to think crying in work is just a bit weird?

[RedHotPokers]

I don't know what it is with the women people in my office. They just seem to cry an awful lot. I find it bizarre.

Recently my colleagues have cried for reasons including:

1. Someone being a bit 'off' with them on the phone
2. Losing some unsaved work on the PC
3. Feeling unappreciated
4. Being asked to take on an additional piece of work cos someone is off sick
5. Even because they left their purse at home would you believe!

Since when was it the done thing to run off to the toilets sobbing every time something a bit stressful happens.

I can honestly say I have never cried in work. If I have been a bit pissed off or stressed, I take it home with me (rightly or wrongly). I would be mortified at the thought of sitting weeping at my desk!

AIBU to think people should get a grip?

(And btw, my workplace is one of the least stressful I have EVER worked in. Think public sector admin, no threat of job losses currently, and very few people working past 5pm).

Unless you know all their circumstances you are a bit unreasonable. The minor annoyance may have been the straw that broke the camels back.

I have cried at work but generally only after being assaulted or threatened for the second or third time in a shift. When the abuse comes in batches it can be harder to handle.

Ah, MrsDV where I used to work, I would NEVER cry in front of the kids.

I'd wait till the little chuffers and their tales of extreme woe had left my office, shut the door, sob and eat far too much cake.

Seriously, as you'll understand, some people have no idea how hard some of those poor kids have it, and it was my job to not be shocked/upset/devastated at what they told me, just to listen, be there for them and advise, and man, that's hard.

There is a trick to wearing a calm face when internally your brain is saying ohmygodnoyoupoorthingiwanttotakeyouhomeandlookafteryou.

Incidentally, my rep at work was that of hard faced bitch. Someone even wrote it on my desk once..... Aaaaah, the glory days.

i have had a good cry at work for two reasons first i had just had to have an erpc op after i lost my baby and one of the people i support said something in the way i have had nothing major to deal with in my life (prior to this found out my ex husband had been cheating on me with two other women ) and second had to have three quarters of my cervix removed due to the fact that it was on the verge of being cancerous and feeling a little vulnerable cried so sorry if i am being a wimp

However, I forgot to say that when my Dad died unexpectedly, I sat sobbing like a loon at my desk, in a student area refusing to be moved for 3 hours.

They had to fetch someone from HR to send me home!

I have cried at work in front of people once, I started having weird scary stuff going on at the end of my pregnancy at work. I felt like I was pfb so sucked it up and wasn't going to go to hospital so sat there then lost it completly and then went to hospital.

I have cried at work lots of times. Its where I used to spend most of my waking day so it makes sense that it would happen there. But I take myself off and dont make a massive show of it because when you do that you are doing it for attention.

• should say when its not about something important etc, if you lost a family member or somethign you haven't got to hide it- obviously!

Why would anyone think you were a wimp devon?

cause op i have told have said that i should just pull my self together and get on with my life

I agree that this crying thing sounds bizarre Redhotpokers, but I have to take issue with those who react to stress by swearing. One of my colleagues used to swear really aggressively everytime something went wrong for him, and it really put a downer on the whole of our small team. I agree that people need to control their emotions at work, but that goes for aggression too.

(I'm not a prude by the way, another former colleague was amusingly potty-mouthed but it was fine, because there was no venom in it.)

Sorry, what I mean is those on here who say it's better to react to stress by swearing...

Sounds possible you collegue might have other stuff going in her life that she might not want to discuss at work but is obviously affecting her.
I tend to find when something major is going on that would be understandable to cry about, I don't cry about it but carry on normal then something small and stupid happens and then I cry and get stressed about it. But in reality its actually about the major thing. If that makes sense

If you were my colleague I would probably tell you to get a grip! People have all sorts of problems which are not necessarily work related and then it may only take one comment to topple them over the edge. Clearly you are very ignorant and unsupportive . I can only say that your time will come and if it doesn't then I think you are very weird
For the record yes I have cried at work, I would prefer to let steam off that way than exploding at my children at home later. Mine was due to work place covert bullying and the frustration at having to stay there with this person because she was my mentor and there was nobody else to take over (or so I thought until several months later). Luckily my colleagues cared enough to help me face the bully, rather than judge my crying. Oh and I also have high expectations of myself and sometimes cry in frustration when I haven't achieve to my expectations.

I'll probably end up in tears in the office tomorrow, hopefully there won't be any of the nosy judgemental cows around.

Just keep repeating

"I'm not human, I'm a corporate machine" Then swear a lot.

Seems to work for some

No she didnt Devon

She didnt say she hates people crying because horrible things have happened to them.

She said she thought people blubbing over stupid things was annoying.

Well call me a nosy judgmental cow then.

I dont like people crying because they have lost a pen.
Or someone is sitting in their chair
Or their plant has died.

We have enough to deal with at work without that sort of bollocks going on.

But as usual people are determined to ignore the actual op.

Everyone who dislikes frequent crying at work over trivialities really means that they want to slap the recently bereaved, sacked and seriously ill

In my work place if someone cries for whatever reason and it does happen occasionally . We support each other and don't think it's weird.

thefirstmrsdevere it wasnt anyone on here sorry if i gave that impression it was a colleague of mine so sorry for any confusion

She said she thought people blubbing over stupid things was annoying

But lots of people myself included have posted to say that although it may appear to be over something stupid...really there is often something much bigger thats causing the upset and the 'stupid' things is just the last straw.

How do you know if its really over something silly or something bloody awful?

IME you cant know unless you know...so id rather not get too judgy tbh.

...and im not ignoring the OP, im suggesting that it more than likely isnt as trivial as it would appear to her

EverythingnotRosie - someone once said on here if you push your tongue hard against your palate behind your top front teeth, it can stop the tears - I've tried it a few times and it does make a difference! No idea how but it seems to help.

Jareth - you go for it if you need to love. x

I was talking about the actual nosy interfering cows at work who will Jo doubt assume I'm upset about something trivial

Hi Thumb :)

Think ill probably be off tomorrow anyway.. Blrtgh

That might be a very good plan, Jareth. Give yourself more time. Perhaps until next week, if you can get away with it. :)