To have reported this mum to the head teacher this morning?

[shagmundfreud]

I was dropping ds and friend's dd to infants this morning and as I walked through the gate to the playground realised that the loud and hectoring voice I could hear was coming from a parent walking about 10 feet behind me having conversation on her mobile. Between coming through the gate and reaching the classroom she swore five times at least ('he's fucking useless', 'I'm not fucking having him break his promises to her! Etc) in such a loud voice that both the children with me turned and looked at me in alarm and asked why she was swearing. Was I unreasonable to phone the head when I got home and ask her to say something to this mum? Or should I have quietly said something myself (and risk getting slapped - she's much younger and tougher than me .

On a slightly separate note - feel sad for her kids that their mum is having angry public conversations about their dad (several other things she said point to this being what she was probably talking about).

Why is it the headteacher's responsibility to stop a parent from swearing? If it annoyed you - and it would annoy me also - why didn't you say something? Anything - like "Oi, little ears in the vicinity" or something like that?

I think it's a bit unreasonable to be 'running to teacher' when you're an adult. Sorry OP.

Much as its unpleasant - I know I have heard parents do it myself, its not actually anything to do with the school is it?

I can't believe you rang the head. Yes the language is not ideal but she may have been incredibly stressed.

I don't like swearing round children either - but not sure exactly what the head can do about it.

Even if they could stop parents swearing in the school playground, they can't be responsible for anyone's behaviour just outside school - the area in front of DC's school is usually thick with cigarette smoke and a good smattering of "choice" language - if it really bothered me I would say something, but I just try to keep away.

Your children are going to be exposed to bad language in plenty of other places - better that you make them aware of it.

I agree with Lyingwitch - you should have said something to her. I'd have made a joke about the swear box.

YABU. If it was a child swearing then fair enough but headteachers have enough to do without sorting out he said/she said quarrels between adults.

YABU, you should have said something yourself. What's the HT going to do, give her detention?

I agree with Lyin I would've had a word myself.

She was swearing loudly on the school premises.

In the playground.

I wouldn't have reported it if she had been outside the school at the time.

I would have phoned Scotland Yard.

DISGUSTING AND ABHORRENT HANGING'S TOO GOOD

Agree - really unpleasant but nothing to do with the school.

100 lines for you OP... "I must deal with things now that I've left school"...

and another 50:

"I must not make excuses; there is never a right way to do the wrong thing".

YABU for ringing the headteacher!

If it offends you (and it would me) then behave like a grown adult and deal with it yourself when it's happening.

Blimey - there's enough threads on here where parents aren't happy with their dc's schools for whatever reason, yet others are expecting the staff to undertake duties which are way beyond their remit.

A similar thing happened outside DS's school last year, one of the mums chatting to a small group of others about effin' this and effin that, - I didn't say anything to her because she looked like she would lamp me one but someone obviously told the school as in the next newsletter was a reminder to curb behaviour and language in and around the school grounds.

They even went on to say that they welcomed any reports of inappropriate behaviour and would deal with it themselves.

YANBU for not wanting to listen to f'ing and jeff'ing constantly.

But YABVVU for phoning the head. What's he going to do? I mean - come on!

It really makes me PMSL when people talk about 'reporting' something to someone. What are you, 15?

I think reporting her to the Head is bottling it, personally. You should have said something to her.

Perhaps the Head will stand her at the wall?.

As for saying something - she was so angry and absorbed in this conversation I think I would have got a weird and maybe aggressive reaction out of her. Wasn't going to risk that in front of my child.
As far as I'm concerned loud swearing by a parent in the playground is as socially unacceptable as someone emptying all the dirty tissues and sweet wrappers from their pockets onto the ground. It's highly disrespectful to the children and staff and other parents at the school.

And yes - I bottled it because she's young and rough and angry.

Oh btw - the behaviour of parents while on school premises absolutely is the concern of the staff, particularly if that parent is behaving in a way which is frightening or upsetting the children. The children I had with me WERE disturbed by what they heard - it was very aggressive.

You rang the Head, thats the funniest thing I have heard in a long time.

Maybe he will give her lines.

The head can issue a letter asking parents not to swear in the playground. And I expect it will do no good at all - especially with someone as cross and clearly self-centered as that particular mother.

I can't believe you rang the head. Yes the language is not ideal but she may have been incredibly stressed.

so what? no excuse whatsoever for obscene language around kids

Er, the head has no control over this woman. She is an adult. You are an idiot for "telling teacher" about this. You are an adult. If it bothered you that much you should have confronted her (if her aggression was bothering you, confront her next time you see her).