DS is sat in his room and not allowed to play.

[youarekidding]

He also thinks I've cancelled the holiday after pretend phonecall whilst stategically stood outside his bedroom.

I am finding him really difficult atm, thing is though he really isn't a naughty child and if asked to stop doing something he will. He is also quite passive and accepting of things and doesn't argue when I say 'we're doing x and then y and z this way'.

However he is just NOT engaging brain, doesn't seem to be treating anything with repsect and drawing on any bit of paper, packaging he see's when he has a draw full of it that I've made available to him.

The other day he was drawing a map and picked up his Infant school leavers assembly programme and began crossing out names and adding others. I told him he doesn't draw on anything without asking and he had ruined the last thing he has from Infant School. He had earlier on in the day takjen his leavers book into after school club - he is told repeatedly everything stays in his bag on the peg, because there's lots of children aged 4-12yo with free reign and it keeps things safe. He took it in left it by a sink and another child has soaked it by accident and it is ruined.

So today my mum takes him out and buys him a new scooter for holiday. I take it from box and put together, go to toilet and come back to find him drawing all over the box. OK, so not a biggy as it will go in the bin but I thought after ruining something important by the same actions he would heed my advice.

He had also taken again to coming to yell through the toilet door about needing food/ drink everytime I go. This morning he woke at 5:50am. I told him it was too early, to go to bed and watch a DVD and I would come and get him at 7.30am. 6.55am he comes in, sees I'm asleep so pokes and calls me repeatedly until I wake up wanting to know if he can have a chocolate from the box a pupil bought me. He knows this would not be allowed. If he had asked aproppriate time he would of been allowed but as it is he isn't having 1 at all all day today - I have told him this and explained why.

He gets lots of positive praise, but recently nothing is ever enough and as a struggling LP who's saved hard for 5 days away I'm really very sad.

AIBU to simply get him accept the pleasures he has or get nothing?

Sorry ranting a bit but at least I'm not yelling at him.

not the throwing away as in what I did but the drying out. The pages have stuck together though.

To be honest i find your behaviour very childish. You went and got your ds out of bed, let him eat all the chocolates etc, etc just to prove a point on MN.

Aww, OP, you sound knackered and in need of a holiday. I think you've had some harsh responses on here. I've had a shitty evening with DS (7) and DD (4) and ended up really telling them off, which resulted in tears all round. Sometimes it is hard and you just have had enough. DH has been away for a week now and that's been bad enough. I know I have too high expectations for DS and I am trying to be more realistic. He's a lovely little boy who can just be very silly like so many boys of that age. Just have a good night's sleep and tomorrow's another day when you can have a big cuddle. HAve a good holiday.

What does WUM mean?

I think the thread has got worse the longer it has gone on. To go and get your son out of bed, let him eat all the chocolates, do whatever he wants etc just to spite people on mn is pretty manic!

Ah TSC Thanks. I have seen other posters, rant here before and get sympathy and stupidly felt I may too. Seems I'm not 'one of those' posters though! I'm not a perfect parent I know that but I also know in my heart of hearts that despite the shittest day in a while I do not have a problem because I put my child in time out for 6 minutes. About an hour ago I was ready to suggest DS went to live with his AWOL father as already feeling like shit people made me feel worse. DS however had forgotten about the time out by 2pm

Do you know what, fuck it I'm going to say this as it can't be worse than some parents here have been to me.

But all the nasty and quite confidence cutting replies occured this afternoon while I was out with my 'bored, repressed, bullied' DS by supposedly perfect parents who never lose their temper who probably had their DC's at home at the time. The understanding replies have come from people who are MNing whilst their DC's are likely in bed and understand that it can be stressful providing hours of fun and engagement when you get your buttons pushed back.

You don't really need to ask what the middle ground is between no chocolate and all of it, surely? Please don't go to the other extreme just so you can come on here and say 'you guys made me do it'.

I give up.

Bluddy I'm not a WUM

I'm actually a very sane mum - read my other posts who's had a really bad day and put my DS in time out for 6 minutes. I then ranted on here and without all the details or it would have been an epic essay made it seem worse than it was. Like I said in my OP - I was ranting so I didn't shout at him.

I love my DS and would do anything for him. I would never intentionally harm him but I will make mistakes as I'm human. As all MNers are.

That poor poor child must be so damn confused

Bloody hope this is a fucking wind up

I dont she 'gets it' at all thesecondcoming. Its hard to be constructive, when someone is being so obtuse and i did have something to add, which is why i added it.

think

claw3 "I think the thread has got worse the longer it has gone on. To go and get your son out of bed, let him eat all the chocolates, do whatever he wants etc just to spite people on mn is pretty manic!"

