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AIBU?

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Original poster

to be mightly pissed of with this?

83 replies

FanellaFidget · 04/03/2011 13:02

Am pregnant with DC4. We have three DS's. We have choosen not to find out the sex. We will be made up with either sex, and am not - contray to what everyone I meet seems to think - desperate for a girl. This will be our last baby.

Have just been to see IL's, when we were leaving I was handed a bag of brand new baby clothes. Told to get them out at home.

I'm home... it's full dresses, tights, and all things pink Hmm. IL's have made no secret of the fact they would like me to have a girl, (BIL has two boys, not having anymore) which is fine I can cope with that...but buying girls clothes before I've even popped?!

Might be pregnancy hormones, but this has really enraged me. Can't bring myself to call to say thanks. Am I being really ungrateful, or are they out of order?

OP posts:
BluddyMoFo · 04/03/2011 13:04

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BuzzLiteBeer · 04/03/2011 13:05

Of course they are, but its not worth a row. Just say thank you and shove it in a press in case you need it.

JaneS · 04/03/2011 13:05

It's a really peculiar thing to do - why not give them back and say you'd prefer they kept them (with the receipts) until you've had the baby, as you don't want to think about the sex?

Lawm01 · 04/03/2011 13:05

Wow, YANBU. Completely baffling - are they usually reasonable people? If they are, then hopefully, in time, you can put this down to a massive error in judgement.

Don't think I would be able to call and thank them

cheesesarnie · 04/03/2011 13:05

so wrong!
dont call them.if they call to ask why youve not thanked them,explain that its made you mad.ask what happens when you give birth and its another lovely gs for them?

notnowbernard · 04/03/2011 13:06

I think it's a bit wierd of your ILs to give you a load of gender-specific clothes when you don't know the gender! Confused

I wouldn't be pissed off at that , per se... but I did used to get pissed off with the constant assumptions that I wanted a DS after 2 DDs, when I really and truly didn't care either way

VinegarTits · 04/03/2011 13:06

that is a highly insensitive thing to do, i would ring them and ask 'what will you do if i have a boy?' Hmm cheeky twats

Bogeyface · 04/03/2011 13:06

I dont think that they are being out of order, and I wouldnt be enraged, thats a bit OTT imo!

But they are being incredibly stupid and must have money to burn. I would ring and thank them and then ask what are you supposed to do with them if you have another boy. Wishing for something wont make it happen, and if they really wanted to buy them then they should atleast have kept them until the baby was born. It isnt like you can change the babys sex to fit the clothes is it?!

I cant help wondering what their reaction would be to another boy, if they didnt go out and buy a similar amount for their new grandson then that would enrage me.

Iklboo · 04/03/2011 13:06

Buying you girls' clothes isn't going to make a difference to the sex of the baby you're already having. What a silly waste of money they've made if it turns out you're having a boy. What did your DH say?

GoldenGreen · 04/03/2011 13:07

I can only think that they must be convinced you have secretly found out and know it's a girl...otherwise it's a very odd thing to do

LionRock · 04/03/2011 13:07

I'd be tempted to return them to the in-laws (or get your other half to do it) and if they ask why, be honest. Depends of course on your relationship with them etc (though they don't seem to have considered your feelings).

Flisspaps · 04/03/2011 13:09

YANBU.

I'd ask - no, in fact, DH would ask - if they have the receipts (if they've not given them to you) so that you can return the clothes and get some neutral coloured items because you don't know what you're having and you don't want all that money to go to waste. Unless they've developed X-ray vision and have seen your unborn child's genitalia for themselves.

Flisspaps · 04/03/2011 13:10

Asking you to wait until you're home to look at them makes me wonder if they had an inkling that you might be angered by the fact it is all girls' stuff...

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 04/03/2011 13:11

I had 3 Ds's before DD was born. I got sick of the "ooh I bet you hope it's a girl this time" comments. When DD was born I got loads of "oh wonderful you FINALLY got a girl" comments. It made me so sad for the DS's as if somehow DS2 and DS3 were just inconvenient mistakes Angry FWIW I always wanted 4 DC's of whatever sex and if my motivation to keep having more DC's was my desire for a particular sex there was a 50% chance of disappointment each time. Ignore your IL's they are loons.

LaurieFairyCake · 04/03/2011 13:13

I think you should laugh secretly and then if you have a boy hand them back once born and ask them to exchange it.

Perhaps you are annoyed because they have a 50% chance of being right Wink and it will utterly enrage you if they are (it would me too)

Original poster
FanellaFidget · 04/03/2011 13:14

Thank goodness it's not me! Was worried I was being oversensitive.

I feel like they will only be excited if it's a girl. Feeling protective of my possible unborn DS, I think!

They can't be convinced it's a girl, I've said throughout I think it's a boy so as to shut them up going on about girls

OP posts:
FindingStuffToChuckOut · 04/03/2011 13:14

It's a very peculiar thing to do.

I can see why you might be pissed off, but do you think you could try and find a funny side to it too? I mean just how weird are they being?????? I'd be laughing at them and shaking my head too!

If you are blessed with another son, I'd be dressing him up in the clothes provided by in-laws for their visits. Imagine how funny it will be if you do have a boy and for as long as the clothes fit the baby you dress the boy in the inlaws gifts for every time they see him. Grin (and if you are blessed with a girl then you can just giggle to yourself about the above scenario that never was when you use the clothes)

kazmus · 04/03/2011 13:14

really Victoria, I didn't think you and David would want hand me downs anyway! lol

Original poster
FanellaFidget · 04/03/2011 13:15

Flisspaps - I think you're right about that, strange that they waited until we were going.

Laurie - that made me smile!

OP posts:
worraliberty · 04/03/2011 13:15

That's very weird Confused

bran · 04/03/2011 13:15

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bran · 04/03/2011 13:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
FanellaFidget · 04/03/2011 13:16

That took me a second kazmus! They're not hand me downs anyway Wink

OP posts:
AmazingBouncingFerret · 04/03/2011 13:16

Grin kazmus.

FindingStuffToChuckOut · 04/03/2011 13:17

yay bran

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