People who spend ages at the checkout because they are so slow rearranging their bags, putting change away, putting their...

[belledechocchipcookie]

purse in their bag, zipping their bag up, faffing around really annoy me. Can't they just move to the side so someone else can get served. AIBU to be pissed off with them? (Yes, I do have PMT)

Oh for gods sake. Is your life so very boring that THIS is the kind of thing that gets you so wound up you have to mumsnet it? Seriously, what is it that you're in such a great terrible hurry for, that waiting a few more seconds for someone to get their purse together is just tooo much for you?

FWIW I don't take my purse out my bag until the last minute of getting served, and I don't mind waiting for others being as I live in a civilised society, although judging by the anti-social, nonsensical threads people start up on here, i'm in a minority.

Learn some patience and tolerance.

I have read the thread.

Not all disability is obvious. Someone with mental health issues might be unreasonably slow in a check out queue in your opinion

IMO YABU

HTH

Mumsnet rule #564: You can only ever be irritated by earth-shattering, life-threatening stuff.

Bupcakes.

Yes, like whether you should sack the nanny for giving your child squash.

I think you mean cordial, dear.

Bupcakes

I think I know what I mean, thank you very much.

Off you fuck then and don't let the door hit you on the way out!

I have to pack my bags very carefully - I do not have a car to 'dump' the bags in the boot - I am carrying what I can on the pram, and having to carry the rest in my hands and need to be properly balanced weight-wise so that I do not tip the pushchair, and still have my fingers free to puah the pram with. I WILL NOT be rushed - in fact, I am so obtuse - that if the person behind me is trying to rush me and climb into my arsehole - I will deliberately GO SLOWER!!

You ARE NOT more important than me, your needs are no more important than mine - and for all you know, the person in front may have very good reasons to be slow.

If it stresses you this much, then maybe you should avoid situations where other people may be doing what is right for them rather than what is right for you. Maybe stay inside a Hermits cave forever? [hgrin]

OP, YABU, not everyone feels the way you do and you can't impose your principles of what is rude and what isn't on other people. I for example, find people rushing me through the checkouts to be rude. If I only have 30 minutes for lunch - I pack a blinking lunch and drink to take with me so I don't have to waste any of it queueing (OFGS I've typed that word 10 times and it still doesn't look right!).

Why can't people just leave their clothes in a neat pile by the shower door, step through and close it quietly behind them without making a fuss?

Worthless, inconsiderate coin-counting, receipt-folding, purse-zipping, oxygen-stealing, slow-coach bastards.

And yes, I did read the thread, but I did it really quickly so I hope that's okay.

Revelation: on reflection, careful consideration and studious reading of your thread OP I have reached the decision that my time is, in fact, considerably more important than yours.

Bless you for helping me reach that conclusion. I trust it brings you comfort too. Especiallly if you ever find yourself behind me in the queue.

I have to add though - if I have just had a complex partial seizure (which DOESN'T look like what you will all instantly think of as an epileptic seizure), and have gone into a shop to finish my shopping - I will LOOK to all intents and purposes like a normal, healthy, 30yo woman. But I will have to count my change at least 10 times for it to register that it is the right amount to hand over, I will have to check the items as I pack them to try to make sure I have all that I need etc etc - as my thoughts are 'chaotic' while I am post-ictal - but being an LP to 4 dc doesn't leave much recovery time...

Or it could be my DD, who LOOKS to all intents and purposes like your average 13yo girl. But she takes 40 times as long to count out the money she passes over and gets as change as she has learning difficulties that are especially bad when it comes to maths, she panics when rushed by people behind her in the queue as she has autism, and often leaves shops in tears leaving her paid for goods (and even her purse) at the counter because of people behind her have been tutting and telling her to get a move on.

You don't have to LOOK disabled to BE disabled, and a little bit of compassion and understanding that people may need or want that extra time to do what they are doing (and may have had to change their OWN whole lifestyle and outlook on life to do so for medical reasons) doesn't HURT you to give it. Just remember that next time you are in a shop, eh.

And in the meantime - I'm going to continue to piss off the rushers, because if they are in a queue behind my DD one day when I'm not there and they act like that, they could really upset her - so I'm going to go extra slow while grinning at them in order to point out that their rushing can impact negatively on lots of other people - but I will also explain this to them, I'm not just PA without an explanation - but I'm sure those on MN that read my posts will probably be aware of that...

Squash is a racquet game isn't it?

In my supermarket in Paris it says on the till: 'PLEASE HAVE YOUR CASH/CARD READY'

I can't stand people faffing at the check out. And, yes, you can tell when someone just doesn't give a shit about 10 persons behind them, who have to get back to work/home/pee/change their tampon/pick their kids up from school etc etc.

I always have my purse ready before I get to the till, pack the bags, when the cashier asks for money I put my card in, pack a couple more things while the machine is figuring the card out, put my PIN in, pack something else, get my card and receipt and then if I still have things left to pack, I move to the side so the next person can be served. Simple. Consideration should go both ways (so if I see someone genuinely struggling I'll always ask them if I can help).

Some of you are assuming that this woman had s/n or was disabled. Have you not thought that she was just doing this to be awkward? I am disabled myself, I have also worked with disabled and s/n people. I'm not ignorant as to their needs. Do you recognise how fustrating it is to be held up by someone faffing around (I'll cut and paste the post in a minute) when you need to take a leak? I couldn't put the drink back, surely it's far worse to do this and walk out?

This is MN.

You could be mugged at knifepoint and there would still be someone popping up to suggest that the assailant might have had a rare exotic disease that will render him covered in painful, pus-filled hives unless he helps himself to your handbag.

