to think my dd has no right to take it upon herself to do this

[NotSuchASmugMarriedNow]

My dd (12) has been really moody and stroppy all day - something she does when she's over tired, so I ignored the strops and put it down to tiredness.

Then tonight she told me she had taken an anti-histamine this morning because when she went out to play her eyes were itching

Now, as she's my youngest and she's 12 I really don't feel the need to keep the medication locked up BUT I would never have dreamed that she would help herself to tablets without even asking. I am horrified.

When I told her in no uncertain terms that she was not allowed to take ANYTHING without checking with me first she said that she had asked me but I wasn't listening.

I think she's lying. I am sure that she didn't ask but even if she did ask and I wasn't listening that doesn't give her the right to go ahead and take one anyway does it?

YABU. She is old enough to self medicate a drug she has previously taken for a longstanding condition.

Like I said earlier - get a locked medicine cabinet if you're going to through a hissy fit every time your children take the initiative to sort themselves out.

You are not even sure that she didnt ask.

asthma and diabetes are different, they are life threatening conditions, hayfever is not.

Exactly. So it won't do her any harm to help herself to one antihistamine for a very minor ailment will it then if asthmatics can be trusted with adrenaline in a can (ventolin) to administer themselves

We're in agreement then!

em, I thought you did have to be 16. The chemist in Morrisons wouldn't sell my 14 year old son a nasal decongestant spray last week.

You sound awful, you really do.

Like you are really cross about it.

I bet there's a real atmosphere in your house tonight, simply because she took something to alleviate her symptoms.

YABU

maybe she did ask, and like most parents who are occupied maybe you didn't hear her.

but if i needed tablets when i was 12 for period pains they where there, no permission needed....my mum kept all medication locked up due to younger siblings but she told me where the key was

Im not sure why the seriousness of the condition is relevent. Hay fever isnt nice and your DD used the medication appropriately.

yes - many companies have set their own policies - but it's not an actual law

asthma and diabetes are different, they are life threatening conditions, hayfever is not
That maybe so but try telling that to someone who's child looks like she's been in a boxing ring if she doesn't get the medication quick enough.

I think it would depend on the 12yo, to be honest. Some are responsible enough to pay attention to the precautions (medication interactions, time between doses, aware of possible reactions) and some are not. I think if you are concerned about it, then the most intelligent move would be to sit down with her and make sure she is aware of those things listed and as long as she is responsible, then it should be fine.

Ok it looks like i'm in the minority here.

It's OK for 12 year olds to self medicate then?

My children are not renowned for backing each other up. I'll hold my hand up and admit then when I'm occupied with something I often don't remember giving a negative or positive answer to questions - but if I have then whichever DS was present when the question was asked will tell me I did (and if I didn't they'll tell me I didn't).

Providing they are sensible enough, and you as a mother are the judge of that, then yes, they are.

yes it is.

ahh but in your op you said that she said that she did ask but you wasnt listening,

maybe you should listen to your child, she hasnt commited a crime, she took it upon herself to take a relativly harmless tablet that wasnt locked up to relieve the symptoms of hayfever.

Good on her, imo she acted very grown up and you are behaving like a child, get over it, she did right and you dont like that she went against you for her own well being because you didnt listen when she asked you.

I'd hazard a good guess that the OP's DD has to have AH's reasonably regularly for hayfever, I bet she has to take it more often than my DS1 has to take his Ventolin (which is on prescriptioin)............as DS1 only needs that when he gets a cold which mutates into nasty chest infection (which happens most times he gets a cold - hence it being on prescription).

i hate having hayfever, atm i have no tablets and my eyes are itchy my nose is so sore from snezzing all the time and i feel crap.

"It's OK for 12 year olds to self medicate then?"

Yep that's what everyone in this thread has said.
Not that in this specific case and set of circumstances that you were unreasonable, no they expressed a wide ranging and general statement of "12 year olds can self-medicate to their hearts content."

Given that you're not listening to people on here, even when you've specifically asked for opinions., can you say hand on heart that you listened to your daughter well enough today to be able to say she definitely didn't ask you?

When I was 12 it wouldn't even have occurred to me to ask before buying myself over-the-counter anti-histamines! I think you should take your cue from the fact that she could walk into a supermarket and buy them for herself.

i agree with op.

gave up reading in the middle of the thread though

anyhow, unles she takes them regularly i would ahve expected her to check with mum, tell/ask.

my dd would at nearly 14 and ds at 16.

Good on you OP, that's the spirit.

To be fair I think it wouldn't hurt for your DD to mention she'd had one around the time she had one - if nothing else you can manage your "stock" levels. Same as if she has a yogurt...maybe not tell you each time but she could mention it if its getting low, etc.

Sorry I sounded harsh in my last post, I know things aren't great for you at the moment (didn't realise who you were at first) x

Are you this controlling and self-righteous over every other aspect of your DC'slives? If so, you havea lot of fun ahead of you once they decide they are old enough to drink/have sex/wear interesting clothing.