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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to thoroughly detest potty training?

130 replies

DMCWelshCakes · 22/07/2011 17:59

DiddyDragon is 2.10 and has been dry at nursery (pretty much) for a few months now. Sadly for us, she's refusing to cooperate at home. Today was day one of home toilet bootcamp & I'm completely fucked off with the whole thing already. She's obviously ready as does it no problem at nursery, so why the hell won't she replicate this success when she leaves there?

Accidents - 2, including one 30 seconds after promising faithfully she didn't need to go.

Successful use of toilet - zero.

This would seem to suggest she's deliberately holding it so as not to have to go.

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

OP posts:

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 22/07/2011 17:59

I hated every minute of it. Huge sympathies.

DontCallMePeanut · 22/07/2011 18:02

You'll get there eventually. Have you tried letting her run around bare bum? worked wonders for DS. Rather than asking if she needs the toilet, take her every x minutes.

Original poster

DMCWelshCakes · 22/07/2011 18:09

I've been taking her every 30 minutes (exactly the same tactic as the nursery) but although she'll sit on the toilet, she won't actually do anything. I think bare bum may be the way forward for tomorrow, at least until our house guests arrive.

OP posts:

catwoman2011 · 22/07/2011 19:47

We've just been through this.

I have a dry DD who doesn't ask me or her key workers for the toilet, she just goes and then gets herself in a pickle!

We started by going cold turkey from the training pants. It is much easier to change wet trousers than those stupid pants.

I put the potty in the living room with us and chose some films to watch. We played some games and every hour, I sat her on the potty. I counted to 20 (slowly) and if she sat there for that time she got a sticker on her chart. If she did something whilst there, she got a smiley face sticker too.

By the end of 2 days she was taking herself and by the end of the week she was asking to go (but not always).

Now she asks for a book and sits there for quite a while lol.

I thought she would never be dry before she was 3 but she is dry through the night as well!!!!

Going cold turkey was the best thing I could ever do but not until she was 2.10..........

shakey1500 · 22/07/2011 19:52

Sympathy. I went cold turkey, straight on the toilet, bare bum or pants. A thousand wees on my (thankfully) wooden floors. Had a stack of spare pants on the table, forever washing. Still not there for nightime but I can handle that!

IlanaK · 22/07/2011 19:59

We are potty training this week too. My ds3 just turned three yesterday, we started with bare bum and potty in the living room and lots of tv. By day 3 he was reliably taking myself to the potty when he needed it. So then we added pants which meant he needed to ask me when he needed a wee so I could help take them off. This was day 2 of that and all is fine. We have been out n the tube (London) and I put thicker cloth training pants on him but he was fine. Tomorrow the plan is to transfer to the toilet from the potty so by Monday we will be done!

lukewarmmama · 22/07/2011 20:07

Yanbu

potty training = second only to newborn hell IMO (closely followed by the pain in the neck that is weaning)

a subtle combination of bribery and nonchalance is the way forward

SmethwickBelle · 22/07/2011 20:10

what lukewarmmama said

Meglet · 22/07/2011 20:18

Yanbu. DD is nearly 3 and we've already had one aborted attempt. I'm tempted to have another go this weekend but I hate staying at home all day to do it.

And when they're potty trained its a PITA as you're always having to take them to skanky public toilets .

NickNacks · 22/07/2011 20:18

I hate it too!

I'm a CM and have to tackle it roughly once a year! My poor house.

Original poster

DMCWelshCakes · 22/07/2011 20:19

Oh God. Weaning. DiddyCakes is still only 10 weeks old. I have to go through weaning again!

OP posts:

joric · 22/07/2011 20:19

You have got me thinking, I didnt potty train DD.. At all . she continued to wear pull ups until they were dry all day ( 2.5- 3 ) and she wore night time ones until she was about 5 (!!) anyway, she seemed to just come to it eventually is what I'm trying to say.. Didn't have a clue what we were doing.. I'm a bad mum!!! :)

IlanaK · 22/07/2011 20:22

Ugh yes....the public toilets. But it does make life easier in the long run ( that's what I keep telling myself anyway!)

