To not want to see my neighbour's cock every time I look out of my bedroom window?

[BupcakesandCunting]

Because I think I see more of his than I do of my own husband's

My very unattractive and portly over-the-road neighbour seems to enjoy fannying about in his bedroom completely in the buff. His window is right opposite mine and I only need to be doing something like pulling my blinds up and it's like "Woah, and there's your nob AGAIN."

Other people in our terrace have noticed it too. DH and I have speculated that he might be a bit of an exhibitionist as it's not even like he's naked but trying not to be seen. He stands right in the window with his family jewels out on display most days. I had to pull my blind down yesterday and put my make-up on with no natural light just so that I could avoid getting my eyes assaulted by a stranger's cock.

How should I deal with it? I've thought about mentioning it to his wife, as in "I don't know if your husband realises, but we can see a lot more of him than he probably realises. You might want to close the curtains in your bedroom in future!" or I've thought about drawing a very unflattering picture of said neighbour in the buff and anonymously posting it to him. It would be captioned "THIS IS WHAT I SEE EVERY TIME I GLANCE OUT OF MY OWN WINDOW! STOP IT!" Or I could just ring the police and report him for indecent exposure. Last one seems harsh though.

I'm not being U, am I? It's not a one-oof, it's most days. And it's rank. :(

According to Wikipedia, it is indecent exposure to expose your genitals in public or in view of the public.

So I won't be putting window film up (and ruining my lovely windows!) or shutting my blinds, thanks!

Pffft, if I got burgled I suppose it would be my fault for having stuff that people want to rob, eh?

How about you send him some to put over the offending object

Fuck off! When did they appear?

Can't you just go round?

Bloke over the road didn't have blinds on his bathroom window. After a few times of seeing him lower himself in the bath/take a shower/have a piss I called round and told him that me and my daughter didn't like his show (and probably half the people on the field behind my house could see too!!) He was mortified and bought a blind the next day.

I do keep winking at him when I drive past him though - he goes red so easily.

Oooh no. He might put on a spinning bow tie too, a la Frank Butcher.

Eew, ugly neighbour cock, can't think of much worse, yuk.

The kind of people that stand in front of an uncurtained window flapping their bits about usually do it for attention, so if you tell him you have seen him it might make him worse iyswim?

Oooh.

Those are for your Bupcakes.

I agree with those who say call the cops on the cock.

Hahahaha, I love that I'm not the only person who references that Frank Butcher scene.

Are these in response to those people who wanted a star emoticon?

I went for a wee in my friend's en suite bathroom once - she lived in a converted barn so the window was low. I turned and looked out of her window to see her carpenter grinning up at me - he was building a roof to a porch and was stood on it, hence he was about 3 ft from looking at my arse hanging over the seat . I was heavily pregnant too at the time, so not really about to whip my belly huggers up speedily and make a hasty get away.

Sorry - bit of digression there. Seeing your neighbours knob on a daily basis isn't a vista I'd relish. YABU though. You clearly should upsticks and move house.

Ooh Bupcakes! And Stratton! All still present and correct.

Lovely

YANBU

RIZZ0

Present indeedy. Rarely correct though.

Rizzo, where have you been?!

Oi! I bared me soul there
What's with all the hugging?
We're meant to be talking about knobs.

Incognito...

Just a bit MN'd out. But fresh and raring to go again now!
Who's in? Who's out? Who's Mitmoo?

Does Sarah still love a plant?

Soooo much catching up to do....

Yes what is his knob actually like?

Sorry Moth, I did read your post and guffaw heartily and I shook my head in concern for you. You must be scared. Are you still pregnant? If so, fancy a bit of cake? If not, have a to help you forget.

I haven't paid much attention to his knob. The man-gunt is the thing that you see first, then the moobs. At that point, I am reaching to close my blind...

So what are you going to do, OP (aside from the Internet name thing - excellent!)? If I were you I'd simply report it to police as indecent exposure and leave it to them.

I am either going to report to police or talk to his wife. Talking to police is appealing more as I -am a fucking wuss-- hate confrontation...

Ring his wife as he is doing it then enjoy watching the fallout as she goes in to tell him off.

Or, paintball him in the winkie.

It was 9 years ago now but I've never got over it especially since the Carpenter is a bit of a god and I see him all the time on the school run

That aside, thanks for the concern , but let's talk about the errant knob. I think a quick call to the Blue's is a good idea.

www.nytimes.com/2011/09/26/us/san-francisco-nudity-restrictions-provoke-the-nakedly-ambitious.html?emc=eta1

I am liking the paintballing him in the winkie idea.