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AIBU?

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Original poster

RESCUE HELPERS UNITE

225 replies

staffylover · 14/03/2011 17:36

to being miffed at being threatened and having my account closed?

My son fostered a dog through the above, they are a collection of volunteers who help rehome, mainly dogs, but cats and small furries as well. Without informing RHU he rehomed the dog, which is a big no-no...I bollocked him and the rescue got the dog back. People connected to the rescue, NOT RHU, threatened to castrate my son and send animal rights "friends" to see him. My son is an animal lover and at no time abused, harmed or in any way neglected this lovely dog and in the few days he had the dog he bought the dog a new crate new toys and turned her around from being a manic dog to one that was good with other dogs, walked good on the lead/off the lead and knew her basic commands. I loved doing things for the animals for no return. When this rescue got the dog back they told the woman that she had bitten a child, untrue, but on its website it says it is good with children? Any advice?

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 14/03/2011 19:26
AgentZigzag · 14/03/2011 19:28
JaxTellersOldLady · 14/03/2011 19:38

staffylover

I am a little bewildered after reading. Let me get this straight in my head, it's been a bloody long day.

1 - Your son, in mid 20's fostered a dog on behalf of RHU

2 - Your son then rehomed the dog to a new family, unknown to RHU, unknown to your son and without fee or home check.

3 - When RHU found out what happened they went ape shit, probably because the dog was rehomed on behalf of RHU and they would be liable for any legal responsibility should the dog harm anyone.

4 - you and your son have now been banned from the RHU forum/website and have been stopped from fostering dogs for now or in the future?

Am I correct so far?

JaxTellersOldLady · 14/03/2011 19:41

Assuming I have the facts correct so far, I would say that while you can train a dog in a relatively short period of time, there is no way your son could really know this dog after a few days. There are so many variables that it just isnt possible, sorry.

The thread of violence is terrible, absolutely no need for that at all. Did your son rehome this dog to someone unsuitable? A known dog fighter or similar?

Why would someone threaten such violence?

Vallhala · 14/03/2011 20:10

I don't know about threatening violence but I'd have hit the fecking roof had this happened to a dog I was responsible for... and I'd certainly want to hit your son.

His behaviour was disgraceful and could have had serious repercussions for the dog, the adoptive family, the wider public and the rescue. No wonder they're fuming, it's not just the dog and the public, it's their good name your son has put on the line.

I can see why you're upset, to be found "guilty by association" but if I feared for one moment that a son would use his parents' forum membership or influence his parents in any way following his shocking behaviour I'd withdraw RHU account privildges too. It's just not a chance I'd be willing to take.

If you're concerned though why not pm RHU's mods and discuss it with them? I know they can be a bit... erm.... odd.... but they aren't unapproachable.

Vallhala · 14/03/2011 20:49

BTW, what rescue is it that has issued the threats? Do you have a link to the info on the forum?

Original poster
staffylover · 14/03/2011 21:01

As i stated in my OP it was the rescues representative who have made these threats. I was outraged when he told me what he had done. You say they are protecting their good name so why are they allowing the rescue to still use the forum. They told lies about the dog to take it off the lady....why not just say you are not suitable and give the reasons? Threatening violence in any way is abhorrent. He made a horrible mistake. In what way am I badmouthing RHU Im simply stating I have had my account closed through no fault of my own. The dog was a different dog withing three days..........all the dog wanted was attention and it responded.

OP posts:
Original poster
staffylover · 14/03/2011 21:08

jaxtellersoldlady you have the facts but keep it sensible...a known dog fighter??????????? I do not know why they should threaten violence.

OP posts:
Original poster
staffylover · 14/03/2011 21:12

PS the rescue did say they were happy if my son did the homecheck......

OP posts:
JaxTellersOldLady · 14/03/2011 21:22

staffylover, I am trying to keep it sensible, by trying to make sense of what you have posted.

I hope you get things sorted out with RHU - and your son has learned a lesson.

JaxTellersOldLady · 14/03/2011 21:23

oh and the reason why I mentioned that is because I cant understand someone threatening that level of violence for no reason. I did ask a question, thats all.

DooinMeCleanin · 14/03/2011 21:27

You cannot train a dog in three days.

JaxTellersOldLady · 14/03/2011 21:29

staffylover doing a homecheck and rehoming a dog 'illegally' are 2 completely different things.

And like dooin and others have stated you cannot train a dog in 3 days.

Vallhala · 14/03/2011 21:31

They told lies about the dog to take it off the lady....why not just say you are not suitable and give the reasons?

