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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

In thinking it's strange not to want me at his house?

295 replies

LoweredBrows · 17/06/2011 12:09

Been with DP 2 years. I moved in with him briefly last year as I had nowhere else to stay (landlord of my house went bankrupt etc) but he moved again and I took over the tenancy of his house. So we do have a lot of history, it's certainly not a new relationship. I helped him move etc and stayed the night at his new house so I know he didn't move in with another woman or anything. Since then though he's been really funny about me going to his house. The only time he's ok with it is if I give him plenty of notice (like a few days notice).
A while ago he invited me around (this is very rare) during the day, he made me lunch etc and I put my shopping in his freezer but I forgot to take it home, not realising until later. I text him saying I'd pop around for my stuff and he was all like "No no, I'll bring it to you". So I told him I was going passed his house anyway so I might as well just pick it up and he made excuse after excuse and in the end insisted that he bring it to me???

Same thing happened again with something else, I said I'd pop in after work and pick it up. He protested, made excuses, acted strange but I pushed it this time because I was starting to wonder what he was up to and in the end he agreed but wanted a specific time in which I'd be there.

He bought me a cake a couple of days ago. Came around to my house but forgot it. I said "No worries, I'm going passed your house tonight on the way to the opticians, I'll pick it up" so he went on with his excuses, trying to get out of it, saying he'd bring it to me, even tried to say he'd drop it in at 5am on his way to work!! I was like "err no, that's just stupid, I'll just pick it up" so reluctantly he agreed but again wanted a specific time and text me an hour before to ask if I was still going and would it be the same time still. I was in a shit mood when he text so I replied saying "actually no, I have to much on tonight, sorry. I'll pick it up tomorow when I leave work". He agreed and seemed relieved. SO I was supposed to be picking it up this afternoon and I've just had a text saying he's leaving work early so will go home, pick up the cake and come back to mine to drop it off!! this is really going out of his way!! why?? I know for a fact he's not married lol, so why the urgency in keeping me away from his house?

OP posts:
RollingInTheAisles · 17/06/2011 21:02

Classic even... That's Mumsnet, turning everything class related!

meltedchocolate · 17/06/2011 21:04

Sounds to me like is extremely messy and ashamed. Living with you was probably a nightmare if he saw you were clean all the time. I MUST know when people are coming round so I can tidy up.

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 17/06/2011 21:16

I hear you Pudding. It'll be Krispys to go - both ways.

And if we take a bucket of water along for the ride we can turn the OP's ex-dp into a fleeting facsimile of Mr Darcy, and deliver him to her place if required.

Synchronise watches, everyone?

Jellykat · 17/06/2011 21:25

Having just read the whole 10 pages, i'm bloody dying to know why this bloke is behaving so oddly now, count me in izzy.. Couldn't bare it if this turned into another 'Cool box/ man with clipboard' thread, still pondering that one.

Hope he's a tidy upper, and not uppernother (sic - apologies OP but it is Friday!)

WhereYouLeftIt · 17/06/2011 21:25

I could be wrong, but I suspect that if you turn up there unexpectedly, you won't find another woman there. But you won't find your 'DP' there either. I don't think he lives there. He has access to it (a friend's house perhaps, who's away and wants an eye kept on it), but you only contact him on his mobile, never the landline, correct?

With advance notice, he can make sure he's in there before you, milk in the fridge etc.

Why did he move out after you moved in, OP? Was it already planned before you moved in?

meltedchocolate · 17/06/2011 21:39

Shock That's a good idea Where!

StealthPolarBear · 17/06/2011 21:42

Hope you are OK OP

Orbinator · 17/06/2011 22:21

Another one here hoping you are OK.

LineRunner · 17/06/2011 22:24

Me too. Hoping OP is all right.

turdass · 17/06/2011 22:38

So what's happening? Has she stalked him yet?

wandawings · 17/06/2011 22:42

Marking my place.

thenightsky · 17/06/2011 22:51

Come back OP... give us update.

LineRunner · 17/06/2011 22:54

The OP hasn't been back for a long while. I had wondered if she was upset by the light dusting of mirth sprinkled by a few giddy posters.

Maybe she just got fed up.

Isitreally · 17/06/2011 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hocuspontas · 17/06/2011 23:17

I agree - I think it's a second home. Hope OP's ok.

LeChatRouge · 17/06/2011 23:19

I am feeling a bit down and this thread has made me laugh out loud 3 times!

I very much doubt she'll come back, reminds me of the recent one with the person finding her DH on the sofa with another woman - it went off on a heated tangent and probably put her off for life - did she ever reply? If so, I missed the ending.

Loweredbrows if you are reading this, I really hope you are ok and you get the answers you are hoping for. Sometimes you have to get rid of the old to make space for the new to come into your life.

thenightsky · 18/06/2011 08:53

OP are you home yet? If you aren't, I hope you are at his, having stayed the night and all is well.

YellowDinosaur · 18/06/2011 10:59

Hope you're OK this am OP.

Hope you haven't been put off by the banter and that you have in fact spent the night with your dp having sorted all this out. fingers crossed...

TheOriginalFAB · 18/06/2011 13:25

LCR - I never saw the end of that either and hope the OP is okay.

Pumpernickel10 · 18/06/2011 13:43

I doubt she will be back so asking her if she's ok and for an update just ain't gonna happen. So move on folks :)

turdass · 18/06/2011 13:44

Awwww!

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 18/06/2011 13:53

Just another tale of mystery and suspense, or an OP who's reluctant to find out the truth for fear of bursting her bubble

whatsallthehullaballoo · 18/06/2011 20:08

I cannot NOT know the answer to this riddle

Where are you OP? What Happened????

TotallyLovely · 18/06/2011 20:45

About bookmarks again . . . I've made a bookmark but how do I get back to it?

Tuggy · 18/06/2011 20:57

Argh it's been 24 hours since she was going to drop in! where is our update