To consider giving our DC absolutely nothing for Christmas

[dramatrauma]

So this week DH asks, what do you think we should get the DC - ages 5 & 8 -for Christmas. (He likes to budget and plan ahead, the sensible man.) He says this just after I have had a good clean-out of the kids' toys, books and games. And you know what? I cannot think of one single thing they need. Or would really play with more than what they already own.

We are not wealthy, and I don't think the kids have overmuch stuff compared to their friends. But birthdays and Christmases and aunties and uncles and grandparents all pile it up. There's enough Lego in this house to build a small city, and furnish it. There are Barbies, Polly Pockets, card games, board games, art supplies, and enough books and DVDs to start a library. They have bicycles and scooters and footballs and dress-up clothes.

I am sick of having all this STUFF. And you know what it's like, there's always little bits of toys/games piling up somewhere, on a bedside table, on a desk, under the bed. I'm forever picking up something and thinking, now what did that belong with originally?

I really don't want to buy them any more stuff. And I don't want other people to give it to them either. AIBU? Or miserable?

After all your kids are still young not teens or adults.

Totally with you on this one OP - it's not that you don't want to get them anything for Xmas just that nagging sense it's all a bit superfluous and you don't want them to be spoilt. Plus the STUFF, all over the house, little bits of knex and mecano everywhere! Drives me nuts!

Don't buy much in between birthday and christmas. Kids do t get adult concepts or ways of thinking , I wouldn't at that age. It is a bit unfair on them, I always used to look forward to my presents from mum and dad. Your kids are only little don't be such a meany

How about an annual membership to a local attraction? They are old enough to understand that it means you can go there anytime you want for 'free'. Or say you'll take them to the cinema every month for the year..it doesn't have to be 'stuff'. Or a magazine subscription each?

They don't know the proper value of money at that age, so don't feel you have to spend a certain amount. You could get a lovely wooden advent calendar or nativity scene with some of the money you saved by buying them something cheaper.

Get rid of a lot of stuff to charity, tell them the money will go to dcs who have very liitle, and that other children will play with their old toys. Show the the Oxfam or save the children website so that they can understand where the money goes.

You know, I can only remember a few of the things I got as Xmas presents as a child, one of my favourites was Snakes and Ladders, my parents didn't usually buy me huge piles of presents or spend a fortune, but I remember being so excited about opening my presents, wondering what I would get and waking up in the morning and looking in my stocking. I'd have beengutted if my parents hadn't got me a present and tbh I think I'd have wondered why my aunties and uncles had got me presents and my mum and dad hadn't got me anything. I can understand wanting to scale back a bit, children get so much these days, but why would you even consider choosing to get them absolutely nothing?

My philosophy is that there they can never have enough books and DVDs, so I just go a bit mental on Amazon and job done. Plus of course a stocking which I fill for under £20 with nicknacks they need anyway - bubble bath, socks, gloves, pencils and notebooks etc.

I totally hear what you're saying, OP - NO MORE CRAP! - but don't be a meanie

notjustclassic Last year both their main presents were second-hand from eBay. And I did feel better about that (kinda like recycling!). But the point is that wherever the stuff comes from - however cheap or ecologically sound - they don't need it.

And piglet I won't be a meanie! I accept that we have gone down the path of Xmas presents in the past, and I can't do a total 180 on Christmas morning.

This is not about the money. We've never spent more than we could truly afford to, and we've never spent much. It's about pointless accumulation of stuff that needs care, attention and tidying.

Agree, halcyon.

"I'd have beengutted if my parents hadn't got me a present and tbh I think I'd have wondered why my aunties and uncles had got me presents and my mum and dad hadn't got me anything."

I'm with you op, there is so much stuff which is never/hardly played with, they always prefer computer or TV if they get the chance. DD will read or occasionally draw/doodle, ds will play with figures, Lego etc only if absolutely banned from 'screen' entertainments!
I too have bought clothes, shoes for presents, (and secondhand toys especially when they were younger). DS has just started playing hockey in a club, so he will be getting a hockey stick and tracksuit. I expect a lot of other parents would just buy those as required and then buy more stuff for Christmas.

On another note, both of mine have birthdays quite near Christmas, so it can be a long time to wait if they 'need' something at another time of the year! When that happens, I usually make them earn it through a star chart and/or pay something towards it from their savings account.

My dc would LOVE a Merlin Pass and would forego a dozen presents to get that!

why don't you sod the whole thing and go to disneyland paris over xmas instead

dont forget if you're having a clear out to donate any good stuff to mumsnet xmas appeal

DH and I always tryto get a 'family' present from sant and a few small gifts for under the tree. Our DC's are 9, 7 and >1,

Last year we got a new wii and a few games. This year we have got a family pass for the zoo we plan to wrap up and take them on boxing day.

My parents used to get me presents 'on loan' from about August onwards. They were duly rounded up in December and wrapped under the tree . It was obviously a swizz, but I had something to say when people asked me what I'd got.

I was slightly less understanding when my Dad bought me a new rucksack. he asked to borrow it on Christmas day, and proceeded to adopt it as his own from then on.

Thank you OhdearNigel - I was fully expecting to be flamed. :)