To treat my daughter the (younger) age she acts?

[NotaDisneyMum]

DD10 tried to sneak the uneaten crusts from her school lunchbox into the rubbish bin without me seeing AGAIN today - she knows full well that I expect food to be eaten, not wasted.

I have told her that the next time I find out it happens - I'll give her a packed lunch suitable for a much younger child; one of an age who I'd accept leaving their crusts.

We've had sulks, stomps and 'it's not fair'.

AIBU? Tbh, it wouldn't bother me if she managed to work out that she can chuck them away at school (I'm guessing that the staff won't let her) but bringing them home and throwing them away infront of me really irks -

[Fifis25StottieCakes]

Yabu - if you dont want her to leave her crusts buy bread with no crusts

www.kingsmillbread.com/products/bread/crusts-away?p=crusts-away-great-everyday-white

[Tchootnika]

breadrolls? - what, crusty ones? That would be VERY unreasonable indeed. Poor kid...

[izzywhizzyletsgetbusy]

There's nothing nicer than fresh crusty bread, verity, but the non-crust on most supermarket bread is only fit for the bin or the birds unless it's destined to become toast or breadcrumbs.

[mumnotmachine]

The cheap bread is minging for sandwiches but makes fab breadcrumbs for stuffing balls, yum!!

[Catsu]

My pet hate is making kids eat everything when they are full/dislike it to avoid 'waste'.
Much more of a 'waste' to give your children a complex/eating disorder rather than chuck out a bit of unwanted food imo!!

[HSMM]

I always had to eat my crusts as a child and I leave them now (as long as no-one is watching). My DD didn't like them, so I skimmed the very edge of the bread off, so she had crustless sandwiches, but only lost a couple of mm all the way around - now she has reached puberty, she just seems to be so hungry that she just eats the lot (crusts and all) without thinking about it. When eating alone, I just tend to use the crusts as handles, not food ... and I like to cut my sandwiches in triangles, so each one only has 1 crust .

[NotaDisneyMum]

Ok - an alternative solution I will try negotiating with her:

She makes her sandwiches in the mornings, cuts the crusts off and pops them into the freezer for breadcrumbs.

To respond to a few specific questions; it's homemade bread, she asked for sandwiches rather than the pittas I used to give her and IMO, she only gets to pick and choose what she eats if/when she pays for it.

Oh and a toddlers packed lunch would include mini pitas, veg sticks, a jungle yoghurt and a novelty cake

[manicmummyoftwo]

I think as a mum you pick your battles and non-eating of crusts isn't one of them. After attending a 'lunch with parents' with my DS I could see that it was the urgency to get in the play ground and play footie that was preventing him from eating everything I gave him - and crusts take longer to chew!! I now cut the top and bottom crusts off (but leave the sides on) and everything now gets eaten. Also no waste as I give him the crusts to eat when I am making the lunch!

I would have a chat about how disappointed you are that she is being 'sneaky'.

[FabbyChic]

You KNOW she doesn't like them, some don't CUT THEM OFF so she doesn't have to leave them.

[FabbyChic]

She is a child, your attitude to what she eats appals me.

My mum used to feed us food that made us gag cos we hated it.

I vowed never to give my children food they detested and would not eat, to do so would be a waste and not fair on my kids.

[JamieAgain]

See, I don't think she's being that sneaky. I think she's trying to assert herself, and you need to listen. And I think your compromise sounds like a good one.

I have a 10 year old as well and I think rigidity at this age will backfire later

[mumnotmachine]

Do you really make a 10yo pay for food that she wants?

Does she have any say in what she eats?
Theres things that I love that my family wouldnt touch with a bargepole- I would never make them eat it just because I do all the shopping/buying/cooking

Alternatively theres stuff they like which I dont- same applies, I wont eat it just because they do.

I was made to eat everything and always vowed never to make food an issue when I had my own family.

[thisisyesterday]

with that attitude notadisneymum you are just ASKING for her to have an eating disorder.

[pigletmania]

YABU my dh does not eat crusts. You cannot force your dd to eat it. why not buy bread for her with crusts off

[pigletmania]

The number of times i have had to chuck food in the bin, noway could i force dd 4 to eat it. You really run the risk of creating issues with food for your dd if you continue this, just have a relaxed approach to it.

[pigletmania]

Making your dd aged 10 pay for her food if she chooses it! . Don't you want her to enjoy food. If the answer is yes, allow her to choose the stuff that she takes in her packed lunch, if the answer is no, you are creating problems for yourself and her.

[redwineformethanks]

give the crusts to the birds

[messymammy]

Realistically,how much do the crusts off the bread cost? It's hardly that much waste is it? Pick your battles op!

[Pandemoniaa]

I'd be very cautious about the potential for your dd to develop an eating disorder if you are so ferocious about crusts that she has to dispose of them surreptitiously. It's not a crime to dislike crusts, y'know, nor uncommon.

Why not make her crustless sandwiches and give the crusts to the birds? Or make breadcrumbs out of them yourself? Either way, there are far better battles to fight so I'd pick one that mightn't have such damaging consequences.

[exoticfruits]

At 10yrs old why not let her make her own packed lunch and then she would have something she wanted?

[CurrySpice]

Excellent idea to make your child sneak and lie about food to avoid a totally ott reaction from you

It's the crusts fgs. She happens not to like them. Wouldn't it be more sensible to stop giving her something you know she doesn't like day in day out. We all have good preferences and, so long as it's a genuine dislike, and not unreasonable what is the point of having a battle about it?

You sound very inflexible and dogmatic

[CurrySpice]

Good preferences = food preferences

[kreecherlivesupstairs]

I don't like crusts and nor does DD. She wasn't allowed to throw them away at school so took to hiding them under the seat in the car.
I found a small mountain of dried bread rind when I was giving the car its annual hoovering.