aibu to think that mate selling wedding dress so shortly after wedding strange?

[Wamster]

My mate married last October in a full-on white wedding. I spoke to her friday and she announced she was now selling dress. It is a beautiful dress - a proper fairytale number. AFAIK, there are no financial difficulties. I worry for my mate as I think this is a bit strange. aibu? Not thread hitting and running, just going out and won't be able to get back to thread for a while.

I know somebody who had sold on her dress on eBay even before she wore it for her own wedding.

OP, this seems to be about you and some form of resentment rather than your friend's marriage. I don't get it at all.

Hmmmm. you sound like a lovely friend

OP, what ate you on?

You are coming across as a complete loon now!!

You think she is a chav? Because she sold her wedding dress?

I really can't understand what is going through your head. Yes, it sounds as if she was a right bridezilla. But now that's all over, and she is doing the normal thing. If this bothers you so much, stop pretending concern for her marriage and tell her you're cross you were a doormat and she was a bridezilla. She'lll probably think you're nuts for bottling it up for nine months, mind.

Wamster, the dress cost her DDad 20,000.00 (HE insisted on spending a fortune on his only DD wedding and she had to have it quick as he had been diagnosed with cancer) My mate sold the dress for almost what her dad had paid and funded a 6month cruise for both her and her new DH, and her parents all together, he died the month they returned. So yes, money well spent, it was her dads dream to give his only daughter the day of her life, he'd saved his whole working life for it. He was a very proud man. He died achieving his dream and after a fabulous time with the two most important people in his life, (and his new Son inlaw). Classy, actually yes, she found a way to let her dad have his wish and gave him the holiday of a life time and to thank him with before he died. i think my friend is a real class act.

This is one of the funniest threads I ever read! OP, what's really bothering you? You don't seem remotely interested in what people have to say about the dress, you're getting angry at people for expressing opinions and you seem to be slagging off someone who thought you were a good enough friend to be a bridesmaid. What's your real gripe? I just can't believe you'd get so wound up over someone else's dress!

You're posting pretty creepy stuff wamster, totally inappropriate level of anger for something that's got fuck all to do with you.

Why are you so caught up in the dress?

You seem to begrudge the time/money you spent on her wedding and are thinking she's throwing it back in your face somehow by getting rid of the dress.

Baby, she sounds lovely.

I actually think it is less 'classy' (eugh, horrible word) to keep a dress you won't use. I get why people do, we all get sentimental about something - but this must be the first time I've heard someone called chavvy for doing what's economically and environmentally the good option!

X posts baby dubs. I'mm

You think she's a chav?

OP - I was going to spring to your defence as I still have my wedding dress after 30+ years, but I'm afraid even I think you have become a bit weird. What will matter to your friend will be her memories of the day and how she looks in the photos. The dress has no further role to play - might as well sell it. For info - my dress was cheap and doesn't take up much room - it wasn't a "wedding" dress, just a dress - blue, in fact.

Zig, how long d'you reckon we wait for a big dramatic confession? I reckon about two pages from now we'll have one of these:

a) OP admits she has been concealing mad passionate unrequited love for the groom.
b) OP admits she has been concealing mad passionate unrequited love for the bride.
c) OP admits her DH made her walk down the aisle in burlap and turned her down at the altar for a stunningly beautiful lady of aristocratic foreign birth.

Any bets?

Mine was eaten by rats, I didn't give a stuff

However it was not an expensive dress.

Having a big white wedding is all very good, but at least have the grace NOT to use it as an excuse to make money later on down the line. OK, not my style, but at least I can see that some women do think a lot of it and I can relate to them keeping their old wedding dress for their grandchildren to look at. Like, I say not my style, but it has a bit of class to it.
Similarly, having a cheapo wedding also has a bit of style to it in its own way.

Having an ostentatious wedding and then selling the dress down the line to make a profit when not financially desperate or because of marital breakdown (in either case, fair enough) is chavvy. Sorry, but it is.

Handing it on to a beloved relative/friend has grace, flogging it on e-bay is just low.

'low' - why? Do we like in some kind of medieval barter economy and no-one's told me?

Selling the wedding dress isn't making a profit (well I suppose it could be if she sold it for more than she paid but it seems unlikely), it's just reclaiming some of the costs.

The way you are reacting you're making it sound like she had a wedding just to make some money which is frankly ludicrous

Ooh now I've read some of the rest of the thread and realised this is no longer about a dress.

eek

OP your rules for a stylish/non-stylish approach to weddings are quite complex. You clearly attach a lot more signficance to the dress than she does (did) - could you buy it back somehow?

You could put it on on their anniversary and break into her garden and skulk around in the shrubbery - the Ghost Of Marriage Clearly Doomed - that would give her a shock when she came down in the morning.

Look on the bright side - at least you didn't have to watch the dress being devoured by rats!!!

Of course it is low, the bride gets everybody to help for the 'special day', most important day of her life (not my view, btw, but her view), emotionally blackmails people into helping andthinking this is a major event, people spend a small fortune on gifts, hotels, travel, babysitters etc etc and what does the bride do after the wedding? Flog the bloody dress. Charming.

?

Bonkers.

and [alarmed]

I'd much rather sell my wedding dress out of choice/common sense than because my marriage was breaking down or I was 'financially desperate', personally.

Wamster, did she force you to do this stuff with a gun to the head? And did she feed you, give you a good time, hope you'd celebrate wiih her?

I can totally understand you feeling fed up that she was a bridezilla and you didn't manage to say no to her demands. But you're an adult woman and she''s not even a family member: you could have said no. Being this angry so long afterwards is just not healthy. Let it go.

Is this for real? You're starting to sound unhinged!