communication

[AIBUmememememe]

we live a ten minute walk from school. there are few busy roads on way. also some drug addicts/drinkers hanging on corners etc. do u think a husband and wife should talk about whether or not their young (both under 10) kids should be walked or driven to school? or should one parent make the decision and not offer the other one any consultation reasons and behind it?

Oh FFS.

Logically, the one who is doing the school run makes the decision. As with any task.

OP, we are wondering which parent you are in order to better understand the situation- it seems such a big deal to you.

It wouldn't change my answer in the slightest, though. Logically, the parent doing the school run decides how to do it.

AIBU instructions for italics are below... You use a ^ around the word.

It matters which parent you are as I have not the slightest clue what it is you're trying to say as your pseudo-hypothetical husband & wife dispute is baffling. It would be much easier if you said 'I think x, DH thinks y, AIBU?' Believe me, people will still reply honestly.

Are the children in question yours, OP?

How do you want them to get to school?

Are your environmental concerns being cruelly disregarded? Are the children in danger of joining the ranks of the alcoholic drug-users?

I know people get worked up about the school run, but this is ridiculous.

WhereYouLeftIt

Oh FFS.

why do u feel the need to swear? You must have anger issues. Very emotional it seems

I think you are all GETTING THE WRONG ANSWER here. The Correct answer is what the OP wants.

This has been a public service announcement.

You're doing it, you said. I think that if your dp has concerns, it would be odd of him not to express them. How you resolve it ultimately, I don't know.

TBH I think if I said to DP we need to sit down and discuss how best to get the DC to school he'd think I was absolutly mental! (Not that he does already, honest) Like I said before, he trusts my decisions on what I do with the DC as I trust his (mostly anyway)

Oh, and OP - to italicise, enclose the text in little "pokey hats" - uppercase 6 on most keyboards. If you are posting by phone, enclose in asterisks to bold the text - some people do that instead. Or plain old quotemarks around the quoted text, preceded by the name of who you're quoting, then a new line for your own comment.

But please do not use capitals, this has been the accepted format for online SHOUTING for a very long time, and it automatically grates on most people's nerves.

Logically, it's clearly the parent who is with the child has to make the decision about the best way to get the children to school. And it's possible to be the different on different days. There's no emotion involved, it's a simple activity, and certainly if my DP felt unsafe walking (which is I hope everyones default for such a short journey) then I'd be looking to address that in whatever way I could.

Personally I'd be pretty unhappy if a 10year old couldn't go by themselves they should be able to cross roads and if the drug addicts are that aggressive then the police should be there - but your children may be younger of course. And be very unhappy if the child was driven, but I'd assume my DP had a sound reason for choosing whichever she did.

ObiWan Wed 02-Nov-11 17:06:07

I know people get worked up about the school run, but this is ridiculous.

SORRY OBIWAN YOU HAVE MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO DISCUSS I KNOW.

ObiWan Thu 12-May-11 14:28:16
But... you can't put a hot teabag into the bin. It will heat all the horrible rubbish up and make it smell.
But I only leave them out to cool down at home.
Not in other peoples sinks. Or anywhere else.
Infact, I prefer coffee and hardly drink tea at all. Really.

I think that it cant be compared to the earn/spend argument. Its more comparable with the who cooks the food picks the food argument. The parents can discuss the nutritional value of the meal irt the dc, but ultimatly it is the cook who makes the meal and the decision. If the other parent objects then theyll have to start cooking themselves wont they?

BTW this Seems an odd way to go about an Aibu- unclear and argumentative.

But AIBU that was at 14.28. Obiwan might be very much busier at 17.06.

OP, if the school run should be discussed in so much detail, where would it end? I'm on maternity leave at the moment, so a lot of the childcare falls to me. Should I give my DH a detailed plan of how I plan to spend my day, in case he objects to some part of it? Sometimes I take the DDs swimming, or cross busy roads, or even take them into central London on public transport. Must I consult DH every time, or should wejust sit down and discuss in detail which risks are, or are not, acceptable?

At that age I was walking by myself after crossing two dual carriageways and going past a woods that I was warned against because of 'bad men'. Of course, it was different in those days, I am an old gimmer.

Drug addicts round here don't really hang around the corners at the time of school runs. It's just educating the kids not to touch discarded needles etc.

OP - what answer do you want?

(Also, marking place in the hope that all is revealed.

Drat, forgot to close brackets

Have I done something to inspire your stalkerish behaviour OP?

Quoting my post about tea-bags from May seems a bit... odd.

But AIBU that was at 14.28. Obiwan might be very much busier at 17.06

14.28 on May 12 to be precise.

A good Rule For Domestic Harmony - IMO of course - is that the person Doing The Task gets to decide how best to do it.

Teabags are a serious subject and the matter needs careful thought and discussion.

I have a special receptacle for mine that I almost never remember to use.

THIS IS LIKE PULLING TEETH.

YOU LOT WILL NEVER SEE SENSE OR THINK LOGICALLY. SOME OF YOU SEEM ON RIGHT PAGE BUT OTHERS ARE A WASTE OF TIME.

YOU WIN.

IM OFFSKI

OP - I don't exactly understand why you are upset. What answer do you want and why?