AIBU to be disgusted with people who shove their life long dogs out because baby on way

[ohnoudidnt]

My friend who has had their dog for about 8 years,who once was her world has now shoved him to one side, even though he is well behaved,good around the baby etc ...I feel like he has been disgarded.I am in the same situation and my dogs are still part of my family and always will be.

DD would never have forgiven us if we had got rid of my elderly (gasp!) Staffy when she came along.

She and I are both at home today, and fighting over possession of The Puppy.

I too had people think that I will 'obviously' get rid of my cat because I was having a dc. Including one friend saying horrified 'but he could be scratched!' Well yes he could be. In fact odds on he will be. But he'll learn how to behave around an animal and treat them with respect. I plan to get a puppy when he is a little bit older. The horror.

On the nice side, I put ds in the middle of our bed while I got changed. Cat came and flomped onto him (as she does on us when she wants to be cuddled/sleep next to us). He grabbed her tail then the soft fur on her tummy. After a while, she got fed up and just got up and wandered away to flomp down the other end of the bed. I was really chuffed as ds is only four months and cat was previously a bit skittish around him.

Yeah, but it's as weird the other way.

When my parents split up and my dad remarried, his wife had several dogs and cats in the house who used to sit up and eat at the dinner table (e.g. try to take food off your fork as you were putting into into their mouth). The place had dander/hair/fluff everywhere.

Both dsis and I are asthmatic and it quickly got to the stage that we couldn't stay in their house because one or the other of us would end up in hospital.

I think it was more reasonable of my father, as a young dad, to rehome a snappy Jack Russell than to be in a situation where he had human children that couldn't visit him because of the animals in his home.

I am quite humancentric though..

I wouldn't have a dog in the house with a baby.But tehn I wouldn't have a dog fullstop.

Balia - "dogs have to be walked, for a start - how would a single parent manage that after a caesarian, for example?"

I wasn't a lone parent until my section-delivered DD2 was 7 weeks old but my husband did absolutely sod all cleaning, childcare, dogwalking or anything else so I may as well have been. It was simple - for the first weeks the dogs had to use the garden. Thereafter I walked both of them (a Lab sized Staffie cross and a Collie cross), together with my newborn and my 19 month old toddler. The effects of a section don't last forever you know.

nailak the couple you mention - I'd far rather them than some of the cunts I see coming to rescue with their dogs - or whom the vets pass on to us when they have gone into surgeries demanding that their dogs are killed because they can't be arsed to even try to find accommodation which will accept dogs.

I live in a privately rented house. Had my landlord not accepted dogs I wouldn't have moved here. I don't have Rottweilers, admittedly... I have 2 German Shepherds and a Labrador.

Had I not been able to find accomodation which accepted my dogs we would by now be living in a caravan on rescue premises with a chemical loo and a water supply out of a plastic container which is replenished via a hose in the yard. I would rather that than lose my dogs.

Sorry... I meant to say that for the first week (singular) after my caesarean my dogs used the garden and after that I walked them with my DDs in tow.

Valhalla: Reading all this has made me feel so sad about those poor animals. I have three cats and three DC ( quite balanced, I suppose ). They are all part of my family and I couldn't imagine life without the cats.

It has made me wonder whether it would be possible to introduce a rescued cat to our team. The last two were kittens so easy to introduce. How easy is it to introduce an adult cat and could it lead to our happy lot becoming stressed?

I wish I lived in a large farmhouse and could adopt lots of them!

I don't know - I refused to have a dog while my DCs were little. And I have a small dog that I know we could all control if he turned mental for some weird reason - you do read stories about a much loved 12 year old dog suddenly eating the face off a 10 year old who has grown up with the dog because they are eating crisps.

I took my dog to the park recently with my 11 year old DS. DS wanted to go off and play in the non-dog part of the park with his mates so I stayed in the dog bit with the dog. 2 very little kids, about aged 3 fell in love with the dog and were patting him and squealing and generally being unpredictable. They were nice kids but they were very young and I felt v nervous as I could see the dog was trying but was also getting a bit nervy. Their parents weren't doing a thing so I stayed right beside the dog saying to the kids (kindly), "soft and gentle now, that's nice, just a little pat, don't scare him".

