To wonder why anyone with school-aged children would want to be a SAHM?

[Badtasteflump]

And what they do all day?

I have my flame-proof hard-hat ready

In the spirit of the general shit-stirring on here today I though I would ask this - as I do really wonder. Fair enough when you have pre-school aged children, I can understand wanting to be a SAHM. But once your children are at school full-time, what is there to do all day?

I work PT (school hours, basically). I manage (jointly with DH) to get all the housework, cooking, diy, etc) done in the evenings & weekends, no problem. If I were at home all day I really think I would go a bit mad - either that or I fear I would gradually become relegated to the role of house-slave, doing all the housework and childcare myself because I wouldn't have the excuse of a 'proper' job. . .

Oh, I thought he was a bit hairy.

Er carer = [[eson caring with disabled kids / adults.

So not wuite sure...

forget it, gonna go and heat up some soup.

It's not anti-feminist to be a SAHM.

It's anti-feminist to have the view that women OUGHT to live a certain way because that is the correct way for women to live.

JillySnooper, award accepted.

Oh god, 2 weeks back ft after 15 months maternity leave and this thread is killing me.

I even have a shaggable gardener.

I so want to be Jilly or Pag (no news there...she's been my girl crush for years...ahem)...

At this stage (3 under 6) I get a lot more time on MN done, and time to read the newspaper cover-to-cover, and drink HOT tea, when I go to work. I appreciate this is an almost diametrically opposite position to that of the OP, but the whole WOHM thing has its upsides!

There are undoubtably a huge number of people who do shit, uninteresting soul-destroying jobs, which they desperately need to do for much needed money. These people don't have the opportunity to give up work, but would probably dearly love to.

Is it really surprising therefore that a lot of people perceive not working to be a little bit self-indulgent? Is it surprising they might be a bit green with envy?

i have plenty to do,
school and nursery run
afterschool activities
playdates
gym 3x per week
hair/nail appointments
help with school
lunch once a week with dh
coffee once a week with friends
book/peruse holidays
currently refurnishing whole house,sofas beds etc
household bills etc

See I would worry Gay40
I have been a sahm for ages and have never even overheard anyone discussing laundry.

I would ponder the fact that they had just spotted they were being overheard and changed the subject.
They were probably discussing gardeners, gardening I mean

They like being ponces. Kept women. They couldn't handle a hard days graft.

Simple.

I don't think I'd get on with Gay to be honest (I'm not even a SAHM of school age children) simply because I place value and worth on people regardless of whether they go to work. If someone sat and wittered on about their job all evening I'd be bored witless, unless they were curing cancer or similar which I doubt she is. My mother didn't work (bar bank nursing) till I was mid teens, our school hours and life wasn't compatible with it. I still respect her hugely, have a great work ethic and am under no illusions that my previous career in marketing (well paid and high powered) was anywhere near as important in reality as some people in here seem to think their jobs are.

GAY - oh, I don't find you offensive.

I just think you're a thick twat.

I was SO waiting for the 'I go to work for a rest' line.

oh no cleaning,have a cleaner 3x a week,i just sort shit out

Let's not forget the dogs that can't be left for more than a few hours.

"I like my independence and being able to pay for things myself. I don't want to live with someone else who funds us all. I don't want to give DD the impression that women sit at home farting around with the OU and go to the gym in the faint hope that developing a bit of muscle tone will keep their DHs interested.
I know a fair amount of SAHMs and they have nowt to say of any worth (no offence). I'm not interested in brands of washing up liquid or voluntary work down the unicorn sanctuary.
But each to their own."

You obviously don't understand how a successful partnership works. It isn't all about finance you know. I also don't have a hang up about who contributes what to our partnership financially. OH does contribute more financially, but so what. I contribute more in terms of home making, childcare, gardening, looking after the cars etc.

Also you must have a very limited life outside of work and a complete poverty of imagination if you can't think of anything useful to do if you didn't have a job.

Why does it just have to be about money?

Can I suggest that you read Roalddahl's thread again and perhaps you will realise that your patronising claptrap says more about you than the rest of us.

Oh, BTW we have been happily married for 30 years.

Well, I respect your right to the opinion that I'm a thick twat

Fabby

I like simple but it is rarely anything except simplistic.

Are you just assuming that sahms leave school and then become sahms?
You do get that many have careers before they sahm.? Or before and after?

It is staggering how often women have such poor opinions of women isn't it?

Besides, without volunteers and other unpaid workers (carers etc) this country would be down the swanny. Or do charities etc not matter any more?

Yes Fabby
because of course as soon as that last child goes to school a a woman loses all capability she had before.

*It's not anti-feminist to be a SAHM.

It's anti-feminist to have the view that women OUGHT to live a certain way because that is the correct way for women to live. *

RoaldDahling, you have summed the whole thing up perfectly in those two sentences. Not just an excellent response to the thread, but in helping me clarify/ reconcile my own thoughts on the matter in general. Nothing more to say on the matter. Thank you!

Whips out SAHM Bingo Card and marks off, I go to work for a rest, but what do you do all day, I could never live off anyone else and Id go maaaad stuck at home al day

Any one got a full house, yet?

The phrase "home making" makes me want to vomit chintz.

I don't have a dog but I did notice a sanctuary that refused to allow rehoming to anyone out more than 4 hours a day (and would check with employers)

Thank goodness for gerbils! I am frequently out more than four hours a day.

And yeah I am well tough. I can't wait to go back to work for a rest. DH can share the bloody night shifts then! He'll have one role not two and so will I (don't be fooled anyone to thinking poor Sancti's DH: he bloody loves it! )

i think i have Jilly

has anyone mentioned 1950's yet?