STAND UP AND BE COUNTED AND STOP THE ATTACKS ON SN PARENTS

[4madboys]

ok NOT an aibu, but this is where it will be seen the most and it NEEDS awareness.

quite frankly, i along with others am appalled at the comments that are being made and left to stand, toward the SN community, they are downright offensive and quite simply appalling.

i am sure (or hope) that the majority on here do NOT agree with them but yet the SN community on mn are not being supported, whether this is because people do not know what to say, or they havent seen these posts i do not know?

BUT IT IS ABOUT TIME THAT THINGS CHANGED, so this a thread where you can stand up and be counted and say that you do not agree with the disregard, blatant trolling and offensive behaviour towards our lovely mn who have or are dealing with sn in their family.

they need this place for support, not the vile behaviour that they are getting.

so please post here and show your support and help make a change for the better.

all it takes is a smile next to your name to show you agree :)

Yy Peachy that is how I feel. I think the definition of personal attack has gone too far and hate-speak is being allowed to stay because of it.

I'd like to see less preciousness about personal attacks, some words being automatically deleted and yes a list of words is what I'm suggesting (maybe not published but at MNHQ), proper explanations sent to posters with deleted messages (or nothing will change) and a zero tolerance attitude to posts attacking protected characteristics.

WHY did they delete the whole f'ing thread? See, that's what I have huge issues with.

The message read 'thread deleted by MNHQ because let's face it, it was all a bit of a bun fight' or something like that.

Leave the threads, some of the points made, in fact 99% of the posts on these threads are valid points and make a good debate. There is only a small handful of posters who see fit to cause a 'bun fight'

What is this place turning into?????

Being an aunt of a SN child,and having also been bought up around many SN people (we lived in NHS accomodation at a specialist hospital where my father was administrator, before "care in the community" was the norm) I do tend to comment if I see a threat which is offensive or ignorant. I have never yet reported a comment, so pehaps I should start doing that more!

I think there is only one word I have been a bit about when people have objected to its use - and that is "meltdown" - because, although it is used to describe the serious level of reaction that some children with ASD have, it is a word in its own right with other meanings as well, and because of that I don't feel that it should be appropriated for just one of those meanings.
Other people on this thread may disagree with that - but I think it's outside of the "offensive" list, because if I were to say that I completely lost my temper and had an absolute meltdown I mean that my temper was becoming dangerously explosive - not that I am trying to liken myself in a bad way to a child with ASD.

So I agree with Whatmeworry - it can go a step too far sometimes.

Deleting entire threads but refusing to even countenance hiding posters is illogical at best and down right offensive at worst. We are not children!

i havent seen the comments that were deleted but when they are an explanation from mnhq would be good and yes it would be good if they could post on here what is worthy of deletion, what isnt and what they are going to do about this situation.

and as for worrys comment yes of course all these parents that have had to fight years for a diagnosis are just crap parents who need to get a grip?! really what planet are you living on?

thumb that may have been me, if so I have revised my stance on that

actually i meant what nailitorelse said.

apologies whatmeworry :)

Nailto I missed that.

But you know, unless you post me some research backing up your opinion and training I am far less likely to accept your opinion of what is an incorrect dx than that of a qualified diagnostician.

In my own field I see far more undiagnosed children, some actively denied a dx by SENCOs etc unwilling to refer, than wrongly dx'd children (one, possibly, not within NHS and I wouldn't swear on it)- not that it is even vaguely possible to know if a dx is wrong or not in a single meeting or even run of them; ds1's asd is well documented but it takes 6 weeks or so of contact with someone (eg a new teacher) before he releases himself from the pressure to appear nt.

I woner if people are aware of the process to obtain an NHS diagnosis? Dh has a MH diagnosis and it wa far easier to obtain; ds1's took 2 years, ds3's 3 and that's actually not too bad from what I read.

But yes, evidence please. I've passed my MA Autism diagnosis module (not in any way claiming to be a Paed or similar, just that i've read reams of papers on the subject) and haven't seen that as widely shared idea tbh.

its on p26 peachy, and although it has been asked to be deleted it wont be.

yoru answer is much better than mine

but it is a lovely example of some of the rubbish spouted to sn parents on mn

Ok, had a reply as to why my response to middlesex's use of disabilist language was deleted:

"Hi there,

You post was deleted because you made a direct personal attack. This is against our talk guidelines.

Best wishes

MNHQ"

I'm out. I shall hopefully see most of you on fb, peachy, thank you for that info. I am not a child, there was nothing in that post that was worthy of deletion. I refuse to be treated the same way they treat bigots.

What did you say, Lissie?

Lissie (have also been posting as IrmaMuthafucker on this thead btw but can't be fannying about with namechanges on my phone).

BOF she said nothing worthy of deletion. Absolutely nothing. She said the poster was being a twat. And s/he was!

I said, either you misunderstand what this threadis about, or you are being a twat.

I am fucking fuming.

Xpost, thank you DS. This is exactly what I've been saying on the other thread. Maybe mnhq should clarify what constitutes a personal attack.

Xpost, thank you DS. This is exactly what I've been saying on the other thread. Maybe mnhq should clarify what constitutes a personal attack.

Again, what the actual fuck? Why was that deleted? People say a lot worse to one another on here!

And if a poster is being a twat, then of course it's going to be pointed out.

What is going on!!

Poor Lissie xx

So pointing out that a poster is being a twat is a personal attack, but the stuff directed at me and the other posters that post about SN or disabilities isn't. What the ACTUAL fuckity-fuck??!!

Thanks guys. Am genuinely upset and pretty damn angry. Am I supposed to say "can you not use words like that, thank you" if I wanted heavy moderation I would have joined nm or bounty. If I am being a twat, I rely on mners to call me on it. I don't expect to be deleted for telling someone they are out of order.

jeez, that's shit. I'll be sorry if you go Lissie - really will. :(
Am beginning to think that someone has infiltrated MNHQ or brainwashed them or something - it's fucking ridiculous if a post that gives an either/or option becomes a "direct personal attack".

IF it had said "you are a twat", fair enough, but it didn't, did it - it said you've either misunderstood (one possibility) OR you are being a twat (alternative possibility about the Behaviour, not the person) - that is just barking and actually pretty pathetic.

I don't understand this either Lissie, - I reported middlesex's post on here and another on a completely unrelated thread here . Note my post where I told her/him that I had done so. Doesn't make sense that you should be deleted does it?

If you can't say someone's being a twat on MN where can you say it? Grim.

hopefully middlesex will get done for bunking off school today.