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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be fed up with MARKS & SPENCER security staff following me

96 replies

Iamnotashoplifter · 26/02/2011 19:05

I have decided to stop shopping at my local Marks & Spencer store due to the intimidating security staff following me everytime I am shopping there. I have no idea what I am doing to attract their attention but clearly they have singled me out as a potential shop lifter, I find their behaviour very intimidating. This is not an experience I have had at any other supermarket. I know some of you will say but if you are not stealing anything why let it bother you, these security men are blatant in the way they watch you to the point that other shoppers notice. Maybe its because I take my own carrier bags which is what M & S have encouraged us to do,whatever the reason for being followed everytime I've had enough and won't be giving M & S my business anymore, AIBU?

OP posts:
privategodfrey · 26/02/2011 19:07

Maybe they fancy you Blush

zikes · 26/02/2011 19:07

Does one of the bags you use have "SWAG" written on it?

FourFortyFour · 26/02/2011 19:07

You could always stop and ask them if there is a problem.

mmsmum · 26/02/2011 19:08

YANBU to be annoyed. Have you turned round and confronted them about it? If it ever happens to me (and it does when I go shopping after dog walking and look a bit rough) I will stare right back until the take the hint. It's never been so bad that I'd want to leave a shop and not go back and if it was as relentless as you say then I would speak to someone to complain. At the very least I would want to know why

Flisspaps · 26/02/2011 19:09

Zikes Grin

I was followed by a PCSO around the local retail park last week Hmm - was quite obvious when I had to double back on myself due to the enormous double buggy not being able to get round various aisles in stores, and he was stood about 3 feet behind me each time Grin

Original poster
Iamnotashoplifter · 26/02/2011 19:10

FourFortyFour, was going to do that but instead I complained the store manager. Not sure what the guy would have said to me though he's just doing his job but not very discreetly.

OP posts:
ObiWan · 26/02/2011 19:14

I was in the £1 Blushshop (perusing the arts and crafts stuff for the children you understand!) when my husband pointed out the security bod on my tail Grin.
I was overcome by the irrational need to yell 'we're on maternity/paternity leave - we can afford to shop here!' I resisted the urge...

thefirstMrsDeVere · 26/02/2011 19:18

I used to get followed all the time! It used to drive my mum mad! Its comes and goes depending on my hairstyle (dreadlocks deffo got followed) and whether I am pregnant or not. They seem to think that all pregnant women are rabid kleptomaniacs!

ijudge · 26/02/2011 19:19

I'm followed everytime I enter Lidl - I mean Lidl fgs.

I lead him a merry dance round that shop I can tell you!

MogadoredMemoo · 26/02/2011 19:20

My friends dh has this where ever he goes. He is 6ft4, 22 stone and bald. Apparently that makes him a shoplifter.

TheCrackFox · 26/02/2011 19:21

I always used to get followed when I was pushing a buggy. I wouldn't mind so much but it was always in cheapie shops like Peacocks or Poundstretchers. If I wanted a criminal record for shoplifting then I would choose the Mulberry shop at the very least.

doley · 26/02/2011 19:23

My husband used to get this in our local Tesco .

Security would follow him everywhere ~till that is ,he decided to ask them what wine they would recommend with tonights super Wink

It is a big pain ,I agree .

veritythebrave · 26/02/2011 19:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GORGEOUSX · 26/02/2011 19:29

OP Are you sure you're not just miffed 'cos it's preventing you from shoplifting? Grin

BreakOutTheKaraoke · 26/02/2011 19:31

Do you have a pram with you? I always used to get followed when I had a pram. I do sympathise with you, but OTOH I work in a shop, and know how much you can get bollocked when security tags, etc, have been found on an area that you are supposed to be covering!

mmsmum · 26/02/2011 19:38

It's interesting that so many people have said they get followed when they have a pram. I had a friend, years and years ago, who would put make-up and other small but expensive items in the folds of the hood of her pram to steal. She said if she ever got caught, which she never did, that she would say they must have fallen in there. I now wonder if she wasn't the only one

Lucyinthepie · 26/02/2011 19:42

When I worked in an electrical shop, in the days when video players were really, really big, some people detached one from the security system and walked out with it in a pram. Nobody realised until they were long gone. Dodgy these people with prams. Grin

whattheheckisthisflaminplace · 26/02/2011 19:44

My OH gets followed everywhere...funnily enough, he's a security guard (hmm)

Bilin · 26/02/2011 19:45

YANBU. It happens to me a lot. I think generally security guards feel that shoppers with kid (s) and a pushchair are likely to shoplift.

Sequins · 26/02/2011 19:48

I had this in Boots, I emailed a complaint - then avoided that particular shop for some time!! It was quite a long complaint, I described my appearance and spending patterns and suggested that there was no reason to follow me unless I had a doppleganger who was a regular shoplifter.

Thinking back, I might have been pregnant at the time. But pregnant woman should not mean klepto, surely?

Original poster
Iamnotashoplifter · 26/02/2011 19:54

veritythebrave, yes thats what my OH said or I must have a lookalike that they're after.

BreakOutTheKaraoke, no I did'nt have a pram, just a basket & a carrier bag.

If M&S have such a big problem with shoplifters they should put security tags on everything, never understood why they dont do this.

OP posts:
ruddynorah · 26/02/2011 19:59

it would cost more to tag every item than the amount lost in theft. higher value items are tagged in the more vulnerable stores. where i work we have about 17,000 items delivered every day, not including food items. imagine how many staff it would take and for how long to tag each of those items.

NotWoozy · 26/02/2011 20:10

I DEFINITELY POSITIVELY resemble the most prolific local shoplifter ever in my area. I am followed in all my local shops, posh ones, cheap ones, chain stores, you name it. I have never taken as much as a sweet in my life. But I can feel it in my bones I look like someone who steals a lot. it bothers me a lot actually.
I did manage to glimpse the security guards in a shopping centre looking at a folder of photographs of people from CCTV from a shop once, with brief descriptions underneath each shot, so they do keep photographic evidence for themselves to then target lifters. I just dearly wish I didn't look like one of them!

fedupofnamechanging · 26/02/2011 20:20

You should have asked him to make himself useful and carry the shopping basket!

I don't know if this has ever happened to me. I am woefully unobservant and probably wouldn't notice. If they were so unsubtle that even I couldn't miss it, I would have a quiet word with the manager or with the security guard themselves. Being so blatant, is actually very rude and I would object to that.

preghead · 26/02/2011 20:25

I definitely agree it's the buggy - they think there is opportunity to sneak stuff in so watch closely. I have only ever noticed this when pushing buggy. Same with the bloody Chuggers!