to think that falling in your plate is not on at lunch?

[Hullygully]

So, Sunday lunch at a friend's yesterday. A couple that we know slightly are also invited. The woman who is very bright and very pleasant for the first hour, drinks so much that she is literally unable to speak (but doesn't stop trying), and we all carry on with lunch pretending that everything is normal and not laughing where she can see.

Is this normal? In any way?

I was talking about this at the weekend actually Rhubs. I don't think I could actually lick a tuppence.

Yeah, Rhubs ya wally, you might end up with the bit near the balls, the hairy bit. Ewww. You want the business end if you're having just a snifter.

Snorbs - you already did. That's why she's your ex, no?
I hate drunken aggressives. I really do.

Or the middle bit, Pinot. Joined to nothing and just floating. That'd be shit too.
You need more cock than a bit

snorbs I am very sorry that you have posted that in the middle of all the lesbian loving.

I also completely understand your point, and the feeling of impending doom and utter despair that would settle when you knew your partner was going to getting blotto, and there was nothing you could do about it. You can't help people like that anyway, I think you get to the point where you let them carry on and/or walk away. Am sorry that you had to go thoruggh such a cnightmare thouh.

Yup, Sue's right. That veiny middle bit is rubbish, really.

yes but the whole cock is just so damned UGLY!
I mean, why on earth did God make them look like THAT?

No offence snorbs, but cocks aren't the best looking appendages in the world are they?
Having said that, I'd rather it was a cock than a minge.
Cause I've got a minge myself, it holds no mystery to me. Whereas a cock, well I know it's ugly an all but it's a fascinating ugly. A kind of "poke it to see what it does" ugly.

Better the cock you know than the strange minge, in fact?

Oh no, I like cocks. But not the veiny ones, or the purple ones, or the ones ribbed like a hoover pipe. Oh no. Just nice, straight, pointy uppy ones.

Ta.

Poor snorbs

ribbed like a hoover pipe?

@ "A kind of "poke it to see what it does" ugly."

DS2 just said "Mum you're laughing too much, sssshhhhh" :o :o

hoover pipe? :o :o oh dear god stop

I don't like ones that are quite plump at the base then taper to a point at the end. They make me feel sick.

Oh fuck is that not a regualr occurence, ribbed cocks?

I thought iut was odd at the time, but thought was perhaps rather common, like third nippleage.

Perhaps I have slept with freak o' natures.

Is that ribbed lengthways, like a slug's back? Or kind of concertiner-y?

Concertineray

GetOrf, this is the problem with posting to MN when I should be working - by the time I've pieced together a post in between answering the phone and doing actual proper work, the thread's moved way on

Rhubarb, cocks may not be the most attractive of organs but they are at least fairly simple and straightforward like a lot of their owners. Fanjos, on the other hand, are unnecessarily complicated like a lot of their owners. Do you really need so many flaps and crevices?

I cannot stand long thin ones, like calippos.

Much prefer squat and fat.

Stop typing getorf, go to bed.

The long thin ones like a Bender in a Bun.

I don;t understand my own flaps and crevices tbh. It is like having a car with too many buttons and a trip computer.

Cocks are like a moped - poiont and go.

This thread has got so much more fun. Drunken lunch to a lez fest. Had no idea there was a man amongst us either. Divining rod clearly not working well today.

They remind me of those jellyfish you found on the beach as a kid and you'd poke it and then run back fully expecting it to rear up at you.

Cock holds the same kind of fascination. Although I think dh gets pissed off with me poking it and laughing hysterically every time it moves. They are just ripe for taking the piss out of though, which is why I'm surprised that condoms don't have wiggly eyes or squeakers. I'd love that!

Minges just piss and guff. Boring.

Bender in a bun

Christ.

My DH genuinely has 3 nipples. Each with areola and hair. Tis quite gross.