Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want DNephew on Wedding Photos? Or am I being a bridezilla?!

268 replies

Bridezilla2011 · 14/05/2011 10:42

Firstly, I've namechanged as don't want to out myself incase any of the people involved are reading Wink

DP and I are getting married on Friday. DNephew (9) is page boy.

SIL rang this morning and left a voicemail on DP's phone to say that she thought she better warn us that today they are dying DNephew's hair bright green, as that is what he wants. She laughed at the end of the message saying 'sorry in advance about the wedding photos'.

I know she isn't joking. His hair has previously been all manner of colours - purple, pink, red etc.

So AIBU to ask DP to tell his sister that if his hair is bright green, I dont want him on my professional wedding photos? Or am I being a bridezilla?

If IABU, then please be gentle, I'm stressed enough already Grin

OP posts:
LadyThumb · 14/05/2011 11:30

Agree with: green hair - no photos. Stupid people! (And if it IS a wind-up, then she is a sicko!)

HRHShoesytwoesy · 14/05/2011 11:30

yanbu
wtf is someone doing dying a 9 yr olds hair

DoubleNegativePanda · 14/05/2011 11:30

Oh yes, totally different I agree! But even at that, so many people around me (non-family) absolutely could not believe I was "allowing the hobbit" business! But I was ok with it, and if the OP doesn't want a green pageboy then she shouldn't have one!

CurrySpice · 14/05/2011 11:31

Oh DNP your post made me really smile. How wonderful!! :o

Original poster
Bridezilla2011 · 14/05/2011 11:32

Grin @ wearing a baywatch costume to their next function!

What a fabulous idea!

OP posts:
Original poster
Bridezilla2011 · 14/05/2011 11:33

DNP that is brilliant! Really made me smile Smile

Loving the goblin outfit aswell, if only I'd seen that earlier....!

OP posts:
Maryz · 14/05/2011 11:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TidyDancer · 14/05/2011 11:35

DNP, that sounds wonderful. Grin

I am now actually rather envious of your wedding. Your sister was a star! (as were you for not making a fuss!)

OP, glad it's all looking better now. YWDNBU.

worraliberty · 14/05/2011 11:35

Is this child home educated then?

FudgeGirl · 14/05/2011 11:36

Your SIL sounds like a complete bitch, I think she's doing it to piss you off or grab attention at your wedding.

Sounds like you might be in for a bumpy ride - I'd tell her not to bother coming to the wedding actually, or her green-haired, spoilt little toad of a son either. It's such a clear example of her trying to ruin your day.

AlpinePony · 14/05/2011 11:38

Do not be surprised if come Friday he is resplendent in green after all. Get a disposable camera, tell him that it's your very special day and you want to be a beautiful princess etc etc (barf) and as I said before allow a couple of comedy pics. Give him the disposable and tell him you have a very special job for him - to take some very special photos of your wedding just for you, make sure the first pic on the film is you and him of course.

It's just chess and you need a back-up plan to out manoeuvre Lil.

kerstina · 14/05/2011 11:39

God if everyone let their children do exactly what they wanted it would be chaos! Does she let him do exactly what he wants all the time?

messybessie · 14/05/2011 11:40

Glad she's knuckled under. At least now, if he does show up with green hair regardless, he has been warned and everyone will just think she's a bit of a tit.

On a much much smaller scale, I have my 5 nieces as bridesmaids. 1 was 16 and the others were all 12 and under. One, in particular (11) was very mature looking for her age (tall, slim, adult face) but I was keen to make her look 11, partly because I didn't want her upstaging my lovely but awkward stage 12 year old bridesmaid (who was about a foot shorter).

I told my mother that 16 year old's hair was to be up and all the younger ones hair was to be down.

My sister, her mother, decided that it would be much better if her daughter was paired with the 16 year old as they 'looked the same' and told the hairdresser to put her hair up. She then told my mother that the hairdresser had said that she couldn't wear it down 'as it was too thick and would look a mess'.

Cue my mother screeching round to the hairdressers at breakneck speed.

People are funny.

QueentessentialExcel · 14/05/2011 11:40

Buy him a costume like that (or a clown suit with a red nose), and if he turns up on your wedding day, with ANY colour hair but his own, get him to wear the costume. Say to him "If you want to be a clown on my wedding day, go the full length, or step down as a page boy"

If anybody said something, just laugh it off and say "we thought it would be fun, given that he and his mum found it a fun joke to dye his hair green for the day"

Deep breath and smile. Smile

Original poster
Bridezilla2011 · 14/05/2011 11:41

Yes she probably is doing it so the attention will be on her. She is a bit like that tbh (and so is her son!).

Anyway, I must get DD to the hairdressers now before her rats tails spoil my photos anyway

OP posts:
Northernlurker · 14/05/2011 11:44

Yanbu - that's just rude. You do realise some people would sack him altogether?

SoloIsAHotCougar · 14/05/2011 11:44

worraliberty I think the namechange is to disguise the OP's usual nn Hmm so that anyone she knows in rl who might be reading doesn't know it...?!

I think YANBU at all. My own Ds last year pulled some stupid ganster type pose in a group wedding shot that otherwise was lovely. I was bloody furious for the bride and groom and so embarrassed...she wasn't too pleased either.

Photoshopping is an added expense which would be totally unneccesary if sil wasn't such a fool imo.

worraliberty · 14/05/2011 11:45

Is he home educated?

KeepCalmAndCurryOn · 14/05/2011 11:45

say you've changed the page boy costume and you want him to wear a prince charming outfit in pink. should scare him off.

ashamedandconfused · 14/05/2011 11:46

OMG is this for real? people routinely let their 9 yos have brightly dyed hair whenever they so choose? What about school?

I can just imagine the opposite thread - "SIL-to-be wants all the bridesmaids and page boys to have their hair dyed blonde to match her in the photos, ISBU"

GandTiceandaslice · 14/05/2011 11:51

YANBU.
It's not appropriate for a young child to have green hair at your wedding.

Icelollycraving · 14/05/2011 12:04

Call her yourself & say 'oh don't worry about the photos,we've instructed the photographer to exclude him so that won't be a problem.' Then laugh & say 'I don't want any proof for the poor boy when he grows up,he will die when his children see what he was allowed to get away with'.
Job done.
Bitch of sil.

HaughtyChuckle · 14/05/2011 12:08

TBH

Bridezilla def. I bet he'll look cute, and he will look stupid and you/his mum can use them to show his future g/f

this^^

I think wedding are a trp for getting too stressed may provide some laughs

cookcleanerchaufferetc · 14/05/2011 12:09

WTF! Green hair ... YANBU! It is your wedding! Exclude him from photos except for oe which his mum can buy is she wants one. I also think your SIL and B are taking the piss too.

WobblyWidgetOnTheScooper · 14/05/2011 12:10

DoubleNeg that is adorable and hilarious in equal measure! Bless :)

OP - wow. YANBU. I know people like your SIL who just want to hog the limelight, it is incredibly frustrating.