TBH it's going to be far, far quicker and easier to get the dog back by saying that he's child-aggressive than it is to say that someone entrusted to foster the dog had acted like a complete prick and just hope that the people he gave the dog to are going to hand her back without argument. Given that the dog went out to an unchecked home and that there was no rescue contract as a result the family could have insisted on keeping her and thus a very protracted and costly law suit or a break in would have had to ensued in order to get her back.

This is only my assessment of the situation from what you've said but I'd put a damn good bet on it being accurate. You do whatever it takes to safeguard the dog. I'd have told the family that the dog was child-aggressive too if that's what it took to get them to hand the dog back immediately and without any fuss.

ballstoit · 14/03/2011 21:31

Op, YABU.. You and your son should perhaps be looking for the rest of the sandwiches for your picnic instead of emailing the administrators of a website who have every right to close your account.

Vallhala · 14/03/2011 21:32

Sorry, the first sentence - "They told lies about the dog to take it off the lady....why not just say you are not suitable and give the reasons?" is quoting the OP although I forgot to add the inverted commas.

Original poster
staffylover · 14/03/2011 21:57

Vallhala My son has done wrong. I have told him that. I don`t appreciate the language you are using in connection with him and you are from accurate. Like you the animals welfare is paramount. As I have stated elsewhere the rescue were more than happy for him to do the homecheck. But at the end of the day we were not responsible for his actions. He no longer lives in my home.

Afer the rehoming my son co-operated in every way with this rescue.

OP posts:
LuckySalem · 14/03/2011 22:02

Your son is wrong for doing what he did but they are wrong for removing YOU if you were not part of it.

HOWEVER, if you knew that he'd done it and didnt tell them he'd done it then you are as bad as him.

Original poster
staffylover · 14/03/2011 22:02

ballstoit this is an adult forum lets keep the snide remarks in the play ground. We all make mistakes and thankfully the dog was unharmed.

Vallhala it should say "you are far from accurate"

OP posts:
Vallhala · 14/03/2011 22:06

Of course you're not responsible for your adult son's actions, I didn't indicate that you are, or if I did I certainly didn't mean to.

I'm not privy to RHU's admin and mods so I can't speak for them - who knows what their motivation is. All I can think of is that either:

A. They are not satisfied that your son won't influence you/access your RHU membershipm in some way or

B. They weren't happy with the manner in which you spoke to them about the issue.

I stand by what I said though, whether you like my language about your adult son or not - he acted like a complete prick and could have cost the dog or a human their life. FWIW I have daughters who do live at home and who are my responsiblity and I'd tell them that they were far worse than "complete pricks" if they'd pulled the stunt your son did, though to be fair to them my 14 and 15 year old daughters know and respect how rescue works and the importance of homechecking and wouldn't dream of doing as your adult son has.

Original poster
staffylover · 14/03/2011 22:10

JaxTellersLady I answered your question...I do not know why they threatened violence. What I posted is pretty straighforward. Yes he has learned a lesson.

OP posts:
LuckySalem · 14/03/2011 22:13

Oh and what the rescue did (if true) was pretty dangerous as by saying to someoen that they have bitten a child and then posting as good with children they can open themselves up to legal action (I think)

  • If you have a problem with what RHU did then go join another one. THere is at least 2 more that I can think of?
Vallhala · 14/03/2011 22:16

LuckySalem, you aren't wrong in this age of lawsuits but still I can see why the rescue acted as they did - desperate measures and all that.

staffylover which rescue was it whose members have threatened your son with violence?

LuckySalem · 14/03/2011 22:17

Oh no I totally understand it but I'm sure it's risky. The boy was VERY silly and I'm sure he now understands it.

Rockmaiden · 14/03/2011 22:18

I am also a member of RHU and want to point out staffylover that you were aware of what your son was doing and did nothing to stop it.

You may not agree that what he did was wrong but he was. A rescue does much more than home check a new family before approving them and your son went behind there backs and skipped the checks.

On top of that did your son get a donation from the new owners? After all the rescue had spent money on the dog they need to re-coup some.

After just 3 days in foster a dog's personality is not clear, they are still in honeymoon period stage and could have well been child-agressive etc.

Your son did not wait long enough to find these facts out and just passed the poor dog on to suffer through even more up-heavel and confusion.

Also how can you say the new family were not neglectfull or known dog-fighters? Your son as a home checker and fosterer will not have access to this information but rescue's keep lists of people un-suitable to have dogs for whatever reason, how do you know these people were not on that list?

I understand you will defend your son, really I do but he was completely wrong and a poor dog has suffered due to it. Thankfully the dog is now back where he belongs and not in some pound or being put to sleep like many staffie's end up.