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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To dislike the culture of alcohol worship on MN?

320 replies

MumblingRagDoll · 07/06/2011 17:45

I know it's all lighthearted....but I find it icky. Not people saying ..have a Wine to cheer someone up so much...but all the "Just waiting till' wine o clock statements get to me.
I think it's because a close relative is an acoholic and I have seen the damage.

Alcohol is such a damaging thing...and I'm genuinely surprised (and yes...judgey) about how many parents seem to rely on it every night.

OP posts:
Earlybird · 07/06/2011 19:21

Both my parents were alcoholics. Both denied it, saying by way of explanation/justification:

  • I don't have a drink before 5.
  • I can stop whenever i want, and some days don't drink at all (iirc, this was only when visiting grandparents who were teetotal)
  • Just because I drink alot every day doesn't mean I'm an alcoholic

I absolutely think it is possible to drink socially on a regular basis without being an alcoholic. But ime, most alcoholics vehemently deny they have a problem, and respond defensively/angrily/aggressively/tearfully when questioned about it.

jesuswhatnext · 07/06/2011 19:21

x purposes bupcakes, i was thinking of the the damage caused by drunk drivers and the shit-faced twats who cause so much mayhem at closing time! - we are all perfectly entitled to sit at home and have a glass of wine! (but not me! Grin)

meltedchocolate · 07/06/2011 19:21

People get defensive because it sounds like an accusation of addiction. 'need'. which no one wants to be tarred with.

Funtimewincies · 07/06/2011 19:22

Of course agentzigzag Grin.

Some days I'm 'desperate' for a drink because I know that it relaxes me quickly. However if there is no booze in the house, I'll be disappointed (and kicking myself for lack of forward planning Grin) but will have a cup of tea instead, not really a big deal.

As exoticfruits says, most of us can regulate our intake.
Women - know your limits (to quote Harry Enfield) Grin!

AgentZigzag · 07/06/2011 19:23

I can't be arsed to read through the posts again, but I didn't notice anyone getting abusive mumbling.

But I don't like being (generally, I know you didn't direct anything at me specifically) accused of being defensive about my drinking habits when I'm answering the OP and saying I couldn't give a fig what other people do or think of my drinking.

That's not being defensive, it's saying what I think, and I refuse to justify myself to anyone.

The way I use alcohol hasn't changed in 15 odd years, so I doubt I'd suddenly tip over into being an alcoholic.

I'm not in some kind of denial, I don't like the taste of it enough to drink more, or the feeling of being shitfaced/hangover.

It works for me and I presume it's the same for other people.

meltedchocolate · 07/06/2011 19:24

Like now, DS in bed, time for a coffee (a drug too really) to wind down :)

bupcakesandcunting · 07/06/2011 19:25

I totally agree with you on that score, Jesus. I just think that irresponsible drinkers might get the rest of us tarred by people like the OP as being reckless dipsos.

jesuswhatnext · 07/06/2011 19:25

funtimes - i would love to be like you but when i was drinking i would have gone to any lengths to get it, a cup of tea just would not have been on the agenda!

youarekidding · 07/06/2011 19:25

I don't drink. I offer and have been offered virtual wine on here .

I have never worried or even really thought much beyond what's written here about wine o clock etc. For example if someone writes 'opened the wine already' I just smile and think enjoy, and open a can of pepsi max Grin

TheFlyingOnion · 07/06/2011 19:26

fuck this thread is making me want a drink and its only Tuesday

I'm going to have a Brew. See, I'm not alcoholic Grin

Primalscream · 07/06/2011 19:30

( hands theflyingonion a large one )

BimboNo5 · 07/06/2011 19:30

I love drinking and occassionally I love getting utterly pissed. No addiction going on just good old drunkard times! Wine

TheFlyingOnion · 07/06/2011 19:31

primal you're an enabler!

jesuswhatnext · 07/06/2011 19:31

no bupcakes, i dont think mumsnet is full of irresponsible drinkers and im often howling with laughter at some comments made with cats bums mouths about drinking at dcs parties etc (often the only way to cope with them is to do it pissed! Grin) but honestly, having read some threads i do think there are quite a few posters in denial about their drinking habits, the longer im sober the more i see it and it worries me - i have been through absloute hell to get to the calm place im in now and i suppose i get a bit evangelical Blush (sorry!) just dont like to see people on a slippery slope really!

Al0uiseG · 07/06/2011 19:32

Those of you who don't drink, how do you switch your brain off? Sometimes I prefer to not think and just zone out.

Maryz · 07/06/2011 19:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Primalscream · 07/06/2011 19:33

Where's expat with the drugs?

Funtimewincies · 07/06/2011 19:34

jesuswhatnext - do you believe that some people (genetic reasons or otherwise) are more likely to abuse alcohol?

I have a very high tolerance for alcohol, particularly as I'm only 5' not not very heavy, so could drink a lot, but something kicks in which says 'right, that's probably enough' and I'm wondering why that is for some and not others.

Honeybee79 · 07/06/2011 19:37

I switch my brain off by going for a run/having a shag/reading a good book/having some nice food. I do miss drink. I really do. And if I knew I could stop at one or two glasses then I'd still drink.

I guess booze led me to some horrible places. I have a son now and I would never forgive myself if I went there again.

jesuswhatnext · 07/06/2011 19:40

alouise - honest to god, my mind is sooo much calmer now, i feel almost serene! Grin, i can do so much to relax, things i never did because i was always too pissed, i like pottering in the kitchen, i bake, i sew, i go to dance classes the list is endless, it may not be up your street but when i was drinking i didnt really relax with it at all, i was jittery, didnt sleep (passed out sometimes but thats not the same) felt rough all the time etc - i just find i have 'time' now, its a lovely feeling!

Original poster
MumblingRagDoll · 07/06/2011 19:42

But what is the weekly allowance for a woman? 14 a weeks...in a bottle of wine there is around 9 units... If you take a lot of people on here literally about their alcohol consumption, they're drinking mroe than is safe. And that IS up to them...of course it is...but I think it's unhealthy to crow about it like it's ok.

OP posts:
TheFlyingOnion · 07/06/2011 19:43

I'm a size 26

crow crow crow

Original poster
MumblingRagDoll · 07/06/2011 19:43

Alouisegg switch off with a cup of coffee or tea and a little clutch of my pearls.

Sometimes a book...or a crap show on TV...chocolate...a laugh....whatever.

OP posts:
Original poster
MumblingRagDoll · 07/06/2011 19:44

Good for you Onion.

Doe it make you able to consume more alcohol safely or something?

OP posts:
jesuswhatnext · 07/06/2011 19:44

funtimes - i have no idea if im right, but it does seem to me to be genetic, my parents are heavy drinkers and we were bought up in a drinking envrionment (not awful, very 'middle-class' gin and tonic and good wine type of thing) - a great many of the people i have met at AA say the same and i have been reading lately about native americans and aboriganies (sp?) they seem to have no tolerance at all!