to think that I am doomed to a life of singledom forever?

[DameShirleyKnot]

I have been thinking recently about maybe getting a new boyfriend at some point in the future.

As the only men I ever meet are wankers, I don't know why I crossed that out actually, yes, most of the men I meet are wankers, I have decided to start having a little look on Guardian Soulmates to get an idea of what is out there.

Basically, what is out there is men like:

"Crazy Creator
Intuitive, playful, spontaneous, celebratory, he makes things - sometimes for 'the world of culture' but many times for you, songs, poems, cards, perfumes, he will get the tube carriage to sing happy birthday to you, hold a gigantic airport placard with your name on or when you are ill he will dress as a doctor...he will jump without thinking!!!!."

This. This man talks about himself in the 3rd person and is a dickhead.

Can anyone find me someone who is NOT a pretentious arse please?

I got Arnaud, from France, who is looking 'for a constructive communication, because sometimes I a little only smell myself'.

i just bought TJ, he not going to be happy when i tell him my names not Julie

I got Stan, (stationed) in Iraq

"I got way too much time on my hands over here. I'm on my second tour in Iraq and am supposed to go back in a few months. I'm cool with going to most anywhere afterwards. I'm looking for a traditional type of woman who wants a bunch of kids."

Oddly, it omits the fact that he has a stare that would phase Crippen.

Oh oh had to go out. Where's my pm of arse-face?

Sarah - good on yer gel!

Love face hair man. Bet he does astrology.

Sarah - only Stan? Ask him about trees and sausages.

Lol Hully, from VT's link. No messages from Guardian site yet. I am compiling a shopping list of men from there . Do they know if I 'like' them or do I have to send them a blatant message?

Pos don't swear, Reality. They start threads complaining about swearing and why we should bring back the death penalty.

Oh dear god. LOOK AT ANDREW'S TEETH.

we are going down the mail order husbands route after reality suggested we buy a man hully

I am looking for someone who can hold my attention, keep up with me, and who knows how to dress a wound. I am attracted to a girl with a job and a car. preferably a Camarro. I like to meet big american girl.

He's mine.

They are all so dreamy I can hardly choose between them. LOOK AT DARYL.

I have a GS who has 'liked' me. He looks like Locke and wants someone who is 'well bright and awake'

That site is just hilarious and frighteningly close to the cretins on PoF

theres a lovely success story on there, gives you hope dunnit?

oooooooooooo!!!!!

Sarah. Are you, like, well bright though?

LOOK AT MARCUS' HAT. AND ARMIN IS BRIGHT PINK.

Doubtful Shirl

After all I have demanded big feet and chipolatas. I feel like messaging him and demanding to know if he is up to my expectations.

Fuad is half-price and still way too expensive.

Well-bright is alarming.

What else does he say?

See I am so not 'well bright'. I can't even get my emphasis right.

no chipolatas ffs. no chipolatas.

i have to go, im coming back to this thread later with wine! dont let me buy Andrew after ive had a few (beer googles)

Haaaaahahahhaha. Haha. Ha.

"Someone who has a passport" WTF

hahah. What else is on his profile?

Vt, I really htink you and half-price Fuad could make a go of it.