To wish there was somewhere that boys could just be boys.

[Teapotqueen]

My DS is just starting Beavers (a younger version of cubs) and it has dawned on me that today there is nowhere where a boy can just be a boy without having girls around to think about. Rainbows, Brownies and Guides are girls only. Everything else is mixed sexes, football, scouts, all school clubs. Why is it wrong in the modern world for boys to be with just boys. Just a thought.

Boys can't join Girl guides. A girl can join the scouts.

If you want to argue that 'well, that's okay, cos a boy wouldn't want to join the Guides anyway' - you're pretty much pissing on every feminist argument about the accessibility of all male organisations to female membership. You can point to a number of areas and clubs where women have struggled to gain the right to be admitted, and say 'well, why bother? they don't really want to join a stuffy old man's club, do they...?'

But that's not the point. It's simply unfair to tell them they aren't allowed to join.

And for girls only organisations to be kept that way because culturally, some groups wouldn't allow their girls to go if boys were going to be present - well, that's making some awful assumptions about the attitudes and behaviour of boys.

I expect I am just being crabby! It gives girls a much wider choice whereas boys seem restricted and excluded from a lot.

Lap dancing club?

Girl time isn't necessary. Many children and adults choose to spend time in single sex groups and that's fine. No one is stopping them from doing that.

Aren't Boys Brigade Christian?
DS has always loved his scout groups, and after 10 years, he still goes every week. I agree that the Brownies and Guides seem to struggle with providing exciting and adventurous activities, the girls in scouts seem to want more action and less dancing around the toadstool.

DBTR, I enjoy hanging out with the Mums from playgroup. I think I'd feel about as comfortable chatting about cervixes etc. with a child-free woman there as a man actually. It's a friendly environment because of similar/shared experiences.

My dd is more boyish than my boys (whatever that means) ....they couldnt care less they love everything its us who impart our gender issues IMO

So much silliness here.

Comparing a children's activity to an all male golf club - really? What do you think boys do when they spend time together? Business deals that exclude women? Network over G and Ts?

I can see plenty of merit in girls (CHILDREN) having activities or groups that are exclusively female. But I can also see that boys might want the same, and might well benefit from it. This doesn't mean that those little boys are woman hating patriarchal chauvinists in waiting.

Riverside, yes they are - that would be an issue if your son was another faith. If he has no faith, then it makes no difference as the Scouts is faith based as well - it just doesn't specify which faith.

I can see what the benefit to the girls is fruity, they get to escape male privilege for the duration, but what is the benefit to the boys?

Fruitybread, but who is arguing that boys can't have single sex activities, if a group wants to offer that? Lots of groups do offer just that and it is hardly seen as a scandal.

'This doesn't mean that those little boys are woman hating patriarchal chauvinists in waiting.'

DS hasn't turned out like that, but DD hasn't become a stereotype either.

YANBU. Ignore all the crap above.

If enought people want to start up a boys' club, then they should start one up.

The vast majority of the football clubs round me are boys-only. I'm sure the same is true in other areas.

Boys only because they ban girls, or just because girls don't join?
DS hates team sports, but likes woodcraft and getting lost on walks and such.

Boys' activities within a 5 minute walk from here:

• Football
• Rugby
• Hockey
• Boys Brigade

Girls' activities within a 5 minute walk from here:

• Dance (de facto girls only though boys are not excluded)
• Hockey
• Brownies

Seems pretty balanced to me tbh - certainly no shortage of places for boys to go and 'be boys' (=shout, run around a lot and occasionally be physically violent...)

What a very odd thread. Where we are there are NO girls in the beavers and I never see any down the local Goals either or at the rugby club - where are all these places where girls and boys are doing sport and social things together - tell me so that I can move there and avoid dd thinking she can only do ballet and pretty things for the rest of her life.

Does it matter if girls are banned or if it's self-selecting?

There are various boy only groups where I live as well, and boy only groups at DS's school. They don't admit girls.

I do think most sixth formers should be able to organise camping, hiking etc with friends.

Two DDs and have no desire for them to engage in single sex activities. Don't care if it's ten boys and one DD, will be good practice for when she's running that boardroom... fact the brownies is single sex is something I find offputting.

Timewasting, you don't seem to be making any distinction between children and adults.

Boys can be dominated by girls in mixed situations (one reason why girls are outperforming boys at exams - not much male privilege there, is there?). Girls can be more articulate, more socially skilled than boys, for example, and boys can be less assertive and excluded if they are in a situation where verbal skills and communication are paramount.

This doesn't mean we don't live in a patriarchal society. We do. And there is MUCH work to be done to make life fairer and more equal for women.

But this is not the fault of little boys. They haven't created the society we live in.

I have 3DSs and I wish Beavers/cubs/scouts was for boys only too. I'm also a Brownie Guider. Girlguiding thinks it's important to have a girl-only space and have kept it that way. I think the Scout movement were having problems with dwindling numbers so opened their doors to girls too. We've never had problems recruiting, in fact we're oversubscribed.

I have had a brother of one of my Brownies turn up in uniform, together with a badge sash he made himself. His sister was dying with embarrassment and my boys have sometimes come along to meetings for a bit and loved it. But they're not joining even if they were allowed. I go to get away from them for a couple of hours

YANBU.

I have twin boys and have no idea what you are on about.

It's not so much boys can be dominated by girls as certain individuals tend to dominate other individuals.