Original poster

DMCWelshCakes · 22/07/2011 20:39

NickNacks I don't know how you cope.

I just keep telling myself it'll be easier & cheaper. And she'll get teased far less at university if she's potty trained by then.

OP posts:

NickNacks · 22/07/2011 20:57

I don't cope. I stress about it a lot! And moan to DH.

PinkSchmoo · 22/07/2011 21:37

It sucks sucks sucks. DD is not quite 2.4 and decided she won't wear a nappy so I have no fucking choice. It's been a long week with her so apologies for cursing. DS is 11wo and has reflux. Broke my toe so can't walk. Having champagne to celebrate surviving. Need to head to bed soon though as DS is bound to surface soon and I think he is crying my name I'm so bloody sleep deprived.

Dancergirl · 22/07/2011 21:50

So don't do it!

I really fail to understand why parents put themselves through this 'staying at home for a week to crack it' business. Hell, there's enough to stress about as it is without getting stressed over potty training.

Wait till the child's ready. My 3 children are 10, 8 and 4 and all became dry at different ages (and dry at night at different ages). I've NEVER stayed at home to potty train them.

OP - in answer to your question 'why won't she replicate this success at home' - because it's a fun game making Mummy all stressed about it. Chill out, so she's not dry at home, big deal. Another few months and she probably will be.

happywheezer · 22/07/2011 21:55

I have a newborn and trying to potty train. DS has just turned 3 and was waiting for the summer and not to be pregnant anymore.
My rented house smells of wee .I feel we are not getting anywhere.

RhinestoneCowgirl · 22/07/2011 21:58

DD started potty training in April, think we are finally there (touching wood cautiously). She is now 2.7yrs and I only started with it as she was refusing to wear a nappy, and was holding wee for hours and hours at a time.

It got really bad about 6 weeks ago when we went to stay at my mums and she just kept pissing on the floor (after insisting that she didn't need to go). Went against all my parenting instincts and bought a pack of chocolate buttons to bribe her back on to the potty. We've now phased the 'treats' out (sometimes she has a sticker instead, when she remembers) and she asks to go to the loo. No accidents this week - yay!

Makes me realise how easy her older brother was, similar ages but completely different experience!

joric · 22/07/2011 22:00

Happywheezer! I love your first sentence I have a newborn and trying to potty train!!!

hubbard86 · 22/07/2011 22:03

you have my support. Have been potty training my 2.8 ds fun not. We're fine out and about but having trouble with poo's in the potty/loo. We went totally cold turkey only having pull ups on at night. She'll get it eventually just don't give up

Cattleprod · 22/07/2011 22:17

It's the absolute worst part of parenting so far. I hate it and I'm very tempted to just keep him in nappies until he's 8 and can pick it up straight away!

It's the constant saying he needs to wee, then you go through all the kerfuffle of taking him to the toilet (several times) only for him to sit there for 5 seconds, say 'finished', then 2 minutes later, wet himself. The playing with himself while on the toilet making it impossible for him to actually go (so I'm told), the having to know where the nearest public toilet is. The style of underwear that seems to be the norm for little boys (briefs) that makes me feel a bit nauseous. The fact that you don't just have to change wet pants, but also wet trousers, socks, shoes, t-shirt, so you can't leave the house without a huge bag of clothes. And don't get me started on poos!

Original poster

DMCWelshCakes · 23/07/2011 10:57

So apparently I'm not alone in my hatred of the process then.

I wouldn't have started with it now at all (life's hard enough with a newborn as it is) but DiddyDragon had other ideas.

Dancergirl There is much in what you say, which is why I've been keeping very calm with her & ranting on MN. She's definitely attention seeking & pushing boundaries now her baby brother has arrived.

Cattleprod 8 you say? I was thinking more along the lines of high school...

OP posts:

happywheezer · 24/07/2011 23:02

My son is very advanced for a newborn!
Actually I think it would be easier to potty train him rather than the 3 year old. NB hates being dirty.
It looks like I was holding NB when writing the thread too.

MrBloomsNursery · 24/07/2011 23:07

Started my DD when she was 3 - was potty trained within a week and dry at night within 7 months. Still aged 3.

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