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AIBU?

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Original poster

To hate smokers

309 replies

Siennablue · 16/02/2011 20:39

I have just spent ten days in hospital with my gorgeous dd2 as she slowly recovered from pneumonia. I met lots of great doctors and nurses they were amazing. But the majority of parents were scum. Children kept being admitted with asthma, tiny children struggling to breathe. One 18 month old was on her third admission. Almost every parent smoked, and so did every person who came to visit these poor kids. Then every few hours they have to leave the kids and go for a fag. They made the ward stink.
Wouldn't you think your baby gasping for air and screaming in terror would be enough to stop you smoking?
Bloody scum

OP posts:
softpaw · 17/02/2011 18:03

smokers pollute the air? do you go up to every taxi/bus/car driver?

AppleHEAD · 17/02/2011 18:04

Sorry scum was too much but it was a horrible experience and I felt for all the children and their parents.
You can't defend them and you can't defend smoking unless you are really stupid.

softpaw · 17/02/2011 18:05

yeah monty,i'm up for that!

motheroftwoboys · 17/02/2011 18:16

My DH is a recovering alcoholic (so an addict) and smokes - as do most recovering alcoholics. just go and stand outside an AA meeting Smile. Although I detest his smoking with a vengeance I realise it is a lesser evil. He reckons it is harder to stop smoking than stopping drinking. But that could be a good excuse! Honestly though, alcies are recommended not to try and stop smoking until they absolutely secure in their recovery.

xstitch · 17/02/2011 18:23

YABU to hate smokers but YANBU to hate smoking.

Whatnamechange · 17/02/2011 19:03

findingstufftochuckout I would live to quit in three days I hate that I smoke and I hate even more I can't seem to quit because normally I am really stubborn when it comes to doing things . I don't defend smoking I just really don't like it when people judge you when they don't know the situation or you at all , I will look into those tablets . Do you ever still crave one ? Can you really become a non smoker , (please say yes!)

innocent-21 · 17/02/2011 19:31

I am a NON smoker - there is hope Smile

I stopped smoking 10 years ago - didn't even try. Long story short = went out on a v v big night smoked at least 30 Marlboro red (eek!!!) next morning awoke hungover and feeling sick. Managed to smoke 5 fags even though I was sick between them, 3 the next day and of the third day I thought, "What the fuck am I doing??"

I have never had another fag - took this to make me realise how much I was harming myself.

My darling mum has smoked for forty years - will never quit - I love her but HATE the smoke! I remember PFB being held by mum at only one day and when she passed him back he smelt (slightly) of smoke. Very sad.

begonyabampot · 17/02/2011 19:42

i loved my mum but I really resented her smoking and it definitely had an impact in our relationship. From her feeding us as newborns (blowing smoke in our faces), to her and the house stinking of smoke which actually can make you want to gag. To her smoking in the car, making us sit in the smoking sections of buses, plains ect. She even burned a fag hole in my communion veil when i had just put it on, nice! There was also the times I used to worry sick as a child that her smoking would kill her - and it did. Had the opportunity of nursing her and watching her gasp for breath and dye of lung cancer - she was only in her 60's and my kids won't remember her. I'm glad she gave up the last few yrs of her life or she probably wouldn't have seen much of her grandchildren as she would have insisted in smoking round them and i couldn't have allowed that.

And to those who don't smoke round your children - you still stink and the effects still get to your children. The Op probably could tell they were smokers as they still would have been reeking. Do you really think you don't stink?

mumsgotatum · 17/02/2011 20:47

YANBU...sorry but smoking is just completely pointless and absolutely disgusting to see it being done around kids, especially if it's exacerbating their illness.
The other worst is mums pushing prams whilst smoking.
Smoking stinks and you can't escape it if you don't smoke. When someone is smoking walking along the street they leave a smoke trail behind them which you can't get away from and goes in your face and lungs; and those of my DC's. thanks for that...
Also fag ends litter the pavements. Use a frigging bin if you insist of killing yourself with the cancer sticks

usualsuspect · 17/02/2011 20:48

We get the message ....

mumsgotatum · 17/02/2011 20:49

motheroftwoboys , I know many recovering alcoholics who don't smoke

baskingseals · 17/02/2011 20:52

feel thoroughly spanked

LynetteScavo · 17/02/2011 20:59

YANBU

I felt the same when walking into hospital to have a scan to confirm a miscarriage, past a heavily pregnant woman smoking.
I was a smoker before I got pg, but gave up because I didn't want to deprive my unborn child of oxygen. I wanted the best for my child, more than I wanted what I wanted.

