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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that not everything has to be caused by a "Disorder"

173 replies

Bogeyface · 05/04/2011 21:55

About all the posts on here with people saying "perhaps s/he has XX personality disorder"

Why can some people just be a fucking nightmare because....they are? Its really annoying that on most threads about an annoying, needy, selfish etc person, the OP is told that the person might have some form of personality disorder when most of the time they wont have!

If it must be done can some psychologist please discover the following

Demanding Bitch Disorder
PITA Disorder
Useless Wanker Disorder
Lazy Bastard Disorder
Selfish Arsehole Disorder
Simply Not A Nice Person Disorder
I Like To Label People With A Disorder Disorder

OP posts:
catnao · 05/04/2011 23:20

Moon dog - my son achieved the highest academic levels in his year. And, with no tutoring, achieved a scholarship to Warwick School. Still a nightmare - what do you suggest? (Not sending him private - they can't, in my view, cater for him.)

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:23

ADHD is fictional? Ha! No.It's not.

Triggles · 05/04/2011 23:26

"A family member has a personality disorder so believe me I know the real thing when I see it!"

Well... there you go then. No point in any medical professionals getting involved then. You are OBVIOUSLY an expert. Hmm

catnao Yes, indeedy. Amazing, isn't it? My DS2's ADHD (among other "disorders" shock gasp) means we're middle class? Hmmm... this bears thinking about.. I had no idea. Grin I must speak to DH about our style of living.

yawn. Sooooo done to death.

I don't think everyone has a disorder. But since obviously some do, it would seem that the most intelligent thing to do is ... um... mind your own business and quit being so blasted judgemental perhaps? Or are you unable to do that because of some type of disorder.... Hmm

steps101 · 05/04/2011 23:26

Bogey - "to suggest that someone has a PD based on one post on here is ridiculous."

Ah, ok - apologies. I agree with this. I have bipolar disorder, and it really fucking riles me when some idiot who's spent too much time on netdoctor "diagnoses" someone with bipolar dosorder based on someone else's account of their behaviour on a forum.
I do think, though, that some of the behaviour described on here is pretty bad, and that sometimes a recommendation to consult a professional is warranted.

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:27

I would like to refer readers to Doctor Jo Jones.

Original poster
Bogeyface · 05/04/2011 23:28

Can I add "not reading the OP disorder" to my list?!

I have not and would never say that such things dont exist.

I am merely pointing out my annoyance at people posting on threads on here that people they dont know and have very little information about might have a PD.

"Sick of my mother, she never wants to visit us but it always moaning that she doesnt see enough of us. She wants it all her own way....etc..etc"

"Perhaps she has Narcissistic Personality Disorder"

Yeah, or perhaps she a selfish and self centered old bag! What's wrong with offering a bit of tea and sympathy instead of diagnoses by Google?

OP posts:
steps101 · 05/04/2011 23:29

Fabby - "I know about mental health issues moreso than anybody because I have been there, and having been there, been diagnosed and worn the T shirt for 30 years I do feel qualified in talking about it."

You don't feel qualified in talking about ALL mental health issues though, do you? I have bipolar disorder (diagnosed nearly 6 years ago) and even that, to be honest, I would (I hope) never try to diagnose remotely; and I hope I'd never make absolute statements about it.

Original poster
Bogeyface · 05/04/2011 23:30

Triggles as I pointed out after that, I didnt say what I meant there, I meant that it takes more than a stranger thinking that one or two criteria in a post on here matching a list on Google is sufficient to diagnose a PD.

OP posts:
Maryz · 05/04/2011 23:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:33

Just saying, like.

try real research maybe?

Anyway - must put my bad parenting to bed (Shit - my son seems to be sleeping - and I am sober and living with his dad! Could it be a real condition???)

Triggles · 05/04/2011 23:33

Last time I checked, "perhaps" was not equal to a diagnosis. People are simply offering up things for thought. It's quite a big leap from "perhaps" to "diagnosis by Google". It's most likely because they don't have much information on the person that they toss in any possible ideas. It's then up to the OP to filter out what information is helpful and what they might consider following up on. You can "think" what you like, but there's nothing wrong with people offering up possibilities and information. If it bothers you that much, don't read it.

Maryz · 05/04/2011 23:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:35

I do not give my son dangerous drugs on the basis of "perhaps".

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:37

Try real research and proper diagnosis. Again, I refer you to Jo Jones, who does have a good web page to look at.

Original poster
Bogeyface · 05/04/2011 23:40

Catnaom I am sure you dont! That is EXACTLY my point!

Please read what I have written.

OP posts:
FlaminGreatGallah · 05/04/2011 23:42

Would the right teaching enable a person with a severe sight disorder to see? In the way that a fully-sighted person can see?

I would like to think that the right teaching could make my son neurologically typical instead of autistic but his brain is wired differently and although he can be taught things albeit in a different way and with so much more effort involved, it's a bit simplistic to say it's just a question of teaching.

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:42

Sorry, Bogey face - very defensive, I expect!

For a reason. Daily Fail doing us no favours, and people believe things you wouldn't credit!

worraliberty · 05/04/2011 23:44

YANBU

If a particular disorder is diagnosed by an expert then fair enough. But 'self diagnosis' and those who refuse to believe some people are just a certain way because that's what they're like...do piss me off.

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:45

Thanks that my son's diagnosis is "fair enough"

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:47

I am going to a meeting with his secondary school tomorrow - they want to down grade his help to NOTHING - as he has no academic issues. He has STATEMENT of special needs! But it's for ADHD so that's OK then. Right/

catnao · 05/04/2011 23:47

Looking forward to sec ed...

FlaminGreatGallah · 05/04/2011 23:50

Fair enough. Not devastating then Hmm

Oh don't worry catnao, we only do it to get the DLA don't we? We don't actually fight and research and read and make phone calls to and write endless letters, attend appeals and tribunals to get proper provision for our children.

What we do is get a diagnosis, collect the money, pass Go and blame everything on the condition. After all, if we actually cared enough to try to improve our children's prospects the money might stop rolling in.

worraliberty · 05/04/2011 23:51

I'm sorry to hear that catnao

FlaminGreatGallah · 05/04/2011 23:53

catnao, sorry to hear that the LEGALLY ENFORCEABLE DOCUMENT relating to the help your DS is entitled to is being ignored in this way. On what grounds? A substantial body of reports from independent professionals?

pigletmania · 05/04/2011 23:54

Well as in a thread that was moved somewhere else of a DV situation, that man clearly had some sort of personality disorder, and had narcissistic/sadist tendencies. He enjoyed making the op miserable and insulting her, he was indifferent in how his behaviour was making her feel, he lacked any feeling and empathy, he actually spent time devising insults that would really hurt her to the core for his own pleasure and amusement Sad. If you look up the symptoms its clearly one with a personality disorder.