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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have tipped p*ss on DP

255 replies

vixy0007 · 15/05/2011 22:45

My 34yo 'DP' came home blinding drunk friday night, fell asleep. All perfectly fine, until i woke up in the early hours to find him missing, so turning over to check where he was i realised i had rolled into a puddle of freezing cold wee. DP has a habit of doing this when he has had one to many, but this time he had woken up, noticed what he had done an got into the spare bed in the other room, leaving me in a piss covered bed!! Anyway, i woke up so annoyed i actually went downstairs, got a jug, did the biggest wee i could manage then went and tipped it on him ( not his face, his body ) just to see how he likes it. Needless to say he wasnt very pleased. was i out of order??

OP posts:
madwomanintheattic · 17/05/2011 04:05

i know a lot of blokes who claim to have done it (most have been known as 'swampy' by their mates), and it does seem to be some sort of horrific rite of passage for the military (where excessive drinking seems to be de rigeur).

most of them grow out of it by the time they get married though.

or out of basic training.

i can categorically say that if dh pissed the bed, it would be the last time he was in it having had so much as a sniff of a passing wine glass.

mingers.

Goodynuff · 17/05/2011 04:58

OP, what if he had shat the bed?

ClarenceChudbukitThe3rd · 17/05/2011 05:08

I am looking forward to seeing you on the Jezza Kyle show

GiveMeSomeSpace · 17/05/2011 06:17

Goodynuff - lad I went to school with shat the bed all over his other half. Other half had to wake him up and ask politley to clean everything up. Presume that meant clean her up as well!!

LostInTransmogrification · 17/05/2011 09:37

My still half-cut db woke up in the middle of the night and peed in the hall against my DMs door. She was not impressed. He thought it was hilarious.

Thankfully by DH has never done this but if he did it on a fairly regular basis and 1) showed no remorse 2) didn't decrease the amount he drank 3) didn't sleep in the other bed just in case, I would be so annoyed that I would consider doing what the op did. But I think I would chicken out and go for a bucket of icy water. And a lock on the bedroom door. I really do sympathise though because her dp seems to think that pissing on her is not a problem, which is totally disrespectful.

Goodynuff · 17/05/2011 14:50

GiveMeSomeSpace gag-choke---shudder
I don't know how I would react, but I don't think polite would come into it Grin

GoFullForce · 17/05/2011 14:58

My dh lashes the bed when drunk (excessively drunk) , as do his dad, his grandad, his uncle, his cousins, etc... he has something in his bladder, that doesn't send the message to the brain, overfills the bladder until the body is in a full sleep (relaxed). Apparently its quite common in men.

we actually use pampers bed sheets, if he gets very drunk (rare).

I think you're disgusting OP!.

madwomanintheattic · 17/05/2011 15:15

'its quite common in men'

who drink waaaaaaaay too much.

the rest of them, not so much.

common in that context.

HampstersDontSwim · 17/05/2011 15:38

GoFullForce

He sounds like a catch Hmm

Salmotrutta · 17/05/2011 16:44

I'm fairly sure this isn't normal - unless getting so drunk you are comatose is considered "normal".

And certainly not on a regular basis.

I'm also coming to the conclusion I have lived a very sheltered (or naive) life. And my DH and DS have never done this, certainly don't ever remember my dad or brothers doing it and no-one I have ever met has admitted to doing this.

Mind you - most men I know would be so mortified they wouldn't admit it and certainly would do encores. Hmm

Salmotrutta · 17/05/2011 16:45

wouldn't do encores!!!

PumpkinSnatch · 17/05/2011 20:39

GoFullForce please tell me that the bed sheet is put on a separate bed to the one you are sleeping in and you haven't just accepted that, occasionally, your husband wees on you!

MissBetsyTrotwood · 17/05/2011 21:49

I love that wee gets wallowed around in/chucked about liberally chez vixy but that you are really prim about just writing piss Grin .

You were unreasonable. Plenty of other ways to redress that balance, mainly involving his hangover the next morning. Why does he drink to that extreme anyway?

Pagwatch · 17/05/2011 21:52

It isn't common in men.
It is common in men who think that getting totally shit faced on a regular basis is reasonable. Or if they have bladder problems and a partner who lacks the self respect tp object.