Oh, and you don't have to frisk people of smell their clothes to know if someone smokes. I could geive several example of times I've been able to smell out a smoker.

porcamiseria · 17/02/2011 21:24

OP what an upsetting time for you, it must have been very scary

BUT, BUT

not all smokers are the same! not everyone that smokes subjects their kids to it, thats all. there are many that smoke, and dont puff all over their kids

supersewer · 17/02/2011 21:25

inherently selfish is a bit strong!!
it is an addiction after all.
I'm not a smoker but I can't give up chocolate so why should I insist a smoker should give up smoking (especially if their kids are sick arguably a very stressful time)

begonyabampot · 17/02/2011 21:46

you don't have to 'puff' all over your kids. You really don't understand how strong you smell even when not smoking. My mum used to pop her head round the door of my bedroom at night to say a quick goodnight. That was enough to fill the room and make me want to boak. Bet you feel disgusted when next to someone with heavy BO - well thats you to many non-smokers. My mum couldn't believe just how disgusting the smell was when she finally stopped smoking - still got her with lung cancer in the end though.

And as for your kids - you do realise with all the no smoking education that they probably worry that your smoking will kill you - i know I did with my mum when I was little - but that's not really important.

FindingStuffToChuckOut · 17/02/2011 21:48

whatnamechange yes yes yes. Never give up on stopping. I've had the odd urge and the odd puff over the years (always after a few drinks) - but I don't like it at all. The hold nicotine had over me has gone. I recall one unsucessful attempt to stop which combined with PMT - curled up on chair paralyser with tension fear and rage. Feeling like if I moved I would physically lash out and harm someone. Terrifying. Eventually went to shops for civvies for my sanity and others safety. Nowdays the odd drunken craving is no threat at all. It's just a craving, it will pass in a few minutes, it does not dictate my behaviour. Best of luck

mumsgotatum · 17/02/2011 22:08

So what if it's an addiction 'after all'. Addictions can be broken, I should know

OnEdge · 18/02/2011 18:41

begon I am really with you on this. A year ago, I found my dad cheynestoking and had to call 999 and help maintain his airway until they arrived. My Mum was hysterical in the hallway while the paramedics "worked" on him. He was then flown to A&E, and we were sat in a room, and told to prepare ourselves for the worse. We, did, and cried our hearts out, hugging each other as my Dad lay in A&E in a coma with the staff doing all they could for him - because he fucking SMOKED !! Thanks Dad ! Selfish bastard ! (he actually survived after 10 days in ITU ) it was pneumonia.

Mum, a non smoker had to endure years of smoking related misery.

Dad disabled in his fifties due to Claudication.
Mum frequently stank of fags when she left the house.
House was all nicotine brown.
Never any money
Grandchildren came home reeking of it. (my kids Angry )
As a child, I too was frightened that my Dad was going to die due to all the stop smoking campaigns.
Fag burns in carpets, clothes furniture where my Dad fell asleep smoking.
Dad setting fire to a sheet terrifying my Mum in the middle of the night - she slept with an axe by her bed so she could smash the window in case she was trapped in a fire.

Selfish selfish TWAT - its other people that have to pick up the pieces from this.

cigarette - has a light at one end and a selfish twat at the other !

OnEdge · 18/02/2011 18:43

I was addicted and managed to stop dead, havn't touched one for 18 years.

Needless to say, i started smoking by copying my Dad and smoking his fags.

OnEdge · 18/02/2011 18:46

OP - YANBU - they are selfish scum !

southeastastra · 18/02/2011 18:56

jeysus op you must be very bitter with all that hate inside you - have a fag and chill out

scum??? really?

OnEdge · 18/02/2011 19:00

She has good reason to bitter.

mrsscoob · 18/02/2011 19:00

If anyone is thinking of giving up I would really really recommend those plastic fags. Nicotine inhalators I think they are called? You can get them on prescription from the docs or from supermarkets/chemists.

OnEdge · 18/02/2011 19:00

*to be