But I really was on tenterhooks. I wouldn't get rid of a dog, but I also made sure I did not have one until my kids were old enough not to pull tails etc.

That said, if the dog really, genuinely bit any of us - not just a fearful or nervy snap, I don't think I would want him in the house any more.

Just like if DS1 punched me in the face I would kick him out (he's 20).

What kind of lazy arse can't cope with a cat? Pathetic. The truth is pets are resented because they are the easiest to pick on and disregard. I bet the grown men in peoples lives are still being catered to regularly.

I remember when I was young the neighbours had a baby and the lady next door took in their cat, they were worried that little Katelyn would pull the cats tail or something and the cat would react badly. I think thats quite sensible really, I mean she was only a baby, it's not like she knows this stuff yet? Then again in college a man was in my class who had had his little niece killed by a pitbull that the family owned. That's pretty wrong in my opinion. Some breeds of dog are just not family pets.

"Some breeds of dog are just not family pets."

Bollocks.

Some DOGS aren't suited to being family pets just as some people aren't suited to being parents/nurses/teachers/zookeepers.

Breed has got sweet FA to do with it.

MIL has always had a collection of dogs. Recently one dog died and so his companion was given away after she acquired three new puppies. The new dogs are the babies. They sleep in the spare bedroom (it is their bedroom - 2 bed house). In addition they resent anyone sitting next to MIL with the exception of FIL and possibly BIL/SILs.

I have asthma and always wondered why my asthma was so much worse at MIL's house when she lives in the country and it should normally be better there. It came out that the dogs get removed from their bedroom when we go to visit and so that it explains why they spend the night growling at us from behind the door and why they dislike us being there (barking and growling almost to the point of attack).

So in this instance, I feel that the dog owners are behaving badly. They have elevated the dogs position in the house. They have stopped being pets and become surrogate children. Meanwhile MIL also suggested I don't go up to visit as it stresses the dogs

I don't think that people should get rid of pets when they have children but I do feel that people should limit their pets to be being pets rather than surrogate children, perhaps in the long term that would help

BeerTricksPotter my objection isn't with them having dogs, my objection is with the dogs sleeping in the spare bed. I think if the dogs slept in dog baskets they (the dogs) would be a lot less hostile to visitors and would be less stressed when guests came to visit.

If the dogs weren't so hostile then we would most certainly visit more often because we want to spend time with the PIL.

OP I hate this too

here's a sweet one, though- a lovely couple near us had a big soppy dog and no kids. He was walked morning (by his 'dad' ) afternoon by 'mum' and late by both or either

then they had a lovely baby. And still, in all weathers, I'd see the mum, the baby in his papoose/buggy, and the dog. Now she lets the littlun hold the lead, so he thinks he's doing the Important Bit- while she secretly holds on behind

That's as it should be. Dogs are such affectionate and needy buggers that to be pushed out must be heartbreaking for them

Breed has got nothing to do with it?

So any animal can be a cuddly pet?

Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh my!

Are you being deliberately obtuse, onagar?

I think onegar might have seen a Leonberger or Newfoundland and got confused with lions and bears

LOL @ Ephiny!

onagar Mostly animals react badly when they are scared or being territorial. And both of those things are well within the realms of a responsible dog owner and the parent to manage.

Unfortunately there seems to have been a rash of people buying dogs which they don't have the first clue about looking after, despite feeding/exercising them. Japanese Akitas are working dogs for example - if you don't give their brains something to work on, they'll find something to do (usually chewing, manipulating people or otherwise misbehaving).

And combine that with people/kids who've never had dogs and overreact about every single little thing and you have a disaster. It's a vicious circle.

We have had dogs all my life, and we have had precisely one dog who bit. And you know what? It was entirely unacceptable behaviour and we got the dog shrink in to sort it out. The cat-out-of-hell I can't do much about, but the kids know fine well to leave her alone and if they get scratched/bitten it's always because they've been bugging her and I have very little sympathy. Husband is still to learn tho - her kitty-come-hither-and-play-face is somewhat misleading...