I don't agree with the MN feminists. AIBU?

[jennyvstheworld]

I consider myself an active proponent of equality of opportunity and a stern critic of discrimination... and yet I find that I can't identify with many of the viewpoints I encounter on the MN feminism page (and often say so). AIBU?

'What do you mean by 'evangelical', though?'

My son has Aspergers. It has taken years for him do develop an understanding of what a discussion entails, as opposed to a monologue of his views and opinions. Where a space in the discussion is an opportunity for him to have reflected on what has been said and respond with that reflection in mind, rather than seeing it as an opportunity to continue down the track. he's got a lot better at it.
To me, evangelical means so convinced of the rightness of your thoughts and words that nothing else is relevant and thus worthy of consideration or discussion.

Thanks goblin. I understand now.

I would say, though, that there are certain issues which crop up regularly on the feminism board, which naturally inspire 'evangelical' responses. I know I'm that way about abortion, for example. So someone pro-life might post X, and I'll post Y. I might say Y in a variety of different ways, but I'm never, ever, going to deviate from a pro-choice position, and no-one posting X is ever going to change my mind. They'll probably think I'm an evanglical arse. But I think it's important to have that argument - far more important than what someone thinks of me.

That is why there are certain topics and certain posters that I wouldn't engage in debate with, it would be pointless. But that holds true for all the different areas of MN, not just the feminist board.
For example, DogsBestFriend and I have had many a civil exchange, but there are some topics we will never come to agreement on. Like dogs for example.

You don't have to agree with the people on the Feminist board. Many of them don't agree with each other. It is really interesting to read some of the discussions and find yourself seeing something from a different angle for the first time.

Why is 'sex' regarded as penetrative sex? Why is virginity measured by that? (And it's not about the hymen as many of us don't have an intact one before our first penetrative sexual experience.) Lots of women enjoy it, but a relatively low percentage achieve orgasm though this alone. The clitoris is on the outside after all. Why is penetrative sex considered 'full sex'? And it can't just be about potential pregnancy as anal sex is included as 'full sex'. Do you remember as a teenager counting other things as a half when totting up numbers of sexual partners?

It doesn't mean you have to go and burn you bra or the nearest man, it just makes you think about how you view the world.

YANBU.

I've found it hard to get into the feminism board, although I'd like to. I'm definitely a feminist but don't have the detailed knowledge about the subject that many of those on the feminism board do. When I've tried to contribute I've felt a bit "lacking" and unwelcome.

They can seem a bit haughty sometimes when they're in full flow, but I think that's actually defensiveness caused by heavy targeted trolling/troublemaking. As someone mentioned earlier, the chicken keepers don't seem to get (as far as I know) people starting threads about them all being welly-wearing, stinky, turkey-hating harridans who are poultryist and trying to convert others to their chicken-only stance.

Are those chicken-types puffin haters?

InstantAtom, I approached Feminism (on MN) as a complete and utter newbie. I only knew the basics. I've seen some people turn against feminism, I've seen some people grsdually turn towards it. If you do worry about posting on Feminism, but want to, feel free to add a note to your message to say you're still new to this. They seem to be gentler then, than if you're just jumping in and telling them your views as if it's gospel. (That's what I found, and it's not meant as inflammatory to any of the feminists on the board) We are subject to quite a bit of trolling, so we do get quite defensive sometimes, I'll be honest

No. One of them said I was nice. However I wouldn't want to mess with her if I was broody.

posieparker[12.47]
i am the poster that you have mentioned in youre post.
youve stated that i am "very very anti-men"!
id like to point out that this is only youre oppinion-in fact-i fight and stand up for some very marginilised men in rl[and at times on here]-men whom i love deeply.and will fight forever for if need be.
you also said that i had nearly been gang raped-i actually said that i had been threatened with it.
i talk mostly about women in the feminist section as i feel women are more marginilised than men.
i was actually talking about some difficult experiances on that thread-with hope that others understand and hear.
for you to pull some of it out and use it to help you in a disagreement/put youre point across is bad taste.
i often talk about difficult experiances as i hope it helps others and i hope more people will have understanding for others.other times i debate.
this does not mean i hate men.
yeah-i dont like men who shout out"wheres ya dick"or men that harm me-
and actually-these are the same kind of men that i stand up against for other men.

over in feminism, ironically, SAF

Easier to just hide the topic then

Anon. I had previously noticed that there was a certain amount of eye-rolling on feminism about the AIBU board. In a light-hearted moment this morning, I wondered what the AIBU view of the feminism threads was and framed a quick question to find out. The results have largely been very entertaining. However, it certainly wasn't the intention of this post to have people report on others' difficult personal experiences. Apologies that this has happened.

J V-W

DCMFD Have PM'd you to put you out of your misery - but guaranteed I will be no one you actually remember!

SAF To be fair to Jenz she might be busy. Am sure she will pop right back on when she can. Am intrigued to know what being an active proponent of equality of opportunity entails? As opposed to my rather arm-chair based "activism". I mean it can't be just abiding by the equality laws already in place can it because that would just be like the rest of us mere citizens and can't really be called activism, just avoiding being unlawful - it must go beyond that?

Oh damn its all been a ploy, Jenny has been playing the am i being unreasonablers vs feminists!

gosh, she really is dastardly clever isn't she ?

You certainly got your point across Jenny :)

BBQ, it can be anything IMO. (sorry, hijacking your question to SAF). A lot of feminists I know take part in marches, I blog (when I have the inspiration) and try to raise awareness of issues. I don't think there's a "if you haven't done this, you're not a feminist" checklist.

If there is such a thing as AIBU vs Feminism, then I reckon it's backfired.

What I have seen is a reasonable discussion, and certainly in my case, a valid reason for wanting to delve into the feminism topic again.

@ results have been largely entertaining

Jester costumes with heels

Who the arse is Nrky?!

Narky, of course. Stupid keyboard