...to expect other mums to consult me before they organise parties!

[Alice38]

Alpha mums at my ds primary have organised a MEGA christmas party (outside of the little class plarty) 3 hours long on the Saturday a week before Xmas! They just went ahead and booked it and now are busily forcing other mums in the class to cough up money for cost and help out! I have politely declined but I am FURIOUS! Who do they think they are?

Room for a little one, it's bloody crowded on here.

?

Very true Abby - I have said no - prob won't tell them to fuck off as that would seal the fate ds - He'd never be invited to another party!! lol

Feel less angry but I have clearly not explained situation very well for such outrage from some posts - never mind ... I tried.

Pinkyp I have no need to get a grip! Thanks for support !!!

McPhee thanks - you alone seem to understand

If you don't WANT to go, or can't go, there is no issue surely? One off dd's friends has a birthday that falls in the holidays. We are always away. We miss it. No-one dies. They still speak to each other.....

Are you actually free? Could you go? I am not clear on this....

And in response to the 'Am I being unreasonable?' I guess the answer is 'yes' ...so budge up on the baffled bench I'm about to join you (as long as I don't have to pay for the priviledge or thank you for it )

Well... it would be rude not to say thank you when we budge up...

But could you just go?

And have a good time or something - whatever that feeling is when you do stuff with your children......

Would you have to get your cozzie on and get in the pool?

May have sussed hidden agenda.

There are lots of Mums like this - they usually volunteer to be the Class Rep so they can feel important and superior - they like to organise things and Be In Charge. They generally also like to have their little possie. I've found, a shrug and an eye roll is all you need Let them get on with organising whatever floats their boat, go if you want, don't if you don't. It is so not worth getting all wound up about.

Endolphins Porto.

You know, what GB gives you and me?

You know - it's not QUITE enjoyment, yet it is also not QUITE a sacrifice. It's kind of "what parent's do" and it needs a proper word....

They can't please all of the people all of the time........

Endolphins!!! That is not something I would think of in GB terms.....

still at what is wrong with orgaising an event that people can choose whether they attend or not.

If you were after 'support' why post in aibu? You asked and I said yes and I think you needed to get a grip that what my opinion. From what you posted you seemed to be making a big deal out of something which you have already said "no" too.. Ok then.

Whass GB?

Gerard Butler.

Alice - I have a plan! Get Gerard and his endolphins to go to the party. Wr'll all come, bring wine and it will be excellent!

The only bit where I think the OP may have a point is that she seems to be saying that the party organisers 'cancelled' someone else's event. What's the detail on that, Alice? Did they actually go as far as to phone up the other mum's venue and cancel the booking she had made? Or did they just say 'Other mum, we are having a party on the same day, can you reschedule?' Which might still be a bit arrogant but it not that bad.

I personally cannot see the problem. I agree with Maryz, they have asked the whole class, rather nice in my book.
Some people are life's organisers and others prefer to let others organise and some just don't want to join in. Fair enough.

The thing is even if they had organised a party through the PTA or the school then they still wouldn't consult every parent to see if the date they picked suited them.

The women probably picked a date which suited them which I suppose is fair enough if they are the ones organising the party. I certainly wouldn't go round asking every parent from the class if the date was suitable otherwise it would turn into a nightmare and the party would never happen.

I would let my child go despite how inconvenient I find it, after all it's Christmas and it's all about the children having fun and being happy. They will play with their friends for a few hours and come home happy.

Forget about how these women make you feel, maybe get to know them and you'll find they aren't 'Alpha Mums' at all but ordinary women who may be quite nice.

I think you're getting a bit of a hard time, OP.

I suspect there are maybe some nuances to their behaviour which you can't really get across in your post? You probably have to be there to understand, kind of thing.

Or, alternatively, you're just paranoid. I don't know.

I think if you'd changed 2 tiny little letters in your thread title (i.e. instead of writing 'me', you'd written 'us') you may, may have gotten a slightly different response.

God, I have all this ahead of me, supposedly.