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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that I am doomed to a life of singledom forever?

437 replies

DameShirleyKnot · 06/05/2011 10:42

I have been thinking recently about maybe getting a new boyfriend at some point in the future.

As the only men I ever meet are wankers, I don't know why I crossed that out actually, yes, most of the men I meet are wankers, I have decided to start having a little look on Guardian Soulmates to get an idea of what is out there.

Basically, what is out there is men like:

"Crazy Creator
Intuitive, playful, spontaneous, celebratory, he makes things - sometimes for 'the world of culture' but many times for you, songs, poems, cards, perfumes, he will get the tube carriage to sing happy birthday to you, hold a gigantic airport placard with your name on or when you are ill he will dress as a doctor...he will jump without thinking!!!!."

This. This man talks about himself in the 3rd person and is a dickhead.

Can anyone find me someone who is NOT a pretentious arse please?

OP posts:
SarahStratton · 06/05/2011 14:12

Fucking hell, he likes "sitting on a park bench in Prim Rose Hill or dare I say the Archers on a Sunday morning lay in..."

Nah.

Original poster
DameShirleyKnot · 06/05/2011 14:15

Tiny cock.

NEXT!

OP posts:
animula · 06/05/2011 14:15

Isn't that an implication of a stealth-boast?

"primsrose hill" = very, very solvent.

But not actually saying he lives there. so you can't get him for mis-selling when it turns out he lives on the bench.

SarahStratton · 06/05/2011 14:15

I have to go out :(

Maybe I will have messages when I get back Grin

Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:15

Give him a chance.

Ask him about "play that pricks interest and speaks truths that make the spirits sing"

SarahStratton · 06/05/2011 14:16

You worry me Hully Grin

Laters.

Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:16

"sitting on a park bench in Prim Rose Hill

That means: living on a park bench in Catford

Original poster
DameShirleyKnot · 06/05/2011 14:18

Laters!

I have found a profile on PoF of a young man who has a gawguss daughter. Which is really nice and that, but the best thing about him is that he has a photo of himself in a hospital bed with an oxygen mask on while unconcsious.

Why?

OP posts:
Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:19

Perhaps it's his best side?

Original poster
DameShirleyKnot · 06/05/2011 14:20

I have got to PM you it Hully. It is...AWESOME

OP posts:
heleninahandcart · 06/05/2011 14:21

noooo the links, the links!!!! just when I thought it was safe to go back... I clicked into GS.... its brought the whole horror back, will sue MN for PTSD Shock

Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:22

I want my other pm as well

Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:25

oh.dear.lord.

I'll fight you for him.

TethersEnd · 06/05/2011 14:28

Dear Shirl,

Please take this post as written confirmation that I would like to receive a PM of any gem you find, even if I'm not posting my usual witty and insightful anecdotes on the thread.

Cheers,

Tethers x

Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:29

The combination of the tatts and the mask is irresistible.

Original poster
DameShirleyKnot · 06/05/2011 14:29

Why are there so many young men on there? I don't get it...can't they just shag one of their mate's sisters or something?

OP posts:
TethersEnd · 06/05/2011 14:31

They already are.

They are just greedy.

Original poster
DameShirleyKnot · 06/05/2011 14:34

"If i dont reply to your message, please dont start sending more messages asking why i didnt reply because the chances are i wont reply to that one either so just leave it!! No there wasnt a problem with the server, your message did get delieverd... i just didnt want to reply! And Stop asking why i am on this site its pretty obvious, yes I am single ... the questions getting old now and i cant be botherd to answer it anymore!! If your sad enough to constantly be looking at the "whos viewed you" list and i pop up on there, dont start messaging me asking why i didnt message you because you could answer that question for yourself!!"

This angry little missive comes to us from Brad aka Ryder.

yep, he calls himself RYDER. WITH A "Y" yeah?

OP posts:
Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:34

Yes. sad but true. And they know they are irresistible. See, we're laughing at them, but I bet they are all laughing and seeing how many birds they can get even when they are masked-up.

heleninahandcart · 06/05/2011 14:35

DameShirley its because they are also open to older women, trust me I know this! Ironically men my age are not interested, they seem to want up to 35!

Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:36

Shirl! It's your chance, girl. Just blind yourself first and it'll be great.

Original poster
DameShirleyKnot · 06/05/2011 14:40

open to older women eh?

FUCK YOU CarmemaBurina . Fuck you.

"I dont need to be part of a group to feel I belong, I like being a lone wolf. I'm not racist, sexist or homophobic. I enjoy eating and doing sports of all kinds, my passion lies in kettlebells ,skipping and mixed martial arts ATM

First Date: Crazy golf and lunch in the country."

Ding DONG!

OP posts:
TiggyD · 06/05/2011 14:41

"I have been thinking recently about maybe getting a new boyfriend at some point in the future." - And why would they want you?

Rannaldini · 06/05/2011 14:43

have you considered prison inmates?

they are very receptive and those serving time for more unsavoury crimes don't mind the older lady

Hullygully · 06/05/2011 14:44

Tiggy - that is terribly harsh.

Anyone would be lucky to have Shirl. Fact.