to expect the guest I invited over not to send the nanny as a substitute?

[sabretoothtiger]

I hate posting in this category but am genuinely interested in whether my reaction is unreasonable.

DD1 is friends with a girl at school. DS is also friends with her brother. They all get on well but we haven't yet had any occasion to invite them over to play. I know the parents to chat to if I bumped into them but again not particularly well.

DD1 has been asking for the friend to come and play and so I sent a text asking if the mother would like to bring both children over to play and for tea and said that we could have a chinwag over coffee whilst they were playing and get to know each other better.

So the response has come back that the mother is busy but the nanny would love to come over for a chat and coffee. I was quite shocked and thought this very cheeky since the invitation was clearly directed at the mother too.

AIBU to expect either the mother to come or else to suggest an alternative date if she is busy rather than send the nanny (who I've never even met) - or is this normal?

[timetomove]

Given the rudeness of the 2nd reply in particular, I think you should definitely say no to the lift home from dance. Presumably this is completely out of your way as I think you said you live 35 minutes from them. Either that or the dance class is even further than 35 mins, in which case i think it might be worth thinking about whether there is anything your kids can do more locally if they have to travel so far for both classes and school friends (and presumably even school itself)

[PatriciatheStripper]

Has it been established whether the lifts are reciprocated? Everyone is assuming that the OP does all the driving around, but if the lifts are shared between the two families then I don't see it is an issue.