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AIBU?

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Original poster

Just found my husband with someone else.

748 replies

morewinevicar · 06/06/2011 23:08

I walked straight out, but have nowhere to go. No stuff. My little boy is asleep in the house. I was away on a course but couldn't stand to stay at the rubbish travel lodge for the night so drove for hours and just got home. Andmy husband was on the sofa with a woman. Very blonde but didn't see much else and they were drinking and looked like they'd just jumped apart when they heard the door. I'm shaking. I don't know where to go. My son is in the house. How could he?????

OP posts:
Boozilla · 07/06/2011 20:08

Good God that's cold. Lean on your friends lovey, lean on the people here who are thinking of you and are offering some good advice. I felt totally sick reading that message he sent so I can hardly imagine how you must be feeling.

You are doing a fantastic job of keeping yourself together. My hat is off to you. Look at your little boy and remember what an amazing mum you are. Your H is clearly a total loser.

Thinking of you!

bubbleymummy · 07/06/2011 20:08

Thinking of you and still sending you strength and support to help you get through this. Your friend sounds lovely. I'm really glad someone is with you in real life.

CheerfulYank · 07/06/2011 20:10

Wow, he is terrible. I can't imagine how you must be feeling, I would be totally gutted.

You're doing amazingly and he doesn't deserve you.

FakePlasticTrees · 07/06/2011 20:11

Another offering support but not real advice other than take time to process the information, don't do anything too rash.

HarrietJones · 07/06/2011 20:20

Shock how cold.

Hold it in while he is there. Be as cool as possible. Take it from someone who screws things up by shoutingBlush

CurrySpice · 07/06/2011 20:20

Goodness me what a horrible shock :(

I hope you are OK and he has been suitably contrite :(

I think portofino's line was spot on to say to him "I can't even look at you right now, I am so angry and disappointed and hurt, much less talk to you. Go away and I will contact you in a few days when I've had time to work out how to kill you without leaving any evidence behind calm down. I expect you to be at your mother's. If I find that you have been with her then all bets are off. HTH"

I would tet that to him.

Keep on keeping on morewine

CurrySpice · 07/06/2011 20:20

text

IWantToBeAFairyWhenIGrowUp · 07/06/2011 20:22

Another checking for an update. I can't believe how cold he's being. Hope you are ok.

statueofliberty · 07/06/2011 20:27

Thinking of you so much. You are so strong,sound like a fantastic woman.credit to your DS. Hope things go ok with H.

Fisharefriendsnotfood · 07/06/2011 20:30

Hope you are okay vicar

Soozey1 · 07/06/2011 20:31

Thinking of you Vicar....hope you're ok....

ThenameisBlack · 07/06/2011 20:31

Thinking of you x

sourpastels · 07/06/2011 20:35

Thinking of you. Hope you are ok (As ok as you can be)

IfYoureHappyAndYouKnowIt · 07/06/2011 20:36

Hope you are ok. You are doing fantastically, all things considered.

I wouldn't read much into his text.

It could be read as cold.

It could equally mean that he's in total shock and doesn't feel given what he's done that he has the right to say much more than I will get my things.

Whatever he meant, I think that he need to stay away from you for now and give you some time.

PeachyPossum · 07/06/2011 20:36

Words fail me on this one. What a brilliant friend you have though.

Thinking of you x

honeybee007 · 07/06/2011 20:37

Thinking of you x

CatPower · 07/06/2011 20:39

You, your friend and her DH are amazing. Thinking of you. x

ChateauNeufDePape · 07/06/2011 20:40

Another one wanting to wish you luck. Am horrified for you, but your dignity is awe-inspiring. x

perfumedlife · 07/06/2011 20:41

The text says he's either very cold or very cowardly, neither a great attribute to add to unfaithfulness and lying.

Thinking of you.

UrsulaBuffay · 07/06/2011 20:43

Thinking of you too.

TurkeyBurgerThing · 07/06/2011 20:44

What a horrible, horrible little scrotum of a man. I do hope on your behalf that he gets a very nasty uncurable bout of cock rot.

As for the woman who he was with....well that's someone who obviously has high morals! Wonder what he said to woo her "oh my wife is away, come round after 7.30 when my DS will be in bed and we can have a fuck" Nice. Is he one of these text talk people? Maybe it was more like this "OMG lol!!! U r so fit. Fancy a Fuk? Wud u lk 2 cum round l8tr lol lol!?!! Show me ur tits!!! lol"

Poor you and poor DS. How awful. Please do take care of yourself at this time and as the fog starts to gradually lift. Sounds like you are surrounded by good friends.

Gaaargh men like this make me so angry. What a CUNT.

MeRightYouWrongMeBigYouSmall · 07/06/2011 20:44

OP - when things get tough, try to find a moment to read back through these messages of support!

You may be numb at the moment, or perhaps functioning on autopilot, try to be strong and don't make any rash decisions.

Glad that you have a wonderful friend with you.

Thinking of you...x

Eglu · 07/06/2011 20:44

Good grief what a twat. He is not even going to try and apologise or anything. I can't believe the only contact he has had with you since last night and all he wrote was that.

MooMooFarm · 07/06/2011 20:45

Just stumbled upon your thread morewine and wanted to say I'm so sorry about what you're going through. Your H sounds like a spineless coward as well as a lying cheat - you deserve so much better.

Don't feel you have to allow him anything at the moment. If you can't face seeing him, don't allow him in the house ATM. He has made this situation, not you.

Thinking of you.

smokinaces · 07/06/2011 20:46

Hope things went ok. Been thinking about you