked for a plain white top and leggings/trousers (not tights) for the angel costume for our school nativity (Reception kids). I did have a slight daydream about producing a fuck off great big angel dress with FEATHERS (was wardrobe mistress in former life) before deciding that I'd just do what I'd been told. But it's cream because it is hard buying white things in the middle of winter. I wish they'd told us at the beginning of term, really. I could have got something in the end of summer sales.