We all come on here for a moan about trivial stuff. It's cathartic. I think that there are people on here who smile serenely throughout lifes little trials without so much as a frown furrowing their brow ever. It must be nice to never be irritated by anything. Not all of us are so saintly. Most of us aren't, actually.

I've been on here for a few years Bupcakes, it rarely changes.

Erm - go for a wee FIRST and then go and queue for your drink? And no I'm not assuming she DEFINATELY has some sort of SN - just that she MAY have done. And that a little bit of patience goes a long way. Just in case she has a hidden disability.

I also have joint problems due to EDS and can't physically manage to hold my purse AND pack my bags at the same time or my thumb joint will sublux, and I'm NOT going to get it out of my handbag and lay it unattended at the checkout while I pack my bags. Would anyone behind me be able to know that that is WHY I don't get my purse out until I have finished packing? Nope, the only way they would know that is if they saw me TRY to fumble with the packing and holding my purse at the same time and they SAW my thimb dislocate. Which I'm not going to do - why would I put myself through pain to 'prove' to rushers in the queue behind me that I ave a 'good' reason for being slow.

Nope, I don't have any idea how 'frustrating' it is to get held up by someone faffing around - because I don't get het up by the person in front of me in the queue taking as long as THEY feel is necessary. I would feel myself to be incredibly rude to expect THEM to hurry themselves for ME. And I dislike being harried and hurried by someone behind me. I had this with someone at the self service last week in Tescos. Actually turned round to him and asked him to back off and give me some space as I was not finished with my transaction yet.

Everybody has a different idea of what is rude, and not everyone WILL get frustrated by people not working to the same speed as they do - because they understand that everyone is different.

BTW - If I am in a queue and the person behind has 1/2 things and I have lots - I ALWAYS ask if they want to go ahead of me. I have even had one person turn me down when I offered (though I only had 3 items), and then they STILL had the utter CHEEK to tut me because I wasn't going as fast as they had thought I would. I mean, WTF?!

I have MS Hunty, the old pelvic floor isn't how it used to be (sobs). I've cut and pasted scaredycat3000 post as this explains it perfectly.

Honestly, same old, same old, if you are going to post an answer read the thread. The problem was not that the customer took ages to sort her purse out, or put the shopping she had just bought in a bag, she re-sorted all her shopping that she was carrying, from different shops, she stood at the till, blocking it whist she found a tissue in her pocket for later, not because she needed it at that moment! This has nothing to do with age or mobility, she was doing totally unneeded things, it is selfishness, pure and simple.

I'm NOT trying to turn this into an SN ranty thread though - I just feel that patience is important in life, and it takes nothng really to be patient when queueing, but can mean a lot to the person in front of you (for whatever reason).

I look at it that every person who is buying something in the shop can take as much time as THEY need to complete their transaction in their own time, they are just as important as I am, or the person behind me.

And the lack of time to pack my bags and check everything and pay is EXACTLY why I have only EVER shopped in Aldi once, and never will again. I cannot physically cope with it - I was 'too slow' according to the cashier, and she started throwing my shopping into my trolley, until all my bread etc was squashed, pies and biscuits were broken, and I refused to pay and walked out without my shopping and went to somewhere slightly more civilised like Tescos.

Transaction is completed when you have paid and packed. That means you shift your arse from the till and sort your shit elsewhere. If part of the "transaction" includes customers faffing with bags/pockets etc, would you start getting annoyed if they decided that they would like to 'phone their partner to ask what they'd like for dinner? You wouldn't want them to hurry up a bit so that you could get on? No, course you wouldn't.

There's a difference between needing time and taking the piss Hunty. The cashier in Aldi sounds like a nightmare, it must have been horrible for you. Some people go at a slow pace because that's the speed that their body can cope with. I understand that. It's really not the same as someone who's holding people up because they are faffing around. She could have very easily have moved up the counter to free the till up. It was a long counter, it wouldn't have been difficult to move so that I could have been served quicker, and so could the guy in the wheelchair behind me.

HuntyCat - I think I love you a little bit, even though we've never met IRL :o

I have in the past told someone rushing me from behind that they're perfectly welcome to pay for my shopping as well as theirs [hgrin]

It may be selfish to HER though to be rushed from doing what she is doing. I see your actions as selfish, not hers - everybody has different definitions of what selfish is.

How is it selfish to check that you have your receipt carefully in your purse? If you are like me, you keep your receipts so you can budget effectively. How is it selfish (in Boots, no less) to check that you have a clean tissue and don't need to buy a new pack? How is it selfish to ensure that you are warm (rearranging your scarf) before you leave the shop? How is it selfish to rearrange your shopping so that your bags are evenly weight-distributed so you are less likely to injure your back? These are all perfectly normal, non-selfish, everyday things that people do.

Surely, the problem was really that you had made the wrong decision in deciding to queue for a drink BEFORE going to the toilet, and you expected the person in front of you to gain that knowledge by thought transfer and GET OUT OF YOUR WAY because the fact that you had undertaken your tasks in the wrong order meant that (to you) your need for the loo was greater than her need to rearrange her shopping and 'faff' as you put it?

Or the problem was that your Boots store only had one checkout open? Not that this woman was finishing everything SHE felt needed to be finished before she left the store?

She wasn't rushed. I stood there and waited in silence. I'm venting on here! FWIW, there were no toilets on the way. It's common curtosy to buy your items and move so that the cashier can serve someone else. It's not my fault she had problems doing this and it certainly doesn't make me selfish