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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what you think about young Christian marriages?

305 replies

Ihavewelliesbutitssunny · 28/11/2011 18:25

So over the last few years I've known a lot of young Christian couples who've got married at about 21-23 years old. The classic situation is Christian boy and girl meet at the CU at uni and then get married when they graduate. Obviously part of this is the belief that couples shouldn't have sex before they are married but I think another factor is that they have prayed through and considered their decision to get married and trust that if it is the right decision they should just go ahead and get married. There seems often to be a critical and confused response to this idea of getting married from non-Christians so I was interested to see the mumsnet response. I suspose the idea of waiting for sex and getting married young is something that a lot of couples did in the past and many of us have grandparents or perhaps parents who married young and have had very long (and in most cases) marriages.

OP posts:
CheerfulYank · 30/11/2011 22:14

He might have done, Gins :)

Rational I understand why it might be seen as indoctrination, but (and again, you were talking to someone else...I am quite the butt-iner :o) I can't tell my son anything other than what I believe about Christ. It would be a lie otherwise, because I do believe it.

Rational · 30/11/2011 22:19

Aw, you know how I feel about this cheerful Wink

CheerfulYank · 30/11/2011 22:33

Of course I do. :)

But I wouldn't expect you to lie to your child, and I won't lie to mine. That's all I meant.

SolidGoldVampireBat · 01/12/2011 14:05

Well I have had over 100 sexual partners and never married (and never will). I would much rather have my life than to have been married off to some superstitious buckethead in order to service him domestically until I died of repression. I don't think there is necessarily anything wrong with 'starter' marriages, if people desperately want to engage in them, but they are a rather complicated and expensive way of learning from mistakes. Still, ditching Christianity (or any other superstition for that matter) along with a sexist husband is always a good thing for a woman to do, but it's better done sooner rather than later.

MrGingleBells · 01/12/2011 14:09

Glad to see we're still good for at least one thing SGV

CheerfulYank · 01/12/2011 15:31

And that's cool, SGB, it's your own damn business and no one should slag you off for it.

But conversely, my DH's staying a virgin for "superstitious" reasons until he met me, well...that's his own damn business too.

cantspel · 01/12/2011 15:43

SolidGoldVampireBat If out of your 100 plus sexual partners you have not found one man who is not a superstitious buckethead who only wants you to service him domestically then you are clearly mixing with the wrong sort of man.

rycooler · 01/12/2011 15:47

100 sexual partners? - crikey, you ain't fussy are you. I'm 42 and I've only met about 6 people in my life I'd happily have sex with, but it's your life and good luck to you. I just wonder why, when you're having such an active sex life you're so insulting of marriage and religion? - I wouldn't have thought you'd have the time..

Hullygully · 01/12/2011 15:58

100 out of approx 7 billion is hardly not fussy.

LittleDonkeyhadaMadHairDay · 01/12/2011 16:00
Grin

OH SGB, you do have a skewed idea of what (some) Christians are like. I'll leave you to your 100+ partners as your choice, can you happily leave me to my choice of one committed relationship where we are equal, have fun, and share a deep faith which draws us even closer together? Why does this have to come under your usual misnomers of misogyny and repression?

rycooler · 01/12/2011 16:11

True hully, it's still odd though isn't it, that if someone is having such fun and living life exactly how they want it, that they'd be so insulting about other people's choices? - it doesn't make sense to me. I've known people who have had countless sexually partners, and they're always laid back ( literally most of the time ) type of people - they don't care what other people are doing.

Hullygully · 01/12/2011 16:13

but you care, don't you?

tis the same thing I guess

CheerfulYank · 01/12/2011 16:39

I don't. I don't care who anyone's shagging, as long as it's not my DH. :)

Hullygully · 01/12/2011 16:47

I care enormously. I've got like a giant book of the whole world with all cross referencing and everything.

CheerfulYank · 01/12/2011 16:51

:o

How much would I have to pay you to, erm, rip my page out?

I suppose I am occasionally interested in who other people are shagging... :)

Hullygully · 01/12/2011 16:52

No way Jose, your page has got venn diagrams

CheerfulYank · 01/12/2011 16:53

Could you ink out a few names, mayhaps?

I was drunk I'll have you know. Hmmph.

rycooler · 01/12/2011 16:54

Why would I care?
I'm just interested in why someone who is clearly living the fast life cares about Christian marriages? I can only assume she was turned down by someone from the Salvation Army and has never got over it.

Hullygully · 01/12/2011 16:56

that'll be it ry.

deffo.

CheerfulYank · 01/12/2011 19:15
Hullygully · 01/12/2011 19:44

Haven't got time, darling. Too busy with the revolution..

CheerfulYank · 01/12/2011 21:22
redexpat · 01/12/2011 21:23

I am sceptical because both of the 'young christian marriages' I knew of ended because the man was gay. Total total heartbreak for the women involved.

mumeeee · 01/12/2011 22:31

Rational my children did not suffer indoctrination. Yes we bought them up in the Christian faith. Bur they mixed with children of other faiths and in fact one of DD1s best friends was a Muslim. We didn't force them to become Christians it was their choice.

Angelswings · 01/12/2011 22:59

CY, hugs and baton waving, I'm just waving mine for Jesus. Love sparkles

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