TeeBee · 17/05/2011 21:59

I would have punched him, personally. But sellotape on the scrotum...now that's genius. I will keep that one if you don't mind.

cunexttuesonline · 17/05/2011 22:07

It has happened once with my DH, years ago. He was really drunk and woke me up sheepishly to tell me he had peed the bed, I got up, put on rubber gloves and dealt with the situation then straight back to sleep.

I have also had pee thrown on me by my ex when he was really angry at me one time. it's a very demeaning thing to do to somebody.

A1980 · 17/05/2011 22:23

What a classy couple you both are.

That's absolutely disgusting especially from you as it was deliberate.

FunnysInTheGarden · 17/05/2011 22:24

pagwatch I think you have ht the nail on the head ie 'common in men who think that getting shitfaced on a regular basis is normal'

Dh and I like a glass or two of wine of an eve, but to get so pissed you piss the bed..................totally abnormal.

And BTW why is it always men? Women get shitfaced too you know.

Lame and foul IMHO - incase you wanted my HO Grin

PumpkinSnatch · 17/05/2011 22:32

Why especially from the OP? She has been covered in her dp's piss on several occasions now. The first time maybe it was accidental but going out and getting that pissed again and doing it again is deliberate imo.

whomovedmychocolate · 17/05/2011 22:32

My name is WMMC and I have four toilets Wink

OP you clearly have never read the rule book on scat opera. He pisses in the bed, you take a dump in his glove compartment. That's the rule. Pissing in a jug and throwing it over him is rank amateur stuff and will get you kicked out of the golden showers club. Norty!

Grin
StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 17/05/2011 22:44

This is pretty disgusting, but I can also understand the OP's anger and desire to retaliate.

I really don't understand, though, why any man would repeatedly piss the bed when drunk. Once, I can understand, but if you know you are likely to piss the bed when drunk, don't get drunk!! And women who put up with it - I don't understand that either. Once might be an accident, but there is no way on God's clean earth that I would carry on living with someone who knew he was likely to wet the bed when drunk, but would still go out and get drunk anyhow. I certainly wouldn't be letting him use Pampers bedmats, a la GoFullForce!!

BarbieLovesKen · 17/05/2011 23:13

Myself and dh have had some whoppers of arguments over the years and have been really, really shit to each other at times (so generally I dont comment/ judge on these threads) but honestly if I had done this to dh, Im 99% sure he'd leave me and he'd be right. (I know I couldnt possibly stay with him after he deliberately poured his piss all over me - a definite deal breaker for me).

Also, I did actually pee on DH once Blush, accidently of course and Im completely mortified about it (still). But I was 9 days overdue with dd1, woke up in the middle of the night to pee, sat up, couldnt move quick enought (spd) and wee'd in the bed. I didnt know this happened in pregnancy at all and thought there was something wrong with me. I couldnt apologise enough and was terribly embarrased. Imagine if he'd pissed on top of me in retaliation Hmm. Obviously definately different from me being so pissed I cant control my bladder (and honestly, had this been the reason, I'd seriously be giving up the drink), which is foul but both were accidental.

I find this incredibly worrying actually and the OP obviously thought it was funny/ great etc.. as she wouldnt have ever mentioned it to another person had she not..

chipmonkey · 17/05/2011 23:15

Wanksock you cleaned it up?Shock whey didn't you make him clean it up?

PumpkinSnatch · 18/05/2011 00:52

Sorry Barbie but I think it stops being accidental when you know that you get into bed with your partner and piss yourself when you're drunk yet you persist in doing it and don't even apologise.

iscream · 18/05/2011 01:54

Correction/clarification in wording.
If my dh ever came home so drunk he urinated in the bed, he would be buying a new mattress, going to his doctor for help in quitting the booze and and I would be dumping every bit of alcohol in the house down the drain. That (any alcohol in your home) ( Hypothetically speaking only,) may have been better to dump on him that than booze urine, but it is abusive behavior either way. It is understandable you would be fed up. It would be very difficult to respect an adult who wets the bed drunk, not counting an actual medical problem.

Are you ok with a husband who drinks like this?
Do you have any plans to deal with his drinking?