To wonder how I have managed to get to 39 without ever coming across 'fat prejudice'...

[joric]

....until I found Mumsnet???
I have always been fat and can honestly say I had no idea that people thought so badly of people who are overweight.
AIBU to think that not everyone thinks we're disgusting, smelly freaks ( based on my positive experiences with friends and strangers over the years)?

Timewasting... Are they feeling sorry for me?!!! :o

Yes joric and TimeWasting - well, not the smell, never noticed that, but a seriously obese person next to you on a long journey is no joke. S/he is exporting discomfort. On planes I take the first chance I get to push the armrest down and then keep it down.

Andrew!! I hope you don't smell, I'd hate to sit next to you on the plane if you do!

What about very tall people who need to stick their knees out to one side?

Or the ones that don't sop talking to me!!! :o

I would sympathise if I do! But I believe people who smell are mercifully unaware of it - whereas those who are on the large size know it perfectly well and some of them seem to lack any idea that they must squeeze themselves into their fair share of the space and not take some of a neighbour's share.

Opinions on Mumsnet are probaby no different than society in general except some people say things on here that they feel that they wouldn't have the balls to say to people face to face.

I have also found that many people belittle others to make themselves feel better. If they had better self esteem it wouldn't occur to them.

I am not overweight but i did have a bloke call me a prostitute because i had a better car than him. I guess had i have been very overweight he would have just called me fat instead. I guess people say whatever they think will push buttons.

Andrew.
Allow business class to be your friend. More space.

I have only been overweight for a few years after not being able to exercise because of illness, as well as according to my doctors, the medication that i am on.

The attitudes on here have made me feel temporarily depressed at times, the same posters that make comments about fat people wouldn't dream of attacking any other group.

I laugh at the ignorant assumptions, though, because normally sane posters spout the most unbelievable claptrap, well according to my consultants, when i have had a hospital appointment and asked questions.

People read stuff about being morbidly obese and think it applies to someone who is less than 6 stone overweight, but it doesn't.

I have no issue with people that are overweight, I think it's a hard battle and essentially unhealthy. However when parents allow children to be overweight that's another issue.

Eating a poor diet is unhealthy regardless of what a person weighs, not necesserily being overweight.
The point is, most of the posters that will say things about people carring body fat would defend any other group of people or activity, one in particular i have seen defending smoking pot, the arguements put, are not correct.
My hospital is a teaching hospital and i was involved in trials, my score for the possibility of getting heart disease/cancer etc came out really low, which i questioned because of my weight but was told by my doctors that it is a range of factors which decide health.

My cholesterol is better than my doctors because i am vegan and don't drink, my weight means nothing to my health but people on here seem to think that it would be ok for them to see me and make speeping statements or judgements.

I should clarify, Joric, that I'm Catholic too, it wasn't a veiled attack :o

I don't use public transport either. I'm one of the fat arses that drives to work (1.25 hours each way, not down the road).

No Gwendolene :o it wasn't taken as one! I was laughing at the fact that I am 'cursed' by being both!!!! Hence ' bloody hell gwendoline' as in ''s**t, I hadn't thought of that" !!!

Andrew- agree, first class all the way!!

Yep, I have noticed a lot of fattist commentary on here. This is one of the reasons I tend to spend less time on here, TBH. At 18 stone, 5'3", size 24, I am in the red zone. I have low enough self esteem, without paranoia being reinforced by smug perfect skinny people who think that just because they are slim, everyone can be.

According to a lot of people on here, I should be ashamed of myself for taking up too much room, being ugly (actually, I think I have quite a pretty face, but that doesn't seem to count), disgusting blob of fat (should be wearing hessian sack), lazy (despite the full time job, 24/7 single mum, part time hons degree study) a drain on the health system (which doesn't want to help me, just criticise me), and for being weak willed and generally either lacking in character and probably thick.

Oh missymarmite fuck 'em, I bet you've got lovely big boobs. X

Of course fattism exists outside MN. You're very lucky if you haven't encountered it.

Yep, it exists, but it isn't quite so...vocal! Or in your face.

NevermindtheNargles,

I see lots of support for larger women on here. On style and beauty there are lots of encouraging posts and suggestions for clothes for those who are finding the prospect of buying something in a big size for a wedding or other event very daunting. One recent thread was made up of huge numbers of posters saying that you are never too big for a bikini. I'm nt fat now, but I have been, my mother banned me from the county she lives in!

Missymarmite :)

higgle- @ being banned from an entire county!!! ;)
I am actually much too big for a bikini :o !! infact I have never worn one even as a young girl!

I think government public health campaigns have a lot to answer for. They've been taken as encouragment by nasty, stupid people who want to exercise their prejudices but realise racism might get them into trouble. These ill-mannered types use 'health concerns' as an excuse for being rude about people who are overweight - as if they can see at a glance who is healthy and unhealty. Plenty of people of normal weight and lower than normal weight are unhealthy, but the nasty people aren't interested in logic, they just want to insult someone.

It does seem to be acceptable to say that we are lazy, greedy, smelly, selfish people who take up far too much room wherever we go here on mumsnet. Not everyone of course thank goodness! :)

Support for larger women is a bit different. Yes if you go to S&B and ask for help finding a wedding outfit they'll be very helpful. It's when you take the issue out into the wider MN world and canvass opinions on overweight people, then it comes out.

As for the bikini thread, I saw some of that and it didn't ring true at all. Because I guarantee, if you searched the archives there would be a point and laugh thread somewhere about a woman in a bikini who, in their opinion, shouldn't have been.

I had the same on a leggings thread recently. I'm a size 22 and pregnant and bemoaned the fact that I'm too fat for leggings, even though they'd be super comfy and I'd wear a dress or tunic with them. Cue everyone telling me to wear what I like etc. If I started a thread today about seeing a size 22 woman in Tesco wearing leggings you can bet there'd be a flood of people joining in to point and laugh. I've seen it over and over again here.

Just reading this thread and nodding all through it!

6 years ago I put on weight due to a medical condition then couldn't lose it due to tablets I was on. During this time I was so ill while out with my sister took me to A&E and one of the Gynae Consultants actually said to me "lose some weight and you'll find yourself a nice husband"!! My (thin) sister couldn't believe how I was spoken to and it was hard to tell her that it's practically an everyday occurance.

1 year on, I married a gorgeous, kind man and we have an adorable 4 year old son. My husband loves me whatever the packaging so stick that in your pipe Dr Consultant!

Sewil :)