Are you deliberatally missing the point? I came here ranting as not to shout at my DS who was in a 6 minute time out. A time out not locked in the cupboard. After a spectacualary bad week loads of parents came here when I was out with DS having fun calling me deranaged etc. I came back read the posts felt shitter and decided maybe I needed to lighten up. I got my awake and been in bed 5 minutes DS up, had milk and let him eat the rest of the milk tray - all 5 of them. You are chossing to make more of this than there is. Someone further up suggested being spontanious - I thought oh yes I haven;t done that for a while - good point. I did it, DS had a great night and fell asleep on the bean bag. I did not do it for MN I did it for my DS. I mentioned it here to show I had taken the advice.

oh FFS hes not a "poor poor child" hes a loved child whose mum in a moment of stress over reacted then got flamed for it and was made to feel so guilty she got him up and gave him some chocolate. Get off the phone to ss and have a all you little miss I'm so perfects.

OP dd DS leave any chocs for sharing with nice MNs

Im not deliberatally missing the point, your point has changed from one minute to the next and is confusing to say the least.

Anyhow as i said earlier, i give up.

I agree with claw3 the point keeps changing.
Think may a short think before a rant would do everyone the world of good.
OP you original post led most of us to believe he was there for the day over a chocolate. It is now we see it is not the case.
I am sorry you are having a bad day. We all have them. Relax, have a and enjoy your holiday.

No he's eaten them all. I ate 3 last night as being very good on my last minute pre holiday diet. The rest have been gobbled up by visitors we had last night as I offered them around to help my diet to be nice.

TBH I booked this holiday as his dad rang last month and invited DS to the wedding with me of course. There is no way we could go as money just wouldn't stretch that far (also DS dad rings 2 times a yr and never visits/pays) so I used the £40 I saved by not going on staff night out and the money I would usually pay childcare with (school hols so both home) to take him on holiday with. Got a great deal of £180 for 4 nights caravan holiday, pool, park, entertainment etc. I am going with my friend and her 3 DC's so we have split the cost.

He means everything to me, I wouldn't ever deliberatly hurt or upset him and was cross at myself for losing it. Made the mistake of coming here though. I'm still upset and tearful but tomorrows another day, although as I said since 2pm everything here has been fine.

You are back pedalling now.

You did not give your ds a time out.
You shut him in his room and told him he couldn't play, whilst you stood outside pretending to be on the phone cancelling his holiday.

And why? Because he drew on a cardboard box and asked for a chocolate an hour after waking.

I understand you are having a stressful week.
I'm the first to admit to over reacting to my dc's irritating behaviour when I'm feeling irritable.
You, however, are not admitting to, or recognising any fault or over reaction on your part. You are still trying to justify your actions.

To make it worse, you have got your child out of bed and given him a whole box of chocolates because a stranger on the Internet told you to be more spontaneous.

And to top it all, you accuse people who answered your AIBU thread of ignoring their children in favour of their computers.
If you are so convinced of your fantastic parenting skills don't ask strangers on net to critique you. Clearly everyone in your RL thinks you are fun fun fun, so ignore this thread and get on with your packing

OP. Here is the best advice you will ever hear. Switch your computer off. You are getting it tight IMHO and its not going to get any better. Have a bath, have a glass of wine, go for an early night - but STEP AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER. Hide the thread, let it go. And have a lovely holiday with a very un-MN hug from me.

I didn't mean to mislead anyone. I was ranting here so not at him. I'm sorry if it came across wrong. But people could have asked how long he was there for. I never said he was there for the day people just presumed the worst.

The question I asked was AIBU to expect him to except the pleasures he has or get nothing? That was the point. The point hasn't changed. I still think he should be grateful for the things I have done for him. The rest of the information has been in response to the posts. I accepted IWBU hours ago and did something fun and spontanious with DS as suggested to make up for it.

I really love my DS more than anything but there is a limit to what I can provide. When its not enough the guilt sets in - even when I know he's getting more than some other children do I will always have the guilt of walking outon his father (for good reason I might add) and the things he misses because of this.

I promise I will try harder not to get cross at the little things.

God I can't keep up with the replies.

morecrack The time out was for a whole load of things that happened and after a warning. I did not 'shut him in his room'. The door was open halfway but wouldn't open fully as his new scooter was behind the door.

Yes I overreacted to lots of small things, I knew that when I came here and have admitted it. I just put in my OP about the drawing on the box and said no biggy. I didn't mention in the OP it was with permanent marker that got on the carpet as I was trying to keep an already long post short iyswim?

Anyhow. On advice I will go to bed now. Thanks for the suggestions of but I don't drink. DS has anaphylaxic allergies and I worry if I had alcohol and anything happened I'd put him at unnecessary risk. See yep